Tales of Porn-Related ED 8

Tales of Porn-Related ED 8 is in an 8-part series of stories with a very small sampling of self-reports by various men who have experienced porn-induced ED. For more stories check out these porn-induced ED threads and forum sections:

• Too much porn/masturbation cause ED?  (3300 posts)
• 22 with porn induced erectile dysfunction?  (450 posts)
• Porn-induced ED section: YourBrainRebalanced.com
• Porn-induced ED section: RebootNation.com
• Porn-induced ED section: NoFap.com
• Porn-induced ED sub-reddit

Browse thousands of recovery self-reports to learn what those who’ve recovered have experienced: Rebooting Accounts Page 1, Rebooting Accounts Page 2, Rebooting Accounts page 3, and External Rebooting Blogs & Threads.

My Addiction to M2P (Masturbating to Porn) was not restricted to just Video porn. I would join swinger sites, make up fake profiles, get access to other swinger pics and profiles and masturbate continuously to them also. See, I have a problem with acne. And I noticed that when I M2P I would have an outbreak of acne a few days after ( I’m dead serious). But I noticed that when I master bated to the swinger profiles, I would not develop acne a few days after. And I masturbated to porn and swinger website pictures for hours at a time. So for a few months last year and a couple of months the years before, I would actually not masturbate to porn for a month or two, just the pictures on swingers websites. At the time I was dating a girl, and even though I was not M2P, and just masturbating to the swinger pics, my erectile dysfunction continued. So, it’s become obvious to me that just constant masturbation either to video porn or pictures of anything sexually related contributes to my Erectile Dysfunction.

What we think what causes ED are just observations on our part, but most of us have had the P2M problem for years, so I think we have a pretty good idea of what is happening to our bodies. It is absolutely not normal for a man ages 12-50 not to be able to maintain and sustain an erection and have regular and fulfilling sex. It’s either something medical, or in my part and that of so many others on here constant stimulation to porn and related videos, pictures, etc…… Have made you psychologically or physically impaired you from having normal male erections. I am the first to attest that. If Harvard or any other institution did a study, I would be the first to volunteer and tell them my story. M2P has completely ruined my sex life. As of January 1st, I’m clean of M2P. there have been a few close calls, and there was one about an hour ago. Got so far as to pull my pants down and turned on a video. But I just got up and went to the kitchen. It’s a horrible addiction………

Here’s the kicker, I’m going to meet a very attractive young lady for sex tonight. No date, drinks, etc….. Just go to her place for sex. Yet, I’m here fighting off the temptation to masturbate to porn, it’s a horrible addiction. I’m 11 days pf M2P………

I’ve been at it for a solid year. Well, not solid. I’ve relapsed quite a bit. I have probably gone a month at a stretch. But most of my relapses were with real sex. Anyways, this phenomena is real. Had sex once last night, and then again this morning. I’m not 100% yet but 10 years of damage will take some time. Had sex sporadically the past month too and everything was fine.

My last step is informing my Dr who sent me to two urologists to help me. I pray we can inform the medical community so other young men can get help. (LINK)

17 years old rebooting [RELAPSED recently]

I’m a young man from Romania, i’m 17 years old and suffer from ED,PE anxiety and i get very depressed when relationships end. So my story goes like this, i had real contact with porn at age 11-12 and since than I masturbated, i over did it, 2-4 times / day. Since i was 16 i did it a bit less , 1/day , sometimes 1/2-3 days (there were times when after 3-4 days of no porn i would do it for 4-5 times). I am not an ugly guy, I get alot of compliments from girls, especially about my eyes. But simply sex with a normal girl didn’t happen ( girl was virgin or we did not get to that point in the relationship)  I had a few sexual intercourses with hookers.

First time went pretty good, i was a little nervous but managed to get a good erection, as you know, there are sociable hookers and nonsociable ones. So i got a few nasty experiences were i wasn’t able to get a proper erection , finish fast,  and i developed a kind of anxiety , but the porn did the job and messed up my brain. I remember one time were this girl was very hot (my type, big behind and medium breasts) very sociable and that was the best sex i had. Hard rock erection, no PE , was awesome. Than i met a girl and got into a serios relationship and got worried about my problems, often searching answers on health sites but no one seemed to have the right answer

No Fap Success Stories

I’ve noticed even after a just few days, of abstinence from porn and masturbation that I am more attracted to women. (I’m usually picky, because of porn’s unrealistic expectations probably, lol) Also, I am achieving erections much easier with the girls. What are some of your success stories or improvements that you’ve seen?

I’ve discovered that my ED symptoms are in fact porn induced. Here is some background info:

-I’m 18 years old.

-Started watching porn frequently 14 years old, masturbated maybe 3-4 times a week with it on.

– Started a relationship (still going) 3 years ago, when I 15. Still masturbated.

– Lost my virginity at 16, but couldn’t get erect at all. I put it down to nerves but after several other failed attempts, with the girl I love, I started to wonder whether something was wrong.

– Since then, I have had successful sex (to the point of orgasm) maybe 10 times to date. However, only a couple were so good that I didn’t have to constantly check whether I was still erect during mid-sex, I don’t know what made it work on these occasions but something did, reassuring me that it was indeed possible to have very pleasurable sex. 80% of the time, I find sex unpleasurable, hard work and I need to masturbate to orgasm after she has come.

– Over the last year, having continued to masturbate to porn on a regular basis,I have noticed a lot of changes sexually:

1. It is near impossible to get an erection around my girlfriend, even in sexual situations. We often force oral sex to achieve erection and eventually orgasm, but this must be accompanied by “dirty talk” that mimics the fantasies I enjoy from porn. Although she is fine with this, I don’t feel this is natural, and it has become increasingly hard to orgasm, complete concentration must be used to get anywhere.

2. I no longer think about sex during the day, and my random erections have ceased to exist. I don’t find other girls attractive, where before I would have some growth in my pants just being in the presence of these girls.

3. Porn choice has completely changed, I no longer find hardcore or even lesbian videos stimulating, its become more drastic and extreme, like gangbangs and things of a more unrealistic nature. Not only this, but I also find myself spending almost 30 minutes surfing through different videos to get off to, whereas before a glimpse at boobs was more than enough. The strange thing is that I don’t actually crave porn, its more of a routine, like before bed etc. I’m currently on Day 4 of my reboot, and have had no cravings at all. However, in the last 3 months, I have been on porn and masturbated more than ever because I had ankle surgery, meaning I have been stuck in my room for the last few months armed with a laptop and high-speed internet, it was definitely more out of boredom.

4. My penis feels less “awake”, it feels cold when flaccid and it gives me the impression my flaccid size has shrunken somewhat. I never measured, but I’m sure there’s been a decrease in size, and I feel small and weak down there.

