After 5 years of trying, I have finally reached the magical day 90 that I had only ever dreamed of seeing. Today feels like a fresh day for me, I don’t feel like I’m completely rebooted yet, but I feel like I’ve reached a point where I can move on with my life and no longer have nofap as my main focus. Hopefully those of you struggling through this reboot can pick something up from this post and use it to get past this challenge.
I’ve watched porn for about 10 years (I’m 23 now), but my obsession with sex and girls stretched back even further likely to when I was about 4 or 5. When I was introduced to porn at age 13 I was instantly hooked and would spend a lot of my freetime flicking through pictures on the internet, this eventually grew into videos and more weird material.
The strange thing was, that I never masturbated during this time, I just enjoyed looking at porn. I was always very popular in school and would get the top grades, it was only once I got hooked on the full PMO package that everything took a turn for the worse. At 18 I started masturbating to porn for the first time and from then on, my life became an absolute struggle in all regards.
My grades plummeted, I just kept failing courses no matter what I did, I developed social anxiety to the point where sometimes just saying a sentence around new people was a struggle and I lost all motivation to do anything, I used to spend hours lying in bed watching videos and TV.
How I Got Out
I think the main thing about nofap is knowing your triggers and treating them seriously when you’re aware of what they are. Only after 5 years could I be honest with myself to know that there were certain things I just couldn’t do if I wanted to beat this thing. These may change over time as you start developing longer streaks, but for me some of my triggers included:
- limiting time on phone
- rejection by girls
Once you’re serious about this addiction you will do everything in your power to avoid falling into these traps.
The 2nd strategy that I believe is absolutely essential is to work on the 3 main parts of ourselves that are lost during this addiction. I think the 3 main parts of ourselves that makes up who we are as individuals includes the mind, the body and the soul. When we become addicted to pmo these parts of ourselves are neglected and damaged and must be rebuilt to combat the addiction.
This can be anything that helps build back our intelligence and memory. Looking at many posts from PMO addicts, it seems that memory and intelligence are often affected by the addiction. For me, I undertook reading both fictional and self help books. I also started learning German, which helped improve my memory.
Doing some form of exercise on a regular basis is important for releasing those positive endorphins and creating a healthier body. Going to the gym or partaking in regular sport is a must.
This is the spiritual aspect of ourselves that we all need. For me as a Christian I did more regular Bible study and parayed a lot, but if you don’t have a belief in God I would say that you must at least meditate everyday.
Benefits and Superpowers
I will start off by saying that I didn’t really experience any of the superpowers, apart from on a couple of days where life was just beautiful and socialising was extremely easy. Nofappers going into this journey expecting to reach 90 days and be reborn as this ultra confident, jacked, stud will be sorely disappointed. As with all things, to reach these goals it takes time and effort- what nofap will give you is the time and confidence to achieve these goals. Saying that, there are still many benefits I have experienced during this journey:
- better memory
- increased gym gains
- easier to socialise
- better, more calibrated sense of humour
- A LOT more female attraction
- things are just easier now, my brain feels a lot faster
- better relationships with friends and family
- more confidence
As I said earlier, I still don’t feel completely rebooted- I still experience porn-like dreams, urges and when stressed, my brain still misses porn. I know that I will probably always be addicted to porn, but I now feel like I can move on and don’t have to focus and battle the addiction every day. Now I’m at this stage, I want to properly find out who I am, become much better socially and develop more diverse hobbies that define who I am.
I hope this helps and if you have any questions, please post below