This (almost) nofap year for me has been a year full of happenings. I graduated from my master programme. I got a job for which I’ve been striving, to have/start my career with, the last five years.
I’ve been continuing to train hard. In my department at work I’m probably the most fit, and people have been telling me this. I’m not used to this since I have never been in that position in any social group. My work is very social and both at work and in my free time I’ve recognized that I get much more looks from women compared with some years ago. But with that being said… one cannot exclude other factors such like that I’m more good looking now, I’m older and look more masculine. But sure, if you don’t fap you develop a great confidence and self-discipline that helps boosting other areas. You become very motivated to train. For exampe, I get up really early in the mornings to run for 15-20 min before going to work. It’s all about inner will, and that gets boosted from nofap over time. But this temporary setback doesn’t ruin this for me now.
About those women. Everything plays in. For me, I now feel like a great man. But my confidence come from so many areas, nofap being one of them. The others are: 1) I’m older and more masculine, 2) I’m in the best physical shape in my life, 3) I have a developing and social job which is the start of my career that I wanted, 4) I have financial stability, my assets are more worth than my liabilities (this is a huge factor for me, having grown up with parents that had higher liabilities than their assets and couldn’t hold and save money, so we never did anything fun, and there was always a lack of money).
Well, I know that some want more details about success with women during this time (I always searched for that when I needed motivation from one of the more experienced nofappers): -I interact with very well with women and girls give me many compliments. Actually both younger girls and elder women give me compliments that I’m charming and look like a real man. 5-year-younger-me would never believe this. -I dated a girl almost a year ago which was quite special. She was quite shy and didn’t let just anyone close into her life. After some dates where I had taken things very slow as I felt that she needed this we were going to do “it”. It turned out she was a virgin, which explained everything. Why she was so shy and not really comfortable with having body contact. I don’t want to brag about this. But for me this was a great evidence in that I was a patient, trustworthy and stable person who she could trust so much that she could give me her most holy thing there is, her virginity. Not all men are worthy this. But I felt worthy, because I had treated her with respect. It felt great to have gained that trust.
Some months later I was out with some friends and for the first time ever in my life a girl picked me up and not the other way around. I had been uninterested in this girl all night long. But she was after me all the time and after the evening we went to her place. This never happened to me before.
Some more months later I met a nice girl out and I had my first one night stand ever. Well… so did I thought. But we continued dating and meeting at weekends. She’s really nice and fun. We are still dating each other.
[Additional comment] I have a very social job. But due to long commuting I have difficulties finding time socializing on my free time. That was also the root cause of my relapse. Feeling a bit depressed about living so far away from my work. My plan is to soon move closer to the work to be able to live the life better.
I’m sorry if my post is written in poor English (not my mother tongue) or lacking a red thread. I was just writing my thoughts down and don’t have time to edit or rewrite. I hope it gives someone out there some inspiration.
For me this is not a defeat. It’s just a needed reboot to get things back to normal again. Today I will meet the girl I’m dating and tomorrow I will get up early in the morning as usual, go out for my 20 min run. Then go to work and being my best as usual. And suddenly one year will have passed again… 😉