—————————–

DAY 9 – WELL LADS…THERE’S BEEN A TWIST IN THE TAIL

As I said earlier in my journal, I was beginning to feel as if my ED was more a consequence of over-mastibation rather than being completely porn-induced ED.

And today, I think I may have proved myself right.

9 days without PMO gives the body, specifically my penis and testis, to recover from the physical trauma of mastibation and ejaculation. Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time since the 9 days started, and I had rock hard erections, I’m talking 100% strength erections, she noticed them straight away during cuddling and kissing, which turns me on a lot.

Suddenly, my libido was back, I felt almost a new man within this tiny time period without PMO. Unfortunately, we didn’t have a condom, so she gave me oral sex and for the first time in ages, it felt truly amazing:

1) The sensitivity in my penis had almost completely renewed itself, I could shut my eyes and just focus on sensations rather than having to imagine porn scenarios to orgasm.

2) I no longer felt like it was my mission to orgasm, I could sit back and relax and enjoy what was going on, whereas before I’d have to concentrate seriously (I even had to make sure the room was completely silent on previous occasions).

3) My penis was rock solid, 100% erection. Not only did this make me the happiest guy alive to see that this was actually possible again after years of weak erections, but my girlfriend thought I had taken viagra or growth pills because she was amazed at the size and hardness of it.

4) The orgasm itself was far longer and enjoyable, and she noted the load was thicker than its ever been (an increase in sperm count through abstinance?) Not only this, but my penis was still hard after ejaculation for a few minutes, whereas before it would have completely wilted away even during ejaculation!

My conclusion, and pointed out from the reasons above, is that my penis and testis simply needed a rest from all this excessive masturbation over the years – I’d gone 4 years without longer than 2 days resting from masturbation. In my case, over time the masturbation leads to a weaker performance from the penis, and the reduction in libido is the body trying to tell you “give me a break, I’m tired!”. Of course, because of porn, I never gave my body a break because the dopamine spikes induced through porn made me have such a thrill that I masterbated through this “injured penis” stage, so much so that it reached a point of ED. This also explains why I was able to have sex enjoyably a couple times in the past – I must have taken a two day abstinance to let my penis recover.

However, porn has definately affected my views on sex in a negative way, and I will continue to refrain from masturbation and porn, allowing for longer recovery periods between sexual activity with my girlfriend (assuming we don’t have sex every day haha). I will test this out with sex when I see her next week. So happy I found this out, I haven’t missed porn at all, I was never addicted to porn, I was just addicted to masturbating and porn made it easier to ignore my body’s tiring signals.

I’m 21, and suffering from ED. So starting from the beginning, I think I’ve been masturbating since a long time before I was 10. Just touching my penis felt nice and I would O way before I could ejaculate. This escalated when I was around 10 when i had a television in my bedroom. Late night television which showed topless women was now my chosen material instead of my imagination. This soon escalated to the occasional M with internet porn when my parents were not at home. It become a little excessive, and sometimes I would do it up to 5 times a day.

Ended up getting a girlfriend at 17, our first few sexual experience I was as limp as anything, but i now put this down to nerves and anxiety with losing my virginity, because as soon as it happened, we were at it like rabbits every day. Porn usage dropped, but still existed, and i seem to develop a bit of a love for anal porn, which I then took to my relationship. It wasn’t a massive issue at first, but after about a year I seemed to only be able to go once a night or twice if I was lucky and then i would be unable to get it up. Although if i was teased with the prospect of anal sex i would instantly get hard again and be able to go. At the time, the lack of erection after round 1 didn’t affect me at all. it seemed to annoy the girlfriend, but i just thought it was the norm, as I’d already ejaculated. And I know she was satisfied, I think she was just upset by the thought that she didn’t turn me on anymore, which wasn’t the case. I was still watching porn though and masturbating so this must have had some effect on erection quality. I did often prefer masturbating as it was a quick easy release.

We eventually broke up as most relationships do, and i then resorted to PMO again. I think it was made worse now by the fact I have my own PC in my room, and so I was accessing Porn everyday more or less. Thought nothing of it as it seems everyone is doing it these days anyway. However, i haven’t been able to get an erection when naked with a girl since, at all. Been home with a few girls after nights out, and started fooling around, got a semi, but that was it. So frustrating. Blamed it on the booze, but it kept happening, so i just avoid getting into sexual situations now. I recently had sex with my ex again, after 11 months of being broken up, and i was only able to keep it up for a few minutes the first time, and the second time i was going so fast in an attempt to keep it up, I Premature Ejaculate after a minute. It’s just become a huge issue for me now, I think that made me realise P has been bad for me, as objectively i was really turned on by seeing her naked, just nothing happened down there.

Tried to give up PMO on New Year, relapsed yesterday as I was ridiculously horny (that or just had a PMO craving, as I didn’t have an erection, I just felt horny. This seems to be what normally happens, I think I feel horny, but I don’t necessarily have an erection, and then as soon as I click on the Porn website, I get an erection, and masturbate like normal. I never seem to have marathon sessions either, it’s normally a very quick act, just to get that O). So yeah, starting again today. I’m just hoping it makes a difference, and I’m able to get erections just from thinking about sex again, like I could when I was 15.

19 year old with fetish and ED

Intro

First of all thank you so much for that board, I´m extremely surprised about that friendly and familiar atmosphere around here! I opened a thread yesterday ( http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=2028.0 ) and was very surprised at the friendly answers. So I decided to start a journal as well. At this point I already have to thank everybody who takes his time to read my entries. Furthermore I have to apologize for my English, I´m not a native speaker.

My Story

(Trigger warning) I´m 19 years old and I have a strong fetish to femdom (this is where a submissive male is dominated by a woman) and girls feet (sorry for naming it). Also I suffer from ED.

I think this fetish (and also the ED) is porn induced, because I clearly can see the escalation ladder. When I was 13 years old, I started masturbating to normal fantasy, then to random pictures of girls, then to pictures of girls feet and then I discovered short 30-second-clips of fetish porn. But the worst period began when I discovered the long, free and unlimited Tube-Videos.

In my early teenage years I was unbelievable bad with girls. I went to school to get good grades and then the first thing I did when I came home was turning on the computer and jerking off to porn. But when I became 15-16, I developed the deep desire to get a girlfriend “like all the other guys in my age”. So I looked in the internet for tips to pick up chicks and started to practice very hard to get better with girls. I read every information I could get and started going out extremely often in order to approach girls. And I started to get better and better (while I still was jerking off to porn). At this point I didn´t even notice that I had ED, because till then I didn´t go further than kissing, and I thought it is normal to not get aroused by this. I was convinced that I will be turned on as soon as I´m in bed with a naked girl. But as I got better, such situations started to occur and I couldn´t get it up. At the beginning I had thoughts like “I was only to drunk” or “maybe I didn´t find this girl attractive enough”. But after countless failures I knew I had to change something. First I thought something with my testosteron was wrong, so I did everything to rise my testosteron level. But this didn´t work. My situation was miserable. I worked so hard to get good in picking up chicks (I don´t want to come across as arrogant, but I think I´m pretty good in this right now and some of my friends are flirt coaches, so I´m always open for questions in this regard – just feel free to ask me, I would be glad to help! 😁but when I had the girl in bed I couldn´t benefit from it.

