Wow! 90 days. I feel like it’s been a while, but I do feel quite a lot better after doing the challenge. My mind is so much clearer, I have so much fucking energy and anger now, but hey that’s ok! All I have to do is meditate, exercise and put that energy into positive vibes and routines.
I’ve totally sorted out my room, I’ve removed most of my tedious and unnecessary distractions, and it’s through doing No-Fap, that I’ve decided to stop pursuing a career in Arts, and start to possibly pursue other options like Philosophy, Law and Ancient History.
It’s through resetting my brain, that I’ve realized want I’ve actually wanted in my life…I’ve realized that my love of Fine Art is only a secondary love… an activity upon which I communicate my emotional passions and joys…but I don’t need that anymore, not as therapy or as a major desire anyway. I may have an un-diagnosed neurological condition that makes me socially awkward and suck in verbally communicating sometimes, but I’ll be damned if I don’t try to give it my all in fighting for the life I know I deserved all along.
The life where I am my own man who stops using crutches and technological distractions to carry me to the next road, and instead builds roads of his own out of hard work, perseverance and a determined fiery will. Although I can’t say I have many friends…I CAN say that I tried to make friends, and failed most of the time because I was scared and nervous. And that’s ok. But if someone doesn’t give two shits about my life, why should I waste my own eternity preoccupied with their blatant social fuckery and paradoxical mind games?
This is what I proclaim my fellow brothers and sisters.
Your lack of friends does not mean you are not a friend worth having. They FAIL to see the potential and the beauty that is within your unique personality and soul. Porn and masturbation are not fun pastimes…they are crutches of despair and biological compromise.
But it doesn’t have to be this way! And I encourage you all to keep on going with your streaks, so you can be the person that you ARE. You need to ACCEPT YOURSELF. Accept all of your personality quirks, and pros and cons, and become your own Judge. The Judge that passed a verdict to banish porn and masturbation forever.