I’ve always been really insecure of my flaccid penis and my erections. Once I realized it was because of PMO I knew that was it. It took me two years to really accept the fact. I was a very bad addict and three years later I still struggle with M and flatlines.
But since I started REAALLY taking this seriously about 10 months ago I have made some profound progress. I have finally had the erection that I knew was always there and it practically came on by itself with hardly any other influence. The other most important thing is that I am gaining happiness and confidence that has been lost for a very long time.
My hands and feet still go cold sometimes and I know it is directly from dopamine. I feel like I still use up my dopamine when I get erections. But the refractory period is very quick now. NOTE: there probably wouldn’t even be a refractory period if I could rewire properly… I know that makes me sound like a noob but I’m not. I’ve just been through hell. My mood still shifts from good to bad but the worst is over. More years than I’d like to admit have been forever lost but lessons learned because of my pmo addiction. But that only encourages me for success in the future.
Keep fighting the good fight fellahs. You WILL heal from this if you stay away from porn or anything porn related. If you can stop M you will only heal quicker. You may experience more depression and insomnia but you WILL heal quicker. Don’t give in, and if you do it IS another lesson learned. Every day is a new day. And if that day is a miserable flatline day. It is a good day because IT IS a healing day.
BY – brainclaim
I’ve been dealing with the horrible symptoms of flatline for a very long time on and off.. This just seems like it’s killing me.. I need some encouragement and someone to hear me.. And maybe help..
I’ve been rebooting for over two years, I’m 21. I have to be one of the bad cases. The things I’ve been dealing with are just very extreme. This stuff just really blows my mind and I think I’m going crazy because of it all.. This is my third and final attempt.
I know for a %100 fact that I will never watch porn again. The only thing I worry about is what kind of effect just watching movies might have on me, I have no urge to watch P whatsoever.. The last time I watched porn was in September of last year. I don’t know why I did after everything I had been through I was really stupid. Then I immediately went into a horrible flatline. I couldn’t piss and I got came down with prostatitis.
On top of that my dopamine balance has been like a roller coaster. Along with the feeling and size of my genitals, which I think is taking the biggest toll on me, like the back and forth stuff. There are some positives. In the past couple months I have felt the benefits of nofap more than ever. My mood and drive to live comes back sometimes along with my libido and penis. I definitely went through a very hyper sexual state that started on new year’s also, where I was getting like 100 erections a day and I was the happiest I’ve been in as long as I can remember.
I was REALLY attracted to women even old ladies haha it was really weird.. But it was like I was a different person, and I couldn’t believe how fucked up I was prior. But that only lasted a week and I went into the flatline that im lingering in right now. I had my first wet dream in my life that week.
Sometimes I’m an emotional wreck like cry at everything and sometimes I’m just like a nothing man.. My dopamine and other chemicals are just really fucked up… If I drink alcohol or smoke pot it’s like it drains any bit of dopamine I have, and it takes days to start improving. Anyone else notice that? I drank last night and today I just feel like nothing.. Completely brain dead like a dull robot..
Anyways so the two things that are reaaaaallyy bothering me are my mood and my genitals. It’s like the worst.. My genitals shrink up soo bad sometimes, and then when my mood and libido comes back it’s like a different penis completely. it almost doesn’t even make sense how small it gets when I’m in flatline. Another thing that gets me, on top of weird mood swings and thoughts, (and having to carry around a shriveled up confused penis all day) when I’m in flatline my hands and feet get really cold and white.