A couple posts ago i was bummed out because i had no energy to do things.. especially when it came to skateboarding. well the past 2 days ive had so much energy to skate! instead of usually skating 7 hours a day, ive been skating 10+.
my confidence has gone up, not too much. but to the point where i could care less what people think about me.
and this one’s funny: i actually started getting back into meditating, watching naruto, learning about things.. mainly about the universe.
It’s funny because when i was on a 70 day streak like half a year ago i was into all of this and i actually felt great. then when i started pmoing again for like 5 months i didnt do any of that in that time. now these past 2 days ive been getting back into that.
i cant say its because i have more time on my hands, i think its because my dopamine levels are slowly getting better. what im trying to say is that im actually excited/happy when i think about these things such as meditating, reading a book, learning about spirituality, being open minded, etc.
and so far no urges! also the past 2 days all of my friends have been really happy when they have been talking to me for some reason. its like im somehow bringing a total different energy in the room.
i really think i can make it to 90 days and past! about a week ago i read this post someone made that was getting a lot of attention, im pretty sure most of you have seen it. but he talks about seeing change as a really good thing and pleasure as a really bad thing.
the next time i do get an urge, im going to use this to help me get past the urge. and i know people are going to give me shit for making a post at day 7, but im just really happy something different is happening my life.
for a while i was at the brink of suicide because i couldn’t get on a nofap streak for 2 years.. and couldn’t turn my life around.