So I started my first Reboot in July 2011 where I went around 110 days (but watched some porn from time to time). At the end I had successful sex with a girl, but only with a semi-hard dick. A few days after I got also a blowjob where I was a bit harder and I wasn´t aroused anymore by femdom (but still feet). But then I did a big mistake: I relapsed.

I relapsed because I thought I was cured and can masturbate again. So I told myself, that in the future masturbation without porn once a week is allowed. But once a week became quickly once a day. And soon I started fapping to porn again for the next 1-2 months. At the end of that binging-period I had my dreamgirl in bed and couldn´t get it up not even close. My dick was completely dead. That was a very memorable incident for me that I couldn´t even get it up with my naked dreamgirl next to me. Also the fetish for femdom appeared again.

This is why I swore to myself to fight that addiction definitively. I try this desperately since January 2012, but couldn´t succeed thus far. I always relapsed between day 20-30 and made it only once till day 50. Until 2 months ago I tried to reboot with a girlfriend, but I was only able to come by handjob (and sometimes blowjob). And I noticed that this slowed down the progress. So now I avoid intense contact to girls and focus completely on working out, spending time with my family and learning for college.

I have only recently heard/read about porn-induced ED but it makes a lot of sense in my case. I have had no problems getting an erection and ejaculation to porn as long as I found the porn I was watching to be stimulating enough, which meant the porn actresses had to be very hot and soon or later novel to me. However, while I was in a relationship, I couldn’t maintain my erection for very long, condoms were a problem in particular, and I couldn’t ejaculate. The stimulus just wasn’t enough. Getting an orgasm with masturbation alone without watching porn became difficult – I could not always reach an orgasm this way. I first thought the problem was low testosterone or ED from an organic cause. Testosterone was tested to be within the normal range and tadalafil did not really help much.

So, now I decided to reboot my brain and see if this helps. I started with abstaining from watching porn at the beginning of December. I did not stop masturbating until December 20.

I first noticed that getting an orgasm from masturbating without watching porn was getting easier. This was a positive effect.

However, since I stopped both porn and masturbation, I experienced the following symptoms:

* I often feel depressed. I don’t feel much joy in doing anything.

* I feel very lonely. I am currently single and not in a relationship. Since stopping PMO I have a very strong feeling that I would like to be with someone but not necessarily for sex. I feel there is something lacking. I would love to have a woman to hug, to kiss, to cuddle with. Never felt such a strong desire for this before.

* I feel a lot more emotional than before, which I don’t like as it makes me feel less manly.

* Libido is mostly very low to non-existent. However, sometimes just reading sexually associated words or seeing pics of hot women in ads makes me extremely horny. The strange thing is that this is often not associated with getting an erection.

Will keep you updated when things change.

Lost kid (Day 29 PMO free) day 85 total

Thanks for reading this. Well I’m gonna start off by saying when I read YBOP I felt confident that I had this problem. Along with P.ED I have hocd. It is such a bitch. I won’t get too into tho.. Anyways I’m 17 and been looking at porn constantly since the age of 10. I would do it at least 2-5 times during a day. Rarely ever took breaks unless I had to.

I’m currently on day 39. MO about 8 times :/ god dammit. Good news is I had my first wet dream in my life around day 20.

(Age 23)Later on, we were cuddling more and things got a little bit more sexual– we were feeling each other’s privates and I realized I could not get it up at all. I was completely baffled by this point.

From years of my internet porn use I thought that I had a huge libido, and the size of my erection is rather gifted so I felt like I was set for any girl who would want to have me. I craved becoming a lover + satisfying women. I felt confident about it before this experience.

I went to the bathroom and tried to masturbate to get to a full erection. I could seriously not do it. It would get to like 45% at most and quickly die. I eventually returned to the bed feeling the irony of obsessing over sex and women for a decade and here I was with this beautiful girl right in front of me and I couldn’t feel anything down there. At first, it SERIOUSLY blew my mind when I was with this girl and I couldn’t get it up. I couldn’t fathom it considering how I was like with porn. Never thought in a million years that I could have ED.

Same problem here, too much porn watching.

Addicted to the hottest chicks I can find online.

To me it has a lot to do with seeing things, if I can watch me ******* a girl I can get an erection and come easily. If I do oral sex and don’t see much I lose it.

Jerking off is no problem, watching porn and jerking just the way I want it makes me come in minutes

need to quit the visual stuff, that’s a problem for me.

I’m just starting this journey, over 30 years old, been watching porn since I was 13 maybe? Lifelong habit of compulsive masturbation and porn watching and avoidance of actual intimacy and sex with women.

In a new relationship, first one in years, and I really want it to work. Problem – no boners, pretty much ever. I’ve noticed over the last 3-5 years that I would get hard less and less, but when I watch porn I’m usually hard the whole time. When NOT watching porn, however, pretty much nothing can get blood flowing down there. In this new relationship, doesn’t matter what my girlfriend does to me, no results, no hard ons. She feels crappy, like it’s her or something, which of course it’s not. And I feel embarrassed and ashamed, so often times have pushed her away from touching me or trying to do things, leading her to feel rejected and now she’s shutting down sexually altogether. Still haven’t had sex, how could we? The whole bedroom situation has become a disaster! And now I’m feeling more and more pressure to get this problem solved, making it even worse.

So, here I am, trying to resensitize myself. No porn or masturbation for a week now. No change thus far. I will keep posting on my progress. I hope this works! I remember back in the day when I would look at a mildly attractive woman and get hard. Now, put the hottest woman on earth naked in front of me and I wouldn’t have any response at all. Hell even normal porn does nothing for me, has to be some sort of oddity or extreme. This is embarrassing, frustrating, and heavily impacting my relationship! I’m going to start counseling as well to help with this and other issues I have.

Will post on my progress regularly.

Mike’s Road to Recovery

Little bit about myself: I’m 19, and started masturbating when I was 10, with porn usage starting a few years later, averaging about twice a day.  I never realised this was a problem, or that it could be the addiction it’s been, until I met my first serious girlfriend back in October.  We’d attempt sex most nights we were together, and I could usually get it up, but it would never stay up for long, probably because I never felt any physical pleasure from sex.  My brain was enjoying it, sure, but my dick felt nothing.  So I kept PMOing – it was the only way I could get any release, and in a way it was my way of confirming that I could still perform.  And god bless her, she stuck with me and tried to help, but I think that was one of the reasons for us breaking up in the end.

