ʻO ka pane pōkole i ka nīnau i haʻi ʻia ma ke ʻano o kēia ʻatikala, "ʻAe, ke hoʻomoe paha ʻoe i ka porn i kahi moe."
No kahi makahiki 7 i kēia manawa ke noʻonoʻo nei au e hele mai ana ka luna wahine. A ua like paha ʻaʻole ʻo wau ka mea nāna i ʻike.
Kēia manawa ua leʻaleʻa ka poʻe nui i nā mea e holo nei, a ua lilo ʻo ia i ʻike maʻamau ua hoʻokumu ʻia ka porn i ka erectile dysfunction (a me nā ʻano ʻano ʻē aʻe ʻē aʻe) i nā kāne. Ke aʻo ʻana i nā kāne pehea e lilo ai i ka maikaʻi o ka moena… akā ʻoi aku ma mua o ka wā.
ʻO ke kiʻi ʻoniʻoni hou, ʻo "Don Jon", i kākau ʻia, kuhikuhi ʻia, a me starring ʻo Joseph Gordon-Levitt ka manawa mua i hana ʻia ka hoʻomana porn i loko o ka moʻomeheu kaulana, a ke manaʻo nei wau he ulu nui a maikaʻi ia, inā ʻaʻohe mea ʻē aʻe. ke kamaʻilio hou ʻana i ka mainstream. [loiloi a ma ka male ma Reddit]
I ke kiʻi ʻoniʻoni, ʻo Jon, kahi kāne kāne wahine uʻi, alpha-kāne e ʻae he makemake ʻo ia i ka porn ma mua o ka moekolohe me nā wahine maoli. Ma hope o ka moekolohe, hele mau ʻo ia i ka wā ma hope o ka hiamoe ʻana o ke kaikamahine a me kahi wikiwiki me kāna kamepiula lawe kamepiula.
Ua hoʻomaka wau e ʻike i kēia 7 mau makahiki i hala aku nei, i ka wā i hoʻouna mua ai au i kahi nūhou e pili ana i nā wahine ʻaʻole hiki ke loaʻa nā orgasms i ka wā moeʻuhane, a loaʻa iaʻu kahi tsunami o nā leka uila mai nā mea heluhelu MALE e noi ana inā hiki iaʻu ke kākau i kahi nūhou no MEN nā mea ʻaʻole hiki ke loaʻa. orgasms i ka wā moe.
Pēlā wale nō e maopopo ai iaʻu kahi e hele mai nei i kēlā manawa ... ʻaʻole wau i lohe i nā kāne i hiki ʻole ke loaʻa i nā orgasms i ka wā o ka moekolohe. ʻAʻole lohe ʻia ia i kaʻu hanauna. ʻOiaʻiʻo, ʻoiai, nā kāne hiki ʻole ke kūkulu i nā kūkulu no ka moekolohe, ua kamaʻilio wau me lākou no nā makahiki me ka kūleʻa nui. A, ʻoiaʻiʻo, nā kāne i hele wikiwiki mai i ka wā o ka moekolohe ... Ua hana wau i kahi papahana holoʻokoʻa no lākou ...
Akā ʻo nā kāne i loaʻa ka pilikia, a i ʻole he mea hiki ʻole paha ke hana me nā wahine maoli he mea hou ia iaʻu, akā ʻaʻole ia e noho hou. Ua kāhea mai ʻo 3 o kaʻu mau hoa 20 he mea iaʻu i ka pule aʻe e noi i ka mea like.
Ua ʻōlelo kekahi o lākou he pilikia kāna ejaculate me nā wahine maoli, a ua ʻōlelo ʻo 2 e "hoʻopau" iā lākou iho ma hope. Ua haʻi pū kekahi o lākou iaʻu i loko o 6 mau makahiki o ka moekolohe me nā hoa he nui a me 3 mau hoa wahine lōʻihi, ʻaʻole loa ʻo ia i moe me Viagra.
Paipai wau i kahi papa inoa o nā mea no kēia mau kāne e hoʻāʻo ai. ʻO nā mea āpau i hiki iaʻu ke noʻonoʻo. ʻO kekahi o lākou, "malia paha e haʻalele ʻoe i ka porn."
I kēia manawa, mau makahiki ma hope mai, aia ka ʻike i loko a maopopo leʻa: pili hou ʻo Porn i ka lolo o nā kāne e maikaʻi ʻole i ka moena.
No ka mooolelo, makemake wau i ka porn e like me ke kanaka e hiki mai ana ... ʻO ia hoʻi, ʻike wau ʻike ʻole ʻia.
Wahi a ke kahu, "Inā ʻoe i ʻike i kekahi wahine i kapa ʻole ʻia, makemake ʻoe."
Ua kamaʻilio wau i nā kāne makemake ʻole i ka porn a nānā ʻole iā ia. Aia lākou. Akā makemake ka hapanui o nā kāne i ka nānā ʻana i nā keiki he nui a me nā keiki ʻōlohelohe e pili ana i nā hana moekolohe ʻokoʻa. ʻO kēia, ʻoiaʻiʻo, ua hoʻololi ʻia i loko o mākou.
