It’s been 60 days since I last fapped. This is still my first „attempt“ (I don’t call it attempt but lifestyle change) and I must say it’s not been that difficult for me. As I said in my previous posts, I think I made the connection in my head. After feeling miserable for at least 7-8 years I think it was time for me to change and now it’s time to become the person I really want to be.
What can I say? I had a great christmas and new years with my family (even though my dad is really sick) and my girlfriend. Over the past 30 days I’ve noticed that nothing is going to be perfect right of the bat but I’m really moving forward with my life. I had very, and I mean very bad motivation problems before this and it’s getting better and better. Currently I’m nowhere near as productive as I think I can be but every day I’m unconsciously improving.
That’s what I’ve changed in the past month:
In the past I wouldn’t touch any book but instead watch a movie or play a game. Now, I actually started reading stuff. I always wanted to do it beforehand but something always held me back. Like this it is in many aspects of my life productivity wise. Slowly but steadily I’ve been implementing habits and things I do into my life. I also starting working out (bodyweight exercises only for now, I’m not interested in lifting weights but rather want to get into Calisthenics)
I have daily „habits“ that I tick every day once they’re done. I use an App for that..there are basically hundreds of Apps that do the job. This includes things like:
- drink 3L of water today
- take your supplements
- clean up your room (I’m currently visiting my parents because of my dads situation)
which are small things that I do daily and that I have to get done every single day.
I also started writing a journal with weekly goals. A current goal for this week (20.01-27.01 is „finish reading book X“ So rather things that I can sort of schedule myself but have to get done within that week and so far it’s working. I also set 3-4 weekly ones. Once that weekly goal is done I mark it green in my journal.
In the future I might add monthly goals rather than weekly ones but for now I stick with weekly.
How am I feeling:
- good amount of energy
- not depressed
- social anxiety less, not gone but so much easier to handle (need to put some focus on it and put me in the situation of facing it)
- motivation for life is back (still slowly but steadily integrating more and more simple daily, but now also weekly goals into my life)
- got an overall better picture of myself (looks, confidence etc.)
I also pretty much say what I want to say now. In the past I often didn’t open my mouth when I didn’t agree on something or rather agreed on it instead of disagreeing to avoid an argument.
Sometimes I still struggle with thoughts like „where is this motivation coming from, am I really changing or do I just think so?“ but at the end of the day I grab the book now and read 20-30 pages instead of not doing it like in the past. Same goes with keeping my room clean etc. I just do it now instead of maybe or not doing it. I stick to my lists which I never did in the past (hundreds of times I tried those lists before..you know how it is guys)
Relationship going great: Girlfriend has been totally into me it’s almost confusing. Haha
To sum it up I guess I can say that I’m progressing in my life. Nothing can ever be perfect but you can strive to build your life in the best possible way and I’m actually doing that now. I don’t rush it. I don’t have to rush and overdo it. Important is that I keep progressing and improving. Most people don’t realize they just have to start doing something and they can actually get the life they want by WORKING HARD for it.
Any questions? Ask below! What have you guys been up to the past 30 days? Have a nice sunday fellow fapstronauts!
I’m 23 years old and was masturbating for at least 7-8 years. This is my first streak. Well, exactly what it says at the beginning. Feeling miserable about everything in my life. Delayed ejaculation with gf, social anxiety, no motivation etc. the usual stuff.
[How’s the DE?] The times I had sex it wasn’t there anymore. 😉
Tldr of [30-day] post: Long distance relationship, gf was about to come over, had problems with delayed ejaculation before, couldn’t finish without my hand etc. I had [a Flatline] myself about 2 weeks in for maybe 5-7 days. I felt amazing and suddenly, when the flatline started it was like I was fapping all day and night. Tired, depressed, literally shrinked penis etc.
Quick update [day 46]:
We had sex quite a few times. No signs of delayed ejaculation anymore. Sometimes a bit longer, sometimes a bit shorter but no signs of me not being able to finish without my own hand or anything – SO WORTH IT. (I still sometimes had the thought during sex, basically pressuring myself which is bad but it worked anyway). I also told her about NoFap and she was happy about it in every aspect. Too lazy to go into detail with it. OPEN UP guys!
When I used to masturbate the usual feeling of guilt and unhappiness came less than a minute after O. When having sex a minute after O I usually still smile and such from the great feeling. It’s a completely different story. You can’t even compare it. Sex with gf/women is a way more intense O anyway than compared to PMO back in the days, at least for me.
If you can’t finish penetrating a girl for 30 minutes straight and she’s just laying there bored, feeling weird because you make her feel like she isn’t good enough (even though she is) and you start pressuring yourself until you stop and use your hand to finish because that’s the only thing you feel, it totally makes sense. By “reversal” I don’t mean a one minute premature ejaculation but rather a fine time of 10-15 minutes on average which is fun for both instead of not being able to finish without your own hand.
Throughout the time being with my girlfriend I didn’t feel like it was a setback. E.g. depression is totally gone out of my life now. When I wake up I feel rather happy than depressed.
A full update/report about other problems (laziness, social anxiety, no energy etc.) I’ll post at 60 days. Keep going everyone and have a nice first month of this year! F* cold here in Germany right now!