That was back in April, and I’ve been PMOing since then.  I actually found YourBrainOnPorn a few weeks ago, and looking at all these success stories (as well as the science behind what I now know is porn-induced ED), I know that this is something I need to face, and something I’m damn well going to beat.

I’ve always found that I’m better at sticking to something if I have a list of reasons I can look at, so:

1. Be able to perform in bed – Kind of a no-brainer, this one.

2. Better social interactions – I’ve always been an introvert, and I know that rebooting isn’t magically going to reverse my personality (nor do I want it to), but if it helps me to improve my social skills, then that’s a damn fine bonus!

3. More energy – I actually tried rebooting a few weeks ago, when I first found YBOP, and managed 12 days.  I remember how much more clear-headed, outgoing and generally energetic I felt, and I want to feel that again.

4. More self-esteem.

5. More time to do other things – Every moment I would have spent PMOing, I can spend doing something more constructive – exercise, read a book, watch a film, practice my saxophone, anything.

6. Learn to appreciate life more – This was another thing that so many people here and on YBOP were talking about, and if that’s what rebooting can do, I want in.

7. The sheer satisfaction of looking back at the end, knowing that I had an addiction to porn, and knowing that I beat it.

Hello Everybody, Going to be a long post, you’ve been warned

I am a 30 y/o long time PMO’er here, since the tender age of 8. Back then, I shot blanks and was mainly using imagination, well, until I discovered my stepdad’s “stash” off porn. Was socially awkward mostly through high school, especially with girls, although I was also kind of popular because of my prowess with sports and was a pretty good looking guy as well. Never could “Seal the deal” however, and was a virgin throughout H.S. I lost it maybe a year after to someone who, well, was let’s just say she was like the Pillsbury dough boy, everyone gets a poke. And way more experienced than me… I was just so sick of being a virgin when even kids who I thought were complete TOOLS were getting laid and not me.

Anyways, it was unsatisfying for both of us and that ended after a few months, so I pretty much remained celibate until I was 23. Started reading up a lot of mind/body stuff, eastern medicine philosophy and came to the conclusion that my masturbation habits were causing my problems. Lack of motivation, shyness, not feeling “the power”. Basically what is said in here and YBOP but with more of a mystical approach. I kicked the habit, started reading some PUA sites, and it did work for me. I ended up with a girl for 4 years. IT was good, in fact… I went from being shy nice guy to and alpha jerk, and yes I did cheat on her and i do regret it still to this day. I guess I just wasn’t used to this female attention and new found confidence. Our sex life was great, although we never “made love” it was almost always hardcore fucking and sucking… we did cuddle a lot though.. I guess we just never could combine the two. Anyway, it did start to dwindle… and two years into the relationship or so, I started falling back into my porn habits, even harder and with high speed internet becoming available, i started looking at more and more fetish/kink stuff. As I started to wack off more, we had sex less often, even though I still wanted it. I also didn’t perform as well as I used to. Well, eventually it ended, and I was crushed.

I delved into porn hard, along with a cocaine habit for about a year. I think the combination of the two really screwed me up and opened the flood gates to a severe addiction to porn and particular kinks/fetishes. I also have been a heavy drinker which doesn’t help, although I have cut way back in the last few months and have no intention of going back. I have had many sexual partners since, but nothing really totally satisfying and I’ve had to rely on cialis because I have screwed myself up so much that I can’t get a decent hard on without it. I usually cop it from my stepdad, and have ordered it occasionally but it’s so damn expensive. I am not wanting to rely on it anymore. I also need to think of these kinky scenarios/fantasies that I don’t want to happen in real life, and they repulse me.

I am otherwise in very good shape, healthy, look young for my age other than the fact that I am pretty much completely bald, but women still find me attractive despite that. I still live with my parents… the stereotypical stoner/loner/slacker that lives in mom’s basement. I have my moments where I am outgoing and gregarious, but it’s usually when I’ve been drinking. I present myself well, dress good, speak well… have talents that I have wasted or am wasting. It kills me… I should be doing so much more with myself… I lost most of my friends… I have some still but my old friends have all pretty much have abandoned me.

I just want to see a woman I find attractive and FEEL SOMETHING again… I feel nothing. I work with many attractive women, and I just don’t even respond… i just stare blankly into space, some even flirt with me and i just like… don’t respond. I used to be very flirtatious, even when I was an inexperienced young man. I’m just like super jaded or something…. It’s sad.

So, yesterday was my first day PMO free. Woke up feeling a little bit more energetic than usual. Planning on going for a nice run in the snow before work. Going to try and be more social instead of just avoid eye contact like I usually do. Only time I’m social is when I’ve had a few drinks… so I need to learn to be social without. I also feel more creative when I’ve abstained, which is another reason why I want to kick this… so I can really dive into my music again and feel that creative flow again. I just wanna feel warm and glowing again, kinda like I did when i had that healthy relationship before, but in order to get that and attract a woman I need to get my game tight again. I just think about all these super successful people in all areas of life.. and think to myself… “do these guys sit around wacking off to internet porn all day?” Highly doubt it.

I really hate what gets me off. I have a thing for very big women… I’m not talking healthy/normal chubby women… I’m talking 300lbs plus. I always liked a bit chubby women with curves but now, I only like the really big ones it seems and it’s disturbing to me. I think the years of looking at pics of chubby/big butt girls just kinda slowly escalated into liking full on obese women with massive asses. It’s funny because women that used to turn me on so much before don’t really do it for me anymore. I also find myself more and more getting into the dynamic where you “watch” not participate. Clearly not good for healthy sex, when you have to imagine your partner fucking someone else other than you to get a boner. I can deal with liking obese women, but I Don’t like this one bit. It seems like an eternity when just looking at normal porn stars in the typical porn scene would be enough for me.

Thanks for reading this long post, I plan on posting daily or at least every few days as motivation to steer clear of PMO’ing.

Thanks for all these posts. I’m 29 years old, have been masturbating to porn since I was around 12, probably once a day/five-to-seven days a week. I was in a serious relationship from ages 19 to 25, and with that girl, sex was great. I was horny most of the time, and I never had problems getting up. It was a real relationship — a meaningful one. She was the second girls I had been with.

That being said, after that relationship, I went on a bender of sexcapades with various girls… girls who meant nothing to me, other than sex. That’s when the problems staying erect started surfacing. I wasn’t used to wearing a condom, and once I started wearing one, I would lose my erection shortly there after.

I made the foolish mistake of not using a condom a few time, and luckily, I never caught any diseases. Nevertheless, in those situations, without the condoms, I was able to keep my erection.