ʻAʻohe aʻu helu kikoʻī, akā ʻike ʻia ka hapa nui o nā kāne i hoʻopau i ka porn wikiwiki wikiwiki e like me aʻu: ʻike lākou i ka porn e leʻaleʻa nui, hoʻomaha loa i ke koʻikoʻi, mea pakele loa, a hoʻopulapula loa.
No ka mea, ʻaʻole i hele mai ke kiʻi porn kiʻekiʻe i koʻu ola a hiki i koʻu mau pōkiʻi 30, ua hiki iaʻu ke ʻike a nānā i nā loli i hana ʻia i loko o koʻu ola.
Aia wau i ka pilina me ka wahine nani, akā mau nō wau e "wiwo ʻole" i porn, ʻaʻole wale ka hoʻolimalima o kaʻu ʻano hoa hana no kaʻu hoa kāne, akā pili pū kekahi i kaʻu hana a me nā hana hoʻonaninani.
Malia paha ua ʻoi aku koʻu nānā i ka nānā ʻana no ka mea aʻu e hana nei no kahi ola: Ke kākau nei wau i kahi nūhou ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo moekolohe… No laila ua hoʻomaka wau e nānā i ka mea e hana nei, a ua haʻalele wau.
No nā kāne e ʻike ʻole ana i nā mea e hana nei, a i ʻole nā kāne i ʻōpio ua ʻōpio ua ulu wale lākou i 'porn porn, ko lākou kūlana a me ko lākou hiki i ka wā e neʻe i ka moe kolohe me ka wahine hiki ke ʻaihue ʻole me ka ʻole o maopopo i ka loaʻa.
E like me ka hapa nui o nā kāne, ke hoʻomaka ʻo Don Jon e aloha me kāna wahine “hemolele 10 ″, ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke hoʻōki i ka nānā ʻana i kāna porn. Ua koho ʻo ka fiction ʻaʻole e nānā i nā ʻoiaʻiʻo maʻamau… ʻAʻole pilikia ʻo Don Jon i ka paʻakikī, ʻaʻohe ona pilikia ejaculate, a ʻo nā wahine pū me ia e hoʻopūʻiwa nei iā ia.
ʻAʻole ia ka mea maʻamau ke hele i ke ao maoli.
I kēia manawa aia nō ka ʻike maikaʻi loa ma laila e hoʻihoʻi nei i nā kāne e pili ana i ke kumu o ka porn i hoʻoiho ai iā ED (ʻaʻole hiki iā lākou ke paʻakikī a paʻa paha), a me ka ʻike maikaʻi loa e pehea e haʻalele ai i ke kiʻi porn a loaʻa hou i kāu libido, a hoʻākoakoa hou i kāu lolo. i kona kūlana maʻamau.
ʻO ka alakaʻi koʻikoʻi koʻikoʻi ma kēia wahi ʻo Gary Wilson nona kona pūnaewele. "ʻO kou ʻōpio i kāna porn" ʻo ia ka mea i kū i ka lewa honua-no-porn-addiction.
Inā ʻoe i liʻiliʻi iki paha i ka ʻepekema, ka hōʻoia, a me nā hopena o nā mea e hele nei me nā kāne (a ʻoi paha nā ʻōpio'ōpio) a me nā kiʻi porn, makemake nui ʻoe e nānā Kūkākūkā ke TED Gary:
Aia kekahi pilikia ʻē aʻe i ka wā'ōpiopio, ka wahine, a me nā kāne i hele mai hoʻi mai ka porn ... a ʻo ia ka nui o ka hoʻonaʻauao e pili ana i ka hana o ka moe maikaʻi.
ʻIke nā poʻe'ōpio i nā mea āpau a lākou e ʻike ai e pili ana i ka moekolohe mai ka porn me nā hopena kaumaha.
E like me Cindy Gallop i kāna ʻōlelo 2009 TED, "Ua lilo ka porn Hardcore i ka hoʻonaʻauao de facto sex. "
Ua kamaʻilio ʻo ia e pili ana i kāna mauʻike me nā mea aloha ʻōpio i aʻo maikaʻi ʻia e ka porn ma ʻaneʻi.
ʻO ka mea pōʻino, ʻoiai ke hāʻawi nei ʻo ia i kahi koho ma luna o kāna pūnaewele ʻo "Love Love, Not Porn", ke manaʻo nei au i ka hopena, ʻoiai e hoʻohui ana i ka naʻauao a me kahi manaʻo ʻē aʻe no ka moe kolohe, ke ʻimi nei nō ʻo ia i ka waihona puke o ka porn i hana ʻia e ka home. ʻo ia nō he "aloha" sub-ʻano.
I nā huaʻōlelo'ē aʻe, he hopohopo kekahi noʻu ʻo ia i hoʻokumu i kahi pūnaewele e hāʻawi i nā kāne i ʻae ʻia e nānā pono i nā porn ʻē aʻe.
ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, hana maikaʻi ʻia ka porn no ka hoʻonāukiuki ʻana i ka ʻike. Minamina, ʻaʻole like ia me ka mea e hana maoli ana no ka hana ʻana o kekahi i kekahi.
ʻOiai ʻo ka paʻi ʻana i ka porn kahi hana ʻike, ʻo ka moekolohe kahi hapa wale nō kahi hana ʻike. Pili ʻē aʻe nā manaʻo ʻehā, ʻo ka mea nui i waena o lākou e hoʻopā ana. A hui pū ʻia nā manaʻo ʻelima a hui ʻole i ka hapalua o nā mea i hoʻomālamalama ʻia i ka SEX…
ʻO ia ka hiʻohiʻona a me ka noʻonoʻo pono o ka hana aloha.
Ua kamaʻilio wau e pili ana i kēia ma kekahi o kaʻu mau wikiō wikiō, a maikaʻi ʻo Gary Wilson i ka hoʻopuka hou ʻana i ka blog "The Brain On Porn" ma ʻaneʻi: Alex Allman I Pehea e hoʻokaumaha ʻia
Hoʻomaka maoli kēia kamaʻilio ʻana.
ʻAʻole maopopo mākou i ka piha piha o ka pōʻino, a i ʻole e nui ai ka ʻino.
Ke kākau nei wau i kēia maʻu ma ka liʻiliʻi o 4 "mau paʻahana" e kūʻai ana i nā papahana me nā hōkū porn e aʻo ana i ka loaʻa ʻana o ke ʻano ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ... e pili ana i ke kumu kūʻai i manaʻo ʻia e nā poʻe ʻōpiopio e ʻike ʻia nā hōkū porn e pili ana i ke kumuhana maikaʻi. …
Akā ʻo ke kūʻai aku i ke kālā maikaʻi ʻole, a ke hoʻolilo nei lākou i miliona miliona ʻoiai ʻo nā kāne e hoʻomau i ka ʻike hewa e pili ana i ke ʻano o ka wahine i ke ola wahine a me ka wahine.
He diabolo paha ka porn?
Nope, pili wau inā ʻaʻole.
Pono e ʻāhewa ʻia?
Kūʻē wau i ka kānana ma ka laulā. Akā ke ʻae wau i nā kānāwai ʻōlelo anti-hate a ke manaʻo nei ʻaʻole mākou maopopo loa i kēia pilikia a hiki i kahi manawa pane piha. E like me nā pū, manaʻo wau he mea liʻiliʻi loa ka hoʻomalu ʻia o ka porn ... a me ka lana i ka hiki ʻole ke kūʻē i ke kulekele no ka poʻe pākeke ke hoʻoholo nei e makemake lākou e hoʻomau i ka porn.
Hiki i kekahi mau kāne ke nānā i ka porn me ka loaʻa ʻole o ka hopena maikaʻi i ko lākou ola?
Malama paha. Aia ka poʻe e hiki ke hana i ka cocaine ma ka leʻaleʻa hoʻokahi manawa me ka hoʻopilikia ʻole i ko lākou ola. ʻOiai ʻaʻole maopopo ʻia ka loaʻa ʻana o ke kiʻi porn i kahi kiʻekiʻe ma mua o ka coke, a pono hoʻi e mālama ʻia e kekahi kanaka.
Ua haʻi ʻo Don Jon no ka nui o nā kumu i makemake ai ʻo ia i ka porn i nā wahine maoli. Ua hōʻuluʻulu ʻo ia iā ia ma ka ʻōlelo ʻana hiki iā ia ke "nalowale iā ia iho" me nā porn. ʻO nā mea āna e noʻonoʻo ʻole ai he ala maʻalahi loa ia. Pehea ka ʻoluʻolu a me ka hōʻoluʻolu o ka hoʻokuʻu ʻana iā ʻoe iho i ka hoʻoulu ʻia ʻana me ka hopohopo ʻole o ka hoʻoholo ʻana. ʻAʻole hoʻoponopono kāu kamepiula iā ʻoe no kāu mau kinks a me nā waiwai kūʻai.
Aia paha kekahi mea nui e aʻo ai ma laila no nā poʻe aloha e makemake e lawe i ka ʻōlelo a Julianne Moore ma ka kiʻiʻoniʻoni, i ka manawa e haʻi aku ai ʻo ia iā Don Jon ʻo ka wahine maikaʻi loa ʻo ia ke "male ʻoe iā ʻoe iho i kekahi kanaka, a nalowale lākou iā lākou iho."
ʻO ke ala wale nō KA MAU KĀI AINA i ka manawa aʻike maoli ʻoe iā ʻoe iho. A nāna kēlā mea kūikawā i kāu hoa.
Ke hoʻohana nei i kēia ʻatikala e hoʻokolokolo ai i kāu hoa a hana hewa paha iā lākou no kā lākou hoʻohana ʻana i ka porn paha i ʻole e kōkua nui ʻia ma ia ʻano.
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