This is my experience with my longest streak I’ve had, which was 100 days during my senior year in high school, a couple years ago.
In the beginning of the school year, I started to really notice a girl who I had been in around for a few years. She was very nice and very pretty, and she had never shown much interest in being in a relationship. We were both in the high school band, and had the same literature class after our band period. We started walking to class together and talking pretty much every day. Towards the end of the first semester, we had an assignment where we all had to write an array of poems, so I thought I would write her a sonnet, trying to impress her with a more difficult style. I was no Shakespeare, but I was pretty happy with the end product. So I got a Christmas card, wrote the poem in it, and said that I’d like to hang out over the winter break and get to know each other better. Later that day at home I got a text from her saying that she thought I was a nice guy, but wasn’t interested in a relationship, which was a downer, but not unexpected.
On New Years Eve, I was hanging out with a couple friends and I asked one of them if they had any New Years resolutions. He said simply “NoFap.” I asked about it, and he explained to me more about this wonderful subreddit, and I decided to give it a shot.
After a few shorter streaks getting up to a week at most spanning over a month or two, I finally hit my stride, and I was just adding up the days and the weeks. With school back in session, the girl and I were walking and talking as we had done before. Something felt more right about it though, I can’t explain it exactly. We were just clicking better. Prom season was rolling around, and her friends, who I was also pretty close with, started asking me questions about who I was going to ask to prom, already knowing the answer. With their help, I came up with the best way I could have asked her to prom. Without getting in to too much detail, she would find papers with the letters to spell “prom” throughout the day and meet me at the end of the day to find a question mark. Everything worked perfectly, she said yes, and I can honestly say I think that it was the happiest moment of my life so far because I was finally able to feel so much emotion having not masturbated for about a month and a half. We went to prom with all of our friends and had a great time. It was definitely the highlight of my time in high school.
Fast forward: My streak is still going strong. 98, 99, I hit 100! And then, being a jackass, I think “Wouldn’t it be funny to just stop at 100 with no good reason?” So, I did it. But something was weird about it, I didn’t get the rush, the O didn’t feel that great. It was a waste of time, just like all of the other times I had done it. I was kind of upset with myself. That is when I thought I learned my lesson, and what I thought was the big lesson of the NoFap journey, which was there are so many greater feelings to feel than PMO.
The next day, walking with the girl felt different. It was like she didn’t want me around anymore. A few days later, shortly after school, she broke up with me.
Keep in mind I never told her about NoFap. But she knew something had changed, I guess I just didn’t seem like “me” anymore. Although it was a few years ago, I still miss her and wish I could go back in time and fix my mistake.
Now I’m in college with a pessimistic outlook, swamped with school work, having pretty shitty luck with girls, not really enjoying my major, stuck in a rut, and struggling with PMO. Today, tomorrow, and the days after that I’m making an effort to turn that all around. The “big lesson” I learned back on that 100th day is true, but that’s not the only lesson. To me, the lesson in this NoFap journey is to learn something about yourself and never stop learning. That sounds horribly cheesy, but that’s what I’ve gotten out of my experience and reflecting upon it. Thank you all for letting my finally share this all, and a very special thank you to those of you who read the whole thing!
LINK – My 100 days
by dhamgato
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