However… now, as the years have gone by, I have continued to watch porn, and masturbate, etc. Now, I find myself not even able to keep my erection without the condom. It’s like I’m so used to the way I jerk myself off that a girl’s vagina barely meets the mark. I think this also has to do with porn, since regular sex just doesn’t seem to do it.

For the most part, though, I think this may have to do with the fact that now sex to me has become meaningless, physical fun. It used to be associated with “love,” but now, since I’ve been “broken hearted” once or twice, I seem pretty closed off to love. I think that’s what’s keeping my johnson down. Anyway, I just thought I’d bring the element of “love/honest affection” into the equation to see what people felt about it.

As for the pledge to not ‘bate to porn, I’ve been giving it a try. I’m on day two right now. So far, I’ve had erotic dreams and mild morning wood, but no killer boners just yet. I can’t wait to reboot this whole thing. I’ll keep you guys posted.

Thanks for the all the honesty.

Breaking this lifestyle once and for all!

I’m 19 and have been masturbating pretty much daily since I was 10 (pretty much from the moment puberty hit). Until recently, this never seemed to be a problem – parents, books and school were all telling me that masturbation was completely healthy, I’ve never had any problems with my academic work, and I felt that any social anxieties or problems could be chalked up to me never being much of a social animal anyway, and above all, it felt good, so I kept on doing it.  As far as I remember, PMOing developed gradually: first fantasy, then random movie scenes, nude images and finally hardcore porn.  I’ve never gone right to the extreme end of the porn spectrum (simulated rape, bestiality etc), but there was definitely some escalation over the years, though like I said earlier, apart from a vague sense that I could be doing something more productive with my time, this never seemed to be a problem.

So, after a secondary school life with practically nothing to show for a love life (first kiss at the age of 18, nothing beyond that at all), I went to university last October, and somehow found myself sharing a bad with a flatmate within three weeks.  I’m still not sure exactly how that happened (she’d broken up with her boyfriend, I was being sympathetic, one thing led to another…something like that), but it did.  Of course, as you’ve probably guessed by now, when we decided to go all the way, it didn’t work.  I could get it up pretty strongly, but the damn thing wouldn’t stay up.  Over the months we spent together, we blamed pretty much everything – performance anxiety at first, then me putting a condom on, me having a condom on (serious question, are those things supposed to be tighter than my deathgrip?), me being tired, our physical relationship developing too quickly – you name it, one of us probably thought of it at some point.  By the end, I was pretty damn good at making her come, but nothing she tried on me worked.  In the six months (on and off) we spent sleeping together, we attempted sex most nights, and I came three times in bed, always though me jerking off after she’d given up.

Now, I was still watching porn during this time, even though both of us knew that it wasn’t helping my problems in bed.  For most of it, we were just friends with benefits, and so I justified it by saying that we weren’t in a relationship, and what I now know to be a porn addiction was screaming that I needed release, I needed to come.  And more than that, my ED was seriously worsening my depression.  Being unable to perform in bed really made me feel like less of a man, and plummeted my sense of self-worth.  PMOing helped to alleviate that.  Looking back, I think that the fact that I was watching porn hurt her just as much as my inability to perform in bed hurt both of us, and I still feel absolutely terrible for that.  We had a brief spell as an official couple back in February, and I made a serious effort to stop the porn then (I felt that it was only one step away from cheating on her).  I lasted five days before the sexual frustration took me back to the porn, and so the spiral of depression continued.  Eventually, she found someone else, and my PMO habit continued, bringing us to now.

I’ve been telling myself that I was going to stop watching porn and masturbating at various points these last few years (with no success, of course), and I was looking up sex addiction after watching “Shame”, which, apart from being a fantastic film, made me realise that I was heading towards the kind of life the main character had, and that that was not somewhere I wanted to be, eventually stumbling onto YBOP.  Learning that I had porn-induced ED, and realising that I wasn’t going to get out of it without rebooting, finally gave me enough of an incentive to give up PMO.

12 days.  I eventually relapsed on day 12 (10th July), and since then I’ve not been able to go more than 3.  In a way I’m glad, because this has really helped me recognise what some of my triggers are, but I’ve not matched that first attempt at rebooting.  Yet.  I’m not sure why – even after just those 12 days, I was feeling much more confident, outgoing, energetic and clear-headed, and I still remember how bad I felt after that intial relapse.  I really want to get back there, but I’m not sure if what’s stopping me is the fear of failure, apathy, or a lack of confidence that I’ll succeed after all these relapses.

So here I am writing this, hoping that making and updating this journal will help to keep myself away from relapsing.  My target’s 90 days without PMO, or as long as possible if I’m still single after that time.  I know that this is going to be a bloody hard thing for me to do, but I’ve got a massive list of reasons for curing myself (which I’m going to type up tomorrow – it’s 1:30 in the morning right now!), and I know that it’ll be worth it in the end.  So if you’ve just read this wall of text I seem to have churned out, thanks for reading.  It’s felt good to get this all off my chest.  Thanks as well to everyone else who’s written a journal or has inspired me in some way to beat this.  I can do this.  I know I can.

Posted a couple of months back…… My E.D. because of masturbating to porn began soon after installing broadband internet in my house in early 2004. Took me close to 7 years to figure out why my erections had become non-existent. I would spend 1-2 hrs a day 7 days a week M’g to Porn. If i didn’t do it for a day or two, that meant I would masturbate to porn 4-5 hours to make up for it a couple of days later………………..It was a horrible-terrible addiction. In December I went 14 days without it, fell off the wagon. But with the new year I have taken a new stance against no porn-masturbation. I will admit, I still masturbate, like any other guy. My friends admit to masturbating all the time, but have no problem getting erections. I’m honest with them about not getting erections cause of porn-masturbating addiction and they just laugh……They can’t believe a good looking guy like me can’t get hard with some of the attractive women I spend the night with( I have disappointed a lot of great looking girls)……. But I will freely admit and will be the first to testify that masturbating to porn, for whatever reason, whether it’s chemical or psychological, will keep you from getting normal erections……… I’m on day 6 and will keep you guys updated………I HAD to change, I could no longer continue to live a pointless and hopeless sex life. I would watch amateur porn on X-Hamster and think wow, how is it that these guys get and stay hard. There older than me, in worse shape. It just didn’t make sense. But I knew why I could not get and maintain erections. I was in complete denial……………..But it’s now or never, either I beat this thing now, or else it will beat me with no hope of ever beating it……………………

I have just read the whole thread and watched the 4 vids, which are great by the way, they give some hope

OK, time to face up to my addiction and Porn induced ED.

I’m 39, been M to porn since I was 13, been M to internet porn since I was 18 and got ED at 30. I couldn’t work out what was happening, I wasn’t in a regular relationship so it didn’t effect me too much apart from the embarrassment, but it wasn’t all the time so I just got on with it.

