Age 15 – Where did all this confidence come from?

I’m 15 years old, I live in straya and early last year I accidentally found out how to jack it. I was just watching some videos late at night on youtube and I just came across this softcore crap.

I got really turned on by it, starting playing with myself and the the rest is history. From there on I did it everyday and it eventually got the the point where I started to use porn. It ruined me, I starting becoming lazier with my school work, my anxiety problems went through the roof and I starting bitting my nails. I ironically found this sub by accident when looking for celeb nudes and didn’t think much of it at first but soon after, I placed all the pieces together and found PMO to be a major problem and here we are now. I relapsed and relapsed and it just got to the point where I was so done with it. It had been a few months and the best I could do was 15 days. 90 days ago this changed I told myself that this was the last time and your god damn right it was.

I’ll go through the main parts of my journey, here we go:

1st week – Having trouble resisting, at one point I pulled out my dang-a-lang and was getting ready but as soon as I was about to pick up my phone I had a change of mine and stopped.

2nd week – I had this dream of me MOing, it was very vivid and once I was finished in the dream I sat there looking at the ceiling with disgust for what I had just done and I just felt terrible and when I woke up I continued to feel terrible. This dream motivated me to never do it again and I went strong from that day on.

Jump to 4th Week – Holy shizzle! Where did all this confidence come from? Where did my anxiety go? I have no intention to masturbate at all, I feel as if I could fuck a horse and fly to Spain or some shit!… Uhhh wait no forget that last part.

2nd Month – Urges are completely gone, but I’m feeling very depressed, on the bright side I find myself to be more respectful of women and don’t see them to be objects so I got that going for me.

3rd Month to now – Once again, I don’t even think about PMO , its disgusting, however its been replaced with another habit: the internet, I’m having trouble getting off it and find myself wasting a lot of time on reddit and youtube however my avoidance of Facebook is going good so yeah… Fuck Facebook!

Notable Things

  • Well at the time of writing this, I just went to the movies to see Straight Outta Compton (Great movie, by the way) with a girl that I had been crushing on for a while and a friend, it was nothing sexual just three friends going to the movies but honestly I couldn’t really care, we all had a good time and thats really all that matters.
  • When it comes to women’s attention, nothing has changed and I couldn’t care less. My anxiety is almost completely gone but it comes back from time to time but thats about it.
  • Once I started NoFap I starting noticing other problems and addictions like the internet, video games and being a lazy asshole and not contributing to society, not to mention I starting working out (No weights just pushups and squats nothing too major) and eating better and my acne has really cleared up so thats nice.
  • I joined choir and starting learning guitar!
  • I could not give a single fuck about people’s opinions, honestly fuck them, if that person isn’t relevant in my life, why should I care?

Thanks for reading, if you have any questions, please ask, I’ll be here all night baby!