Intimate Relationships and the Brain

intimate Porn addiction hijacks our pair-bonding mechanismThese articles were not written with porn addiction in mind, yet they may be worthwhile to you. If you are addicted to porn, it’s likely that your intimate relationships are suffering, or non-existent. The theme that runs through these articles is how mates, or potential mates, speak directly to their limbic brains—the place we fall in love. They do it with signals called ‘bonding behaviors’ or ‘attachment cues’. The neurobiology of love and the evolution of mating are covered here. Perhaps you will view sexual relationships differently after reading these articles.

  • Human Brains Are Built to Fall in Love What do your dainty eyeteeth mean for your love life? Contains the basics on pair bonding and social monogamy. Sheds light on why we fall in love with a significant other, but chimps do not. Explains that pair-bonding is not a societal construct, but a brain program.
  • Committed Relationship: You’re Wired For It Pair bonding is a biological program not a cultural construct. More research confirming that humans are pair bonders, and a discussion of how lots of casual sex isn’t typical of humanity as a whole.
  • How to Talk to Cupid What signals are you sending your mate? How to steer your primitive brain in the direction of staying in love. What to do when the honeymoon ends. Explains how attachment cues or bonding behaviors bypass our conscious brain to strengthen our relationship.
  • The Lazy Way to Stay in Love Steer your limbic system to sustain romance. The most In-depth look at bonding behaviors. Contains a long list of bonding behaviors for you to try out. Our most popular article on love and attachment.
  • Staying in Love Monkey-Style Why are pair-bonding tamarins and humans different from chimps? How do monogamous monkeys stay in love? With monkey bonding behaviors. Explains how the brain is organized to pair bond or to fool around. Yet we, like tamarin monkeys, have certain behaviors that can increase closeness and impact our biochemistry positively.
  • Calling All Skin-Hungry Cuddle Sluts How viable is the concept of sexual self-sufficiency? If you’re in between lovers, and feeling frustrated, what about finding a cuddle buddy? Read about how four twenty-somethings benefited from snuggling with a close friend.
  • Can’t She/He See I Need Sex? Beware the brain numbed to pleasure. How neurochemical changes after sex or orgasm can put partners out of sync. Explores the unique theory that orgasm can temporarily shift perception of one’s partner.
  • Another Way to Make Love Elude the Coolidge Effect with a forgotten approach to sex. Introduces a more gentle approach to lovemaking. A new concept for most, yet it has been around for thousands of years. It is truely intimate.
  • Oxytocin, Fidelity and Sex Can a guy keep himself faithful by jacking up oxytocin? How can “the love hormone” make men subconsciously keep their distance from attractive, novel mates?