Then at 31 I got into a relationship with a girl 10 years younger than me. She was insatiable, wanted it all the time so I decided to get myself checked out. As I now know there was nothing physically wrong and so I started using Cialis. It was great at the beginning, I couldn’t believe it, the erections where so strong and I could even repeat on them. Life was good for a change. Then after a while I couldn’t even get it up on that stuff so I changed to Viagra, it got a little better, but the ED eventually come back to haunt me. All the while still M on the net, gradually looking at harder and harder stuff. I think at that time it was a combination of porn and anxiety. At 33 that relationship ended due to other reasons, but I’m sure ED played a part. I dint want to talk about it, I got annoyed when she wanted sex.

I played around a bit, and started using sites to meet girls for occasional sex. As with any addiction, that got worse and started to get into bondage and very hardcore sex. The amount of hours I have wasted on finding the ‘right girl’ to fulfill my sordid fantasies is unbelievable, if I had channeled all that time and effort into education I could have a few degrees by now, what a waste of time.

I met a girl 2 1/2 years ago, so again went back on the cialis full time, 2 x 20mg pills a week, some times more. We moved into together 6 months ago. I still have trouble getting an erection around once a month and only have sex with my girl once a week now if she is lucky. My libido is next to nothing. I haven’t told her about my addiction, she has found my pills and I just say I use them now and again. I’m still meeting for kinky sex, I can’t leave it alone. I feel so guilty that I meet these girls but don’t want sex with her. She is 10 years younger than me and in her prime, she deserve so much more.

I think the thing that has escalated my addiction is that 4 ½ years ago I started a new job that means I work from home. It gives me the opportunity to sit at home all day and M. Literally over the last 7 workings days I’ve M on average for 5 hours a day. I’m not getting any work done and could lose my job over this. A comedian once said that when he learns that someone works from home, he always asks ‘how’s the M going’. How true

One year or so ago I discovered the link between porn and ED and haven’t done anything about it, but now I’m going to.

I never cheated on any of my other girlfriends, but I just haven’t been able to help myself. I love my girl dearly and don’t want to do this to her any more, let alone what I’m doing to myself. This is going to end, this has to stop.

I just hope I can return my brain to normal, have a proper life. It’s funny, writing this down and spilling my guts has made me aware how much I need to do something to get myself out of the hole I have put myself in.

Good luck to all of you out there, there is hope and I feel for the girlfriends and wives who have to go through this with them, often without knowing what the problem actually is.

Hey everyone,

Here is a little background info about me: I have been masturbating since I was 13 years old. When I started 9th grade, I got my first computer with high speed internet access. That’s when the porn and masturbation addiction began. I would masturbate to porn at-least once a day up until now at age 24. The longest I went without masturbation throughout that time was 7 days because I was on a cruise with a bunch of friends and couldn’t beat it without the possibility of them catching me; which would have been really embarrassing. During that cruise, it was amazing how badly I wanted to watch porn and masturbate. I literally couldn’t wait to get off the damn cruise ship to get back to my computer and fire up the porn. Pathetic, I know.

I started noticing around 12 grade that I was becoming socially anxious. I constantly worried about what people were thinking of me. I have always been somewhat of a shy person but there is a difference between being shy and social anxiety. I had no interest in hanging out with friends. Socializing just felt like it required so much effort; I just wanted to be alone in my room. I was constantly tired and had no motivation to do anything. I had no idea it was the porn and masturbation rewiring my brain. The funny thing is that I had always thought things like “Man, there has to be some kind of negative effect of me jerking off every day to porn”. Since a lot of my friends masturbated to porn, I thought it was normal. I looked at porn and masturbation as my drug of choice, except it was better than a drug because there were no negative side effects. Holy shit was I wrong. I soon began to have casual sex with a girl from school. The first time she gave me oral sex, I could barely maintain an erection. I couldn’t believe it, I was finally getting a BJ and I couldn’t keep it up. How could I be 18 years old and have ED? We fooled around the next day and once again I could barely maintain an erection while having intercourse with her. I felt so embarrassed. The problem then continued with other girls.

The social anxiety, brain fog, lack of motivation, and other PMO side effects continued to escalate. I began researching the internet on excessive masturbation and somehow ended up on Reuniting and YBOP. I couldn’t believe it. I began reading all the information on the sites. I was amazed how so many other guys were feeling the same way I was. I have been rebooting now for 6 weeks, with one relapse into week 3. I feel so much better. I still have a long way to go before my brain fully reboots, but I do notice around a 30% to 40% improvement. I’m more comfortable around friends and total strangers, I have more energy, more motivation, I’m in a better mood most of the day, and many other positive effects.

Hey, I found this site through yourbrainonporn.com. Anyway, after another unfulfilling sexual encounter with a girl a few months ago… July I think, I realized that porn and masturbation were my problem, I’ve been at it since my mid teens and like many here, I find it more enjoyable than regular intercourse. Anyway, I went a week at first, but then it was on and off trying to stay away. About a month ago I was with another girl, no intercourse, but she gave me a bj and a hj. It was barely enough, but I finally had my first orgasm with a girl (I’m 22). It really wasn’t satisfying so I decided again to try and improve. I had never been able to not masturbate for more than a week until I found yourbrainonporn. I recommitted, but only made it two weeks. I got drunk and indulged myself, and did so again the following day. I did notice that my penile sensitivity was greatly increased.

The downside to this is that I also discovered that the rush I get from PMO is larger again, so the past few days have been a struggle with 2 days off the biggest streak since my relapse on the 2nd. But I really want to make this work. On the two weeks off, I felt great! I could tell that girls were checking me out and I was being more assertive around them. Also I’ve been feeling depressed over the passed few months and this depression all but vanished during those two weeks. I know a reboot would do wonders for me, I just have to keep trying. I feel like reporting in here will give me some sense of accountability, so we’ll see how it goes and I’ll try to report in on a regular basis. Any comments or questions are welcome.

30 y/o male here…I have been struggling with wanking since I was introduced to it from the tender age of 8 by a friend. I look back; I spent most of my high school years awkward and shy, even though I was good looking and one of the best athletes around. I went bald very early… although I am genetically predisposed but no one went bald that early in either side. I did manage to get laid a few times here and there after high school, but nothing was satisfactory and I couldn’t cum from sex and would lose erections frequently. I always have been into “esoteric” knowledge, and I came across something that said men should not waste their semen (jing) and it all made sense to me. I quit for a while, met a nice hot girl and we had great sex…. during this time I was magnetic, i evolved from a guy chicks liked as a friend to a stud… much to the dismay of my ex because I did cheat from time to time. I was just reveling in my new found sexual energy that I never allowed to build up.

Unfortunately, I ended up going back to my old ways, and in sync with that, our sex life decreased and eventually we broke up after 4 years. I was crushed… And instead of giving up this habit I just went head on into porn consumption, and with high speed internet, along with a bad coke habit… spiraled out of control with this. My sexual tastes started getting much more specific and “kinky”. Eventually, I got to the point where I get barely an erection even while masturbating… sex was totally out of the question unless I had some viagra or something… then I was a stud but it still didn’t feel right.

Well, 4 years later, here I am depressed, anti social, nothing going for me and living in mom’s basement. I have decided once in for all to kick this habit, I know it locks me in a negative state. Anytime I’ve ever given up this habit, good things start happening. It’s not a magic cure but I really feel that you give off a different vibe when you’re “Full” of your manly energies. I have gone the last 5 days without and immediately I can notice my interactions with girls, and guy to be much better. I a much more relaxed, my voice is deeper, the girls seem to go out of their way to talk/flirt with me. I know they found me attractive before… I dress good, look great for my age despite being bald. I just feel a certain magic/sexual power… like I can seduce any woman and it’s great. I think most people that are saying this is bullshit are just so deluded… denial is very powerful.. few people have the power to look deep within their soul and question themselves. Ego is the destroyer of so many people… lose your ego. One of my best friends has potential to be a great musician, but he also is lacking in some areas and anytime I’ve tried to bring this up to him… he goes into denial or kinda does the in one ear, out the other thing. He will most likely not succeed on his own unless he has a major eye opening.

My personal belief is “they”, the powers that be, want a population of docile schmucks and I think that is why masturbation is encouraged so much. You’re weird if you DON’T do it… I feel so much more able to take action ALREADY and it’s only been 5 days into my “rebooting” process. I recommend people check out the website- yourbrainonporn.com It is quite enlightening, and explains how this is truly a bad thing to indulge yourself in on a regular basis without religious dogma or eastern mysticism for you scientific/logical types.

Now, I don’t think there is anything wrong with the occasional tug job, IF you’re not getting laid. If you have sexual prospects you shouldn’t even consider it. It’s not a necessity; you aren’t going to get prostate cancer, that’s a bunch of bs. Wet dreams are nature’s way of “cleaning the pipes” if you’re not getting sex.

It’s crazy how we went from being a totally repressed puritanical society, to a completely depraved wanton society who’s motto is, “if it feels good, do it” Where is the balance??? I think in 10 20 years it’ll become mainstream knowledge that excessive wanking, especially to porn is detrimental to ones well being. Sure, porn has been around for a long time… but never until the last 10-15 years have we been exposed to so much porn. You don’t have to go to the seedy “book store” to get your fix, and even then you’re only able to get so much and it costs a lot…. now you don’t have to pay for it (if you know what you’re doing) and can be up to your eyeballs in it immediately. That is not natural.

Think about highly successful people that you admire or want to be like. Do you think 2pac sat around beating his meat for hours a day?

Hi I’m 33 years old and married for just over a year. While my wife and I went on our honeymoon just over a year ago we tried having sex. I remained abstinent up until I was married (Although growing up having girlfriends I did other things i.e. heavy petting, oral) and so did she. So when we finally did it, it was needless to say awkward and clumsy. What I had noticed though is that I could get it up but as soon as I tried to penetrate I would go down. If I did penetrate I wouldn’t last long. For the past year this is something that I have been struggling with. My wife (God bless her) has been VERY patient and understanding. But we always thought that this was normal and it just take a while to “Get it right”

But something in me said something wasn’t right. Advice that I had gotten from friends was that I was just anxious, and I needed to relax. That could be part of it but it still wasn’t helping me. At this point in our marriage I was becoming discouraged. Sex was something that I couldn’t do and wondered if I ever could. I was afraid that I would never be able to have children. My doctor suggested that I take some meds i.e. cialis or Viagra but I really don’t want to.

Then I stumbled onto yourbrainonporn.com And it all made sense to me. A lot of these behaviors described me to a tee. Since I wanted to remain abstinent till marriage I used PMO as my outlet. And had no idea what I was doing to my brain. I feel that all those years of PMO have lead to my problems in my marriage. I have been using porn steadily since I was a teenager. But now I really want to kick the habit. Not for me really but for my beautiful wife who deserves so much more in the bedroom than I can currently give her. I shared with my wife all the research that I had done regarding porn and the brain and my problem with porn. To my surprise her response was “of course you’ve had a problem, you’re a guy after all”. And we laughed. I apologized to her for my use of porn even in our marriage, she said it was ok. I also told her of my plan to try a reboot and see if that would fix my problem in the bedroom, but this means that we couldn’t have sex for 2 months maybe longer. She is 100% on board and supporting me thorough this process.

George Clooney? Leo Messi? No, they most likely channeled that sexual energy into their respective crafts to further themselves along.

Hi I’m 33 years old and married for just over a year. While my wife and I went on our honeymoon just over a year ago we tried having sex. I remained abstinent up until I was married (Although growing up having girlfriends I did other things i.e. heavy petting, oral) and so did she. So when we finally did it, it was needless to say awkward and clumsy. What I had noticed though is that I could get it up but as soon as I tried to penetrate I would go down. If I did penetrate I wouldn’t last long. For the past year this is something that I have been struggling with. My wife (God bless her) has been VERY patient and understanding. But we always thought that this was normal and it just take a while to “Get it right”

But something in me said something wasn’t right. Advice that I had gotten from friends was that I was just anxious, and I needed to relax. That could be part of it but it still wasn’t helping me. At this point in our marriage I was becoming discouraged. Sex was something that I couldn’t do and wondered if I ever could. I was afraid that I would never be able to have children. My doctor suggested that I take some meds i.e. cialis or Viagra but I really don’t want to.

Then I stumbled onto yourbrainonporn.com And it all made sense to me. A lot of these behaviors described me to a tee. Since I wanted to remain abstinent till marriage I used PMO as my outlet. And had no idea what I was doing to my brain. I feel that all those years of PMO have lead to my problems in my marriage. I have been using porn steadily since I was a teenager. But now I really want to kick the habit. Not for me really but for my beautiful wife who deserves so much more in the bedroom than I can currently give her. I shared with my wife all the research that I had done regarding porn and the brain and my problem with porn. To my surprise her response was “of course you’ve had a problem, you’re a guy after all”. And we laughed. I apologized to her for my use of porn even in our marriage, she said it was ok. I also told her of my plan to try a reboot and see if that would fix my problem in the bedroom, but this means that we couldn’t have sex for 2 months maybe longer. She is 100% on board and supporting me thorough this process.

Speedy recovery, maybe.

I’m 18 years old and have been watching porn since i was about 13 or 14. I don’t think i was ever heavily addicted for those four/five years; i never got into really hard stuff and normally i wouldn’t watch porn everyday sometimes not even every other day. However, I’m pretty sure that porn use is responsible for my ED when i’m with real girls. I discovered YBOP in early August and i started to try a reboot around the 4th of August. I’ve MOed twice since then the first time to porn, the most recent being around the 13 or so without porn or fantasy. But since then i’ve been going for broke and trying not to jerk off or anything again. I start college the last week of September so i’m hoping to have regained a lot of erectile health by then so i can fool around with girls again. But if not i’ll just continue the reboot more. From some of the journals  i’ve read on here it seems that some of the younger guys had a relatively quick recovery, i’m hoping i’ll be the same.

On a side note I’m a pretty dedicated to fitness and weightlifting, normally i’ll work out 4 or 5 times each week. If figure that means I probably have a lot of testosterone could this be advantageous in my recovery?

It seems like every time I try to get horny, I have to go to the bathroom while I still don’t get an erection or barely get horny. I’m changing though. Starting right now, I’m quitting porn forever. I’ve been looking at it since I was 12. It all came crashing down when I was 18. I’m 19 now by the way. I had problems getting hard just fantasizing. I just thought it was all in my head, so I tried fucking this girl. She was naked right in front of me and I didn’t even feel anything, so embarrassing. Then about 3 months later I tried again with another girl, she was soo good and I couldn’t even get hard or feel anything. So embarrassing. I kept saying how it couldn’t be from porn. So I decided to give it a try about a few weeks ago. I went a whole week without PMO. I felt great, I even came close to getting a boner just looking at these girls doing yoga in my class. When I was talking to a girl, I started to feel aroused. But then I fell right back into the trap, back to porn. And I still didn’t feel it when looking at porn. It’s just so addictive. So now I’m calling it quits.

For me, porn is the greater evil.

Now I’m all for nofapping, because if I understand correctly, most of us are here because vanilla sex isn’t doing it for us anymore, and nofapping helps us return to normal again, but what causes this abnormality in the first place?

For me, it’s porn. I’m still not gonna fap because I’m so pissed at myself for getting to this level of fetish, but I don’t think M or O is as destructive as P.

You may be asking why.

I’m lucky enough that I had access to internet only at the age of 14-15, on a 28.8k modem. So any early life fapping was done with imagination (I already had submissive tendencies so I usually imagined soft S&M with girls I liked).

Then the internet came but femdom wasn’t that popular yet, so I spent most of my young porn days looking at vanilla sex stuff. I was again fortunate enough to have lost my virginity at 17, which was when I started searching more into femdom, but because this era was still in the 56.6k modem stage (DSL was too pricey), I never suffered from ED much.

Then high speed internet came and femdom branched out. There were tons and tons of sub fetishes. At first I was glad to just see .zips of pictures of those new fetishes. Then they turned to videos. Then harder stuff. Starting to notice how my fetishes have changed over the time, I got scared. I used to just enjoy a girl sitting on my face but now I have fetishes I’ll NEVER tell anyone in real life.

All this while I was starting to feel the ED (not really physical, but more “disinterested” in vanilla sex, thus no hard on). I figured I still could ejaculate in 3 minutes to porn so I thought nothing of it.

Then lately I’ve been getting lucky with girls, but whenever the time comes to do the deed I just feel like I’m going through the motions. Sometimes I feel as though I DON’T wanna do it. My thought process goes a little like this:

Man she’s hot, but I can’t get it up. WTF is wrong with me? She’s lying there waiting for me, why am I not bothered to do anything? Hm.. fingering her isn’t fun. I’m soft. She’s looking at me, I better fake pleasure.

All this thought makes me do everything with a pause, or lack of passion, and it gets really weird. Then when we get to poking, I end up being distant, I don’t moan, I close my eyes and focus really hard on my fetish. I almost never cum most of the time.

So I thought fuck it I’m forgoing porn, my fetishes, fapping, and I’m gonna make myself as desperate as possible so that the next time I make love, I’ll actually enjoy it. Then one Google search led to another, and I found out there’s actually a thing called porn induced ED.

To any skeptics out there, I can assure you, it’s REAL. It fucks up with real life, unless you’re willing to pay pro’s to live out your fantasies, which doesn’t sustain anyway.

But seeing how I went through life, I won’t say that M&O kills it. I’d say porn. Online high quality novelty porn. Fuck that shit.

Now whenever I have the urge to look up porn, I just think about wanting a proper lovemaking session, and I easily forget about it. It’s been roughly week 2 and I’ve been spared the withdrawals, but it might take a while before I actually don’t need to imagine my fetish to get off during vanilla sex.

I’ve been reading around and I think the worst is financial dom. I see a lot of guys who are struggling as hell, because they don’t even need to see porn. Once they hear a mistress asking them to give her all their money, they do, and for them, that’s one major P relapse. I’m so glad I just have normal femdom fetishes. But that’d easily escalate if were to continue down my porn road.

So for all you guys who’ve relapsed with M&O, don’t fret. Get back on it, but for the love of God try your best to stay away from P.

TL;DR Porn is your biggest enemy, not your bodily wants.

There is nothing wrong with masturbation in moderation (which could be once a day, or once every few hours depending on the person).

I, and many others, have harmful masturbatory practices. I stopped being able to maintain an erection with women consistently at 18. I’ve had huge issues with depression and anxiety that have been resistant to treatment. Shortly after I wasn’t able to even get a full erection with women.

I almost always used porn when I masturbated and taking 45 minutes to over an hour was not uncommon (between distractions –I’m always high when I fap– and searching for good porn it could take a while. Most of the time im just holding my limp dick in my hand).

I’m hoping nofap cures my ED. It’s extremely limiting. I haven’t seriously tried to pick up a woman in a decade.

It’s ok to fap. It’s just some of us have harmful habits.

I will say that my first two faps after going almost two weeks were insanely intense. The entire sensation was new. Breaks can benefit even those of you not engaged in harmful practices. Just find the right balance for you

LINK -NPH

Hi I’m 38yrs old and I’ve suffered from ED for the last 8years. I watched porn for the last 10 years but I never thought my ED was caused by this. I thought it was performance anxiety. My erections would be weak, I had no sex drive and there was no sign of any morning wood. Depressing times  I came across yourbrainonporn and decided to try it. It’s been 96 days without porn and masturbation and I’m having some success (morning wood is coming back and slightly stronger erections).           I’ve been in a relationship with a seriously hot woman for the last 5 months so I have been attempting sex at the weekends. I get hard but I lose it when I start to think about the lack of sensation in my penis. I literally cannot feel my erection sometimes. Crazy! I try again and I usually orgasm.

 

I’m wondering has anybody continued with sex with their partner and recovered? Am I slowing the process down by orgasming with my girl? I sometimes use natural herbal supplements because I fear it might not work.

One other thing has anybody gone through feelings of sadness with the reboot? These last 2 weeks I’ve had no sex drive or sensation whatsoever even though my girl is extremely beautiful. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.