It has really been a roller-coaster of emotions, bouncing to and from feeling elated and on top of the world to bitter sadness and heartbreak. I have experienced all the benefits that goes with nofap, feeling ever so confident with girls and everyday social situations. This has been a real highlight of the journey and a major piece missing from my life, however nothing comes without a price, the price of feeding an unhealthy and impaired mindset for years.
I had a crush on a girl before I started this journey. I had built my dreams about her and engraved this incorrect mental image in my mind for almost an year. Soon enough on this journey I started to see the faults in my perception of her and the mistakes in my judgement that I have been making for months. I realised how incompatible we are and don’t want a relationship with her, but the image I have formed has become stronger than I thought. I experience agonising pain due to mismatch between my present and past perceptions, especially when I see her. I know that it will take long before I get over it. So, here I am 2 months in nofap and feeling crushed but I know it’s for the better. All the increased attention from the girls helps but I can’t feel anything for them, I’m too drained at the moment. Gotta keep going forward but this time I know how not to make a same mistake, stick to nofap for good.
I’m 24 and have used porn all through the teenage and less so in my twenties, very occasionally past couple of years but it’s like a drop of oil can contaminate the whole reservoir of water. As for the other benefits, can’t say anything that has not been said before. Clarity of mind is a big one but even that is quite challenging because you notice things you haven’t noticed before which brings more issues to the surface. Also, just being able to live in the moment becomes easier, I don’t constantly think about being somewhere else and doing sth else all the time. Voicing my thoughts has never been so effortless before as well. I could probably go on but as I said can’t think of anything that hasn’t already been said here.
Just wanted to share my experience cuz you all will find somewhere along the way the fruits of the bad seeds planted during PMO. So be prepared for the mental struggle, fortunately physical fitness takes lot less time to recover than the mental one and that will give you a good boost to keep going. Peace brothers.
LINK – Day 63 not your typical success story
by Igroig
Last weekend I got my first girlfriend
It means a lot to me cuz I’m 26 and it’s my first serious relationship. I don’t put it down solely to nofap but it has been a valuable part of the whole thing.
I first tried nofap in December 2015 when I had a crush on a girl. Nothing came out of that except for a major heartbreak but I still recognised value in nofap. I had decent streaks in past few years, I think my first one was just above one year but there was no real progress in my dating life. That’s why I said in the beginning that it’s not solely down to nofap.
Not just that but life took me to some really dark places in past few years. The heartbreak was followed by starting extremely stressful work away from my friends and family, and then sudden death in my family.
I know that hell is real because I got a good glimpse of it and it was scary. Like I said I recognised value in nofap and stuck with it mostly with occasional relapses, because although it did not really gave me a tangible result I knew whatever the solution to my life was it was not fapping. What actually produced dramatic change in my life was going back to spiritual exercises of western esoteric tradition that I used to be interested in in my early twenties. It gave tremendous strength to my personality.
The reason I did not adhere to it first time was lack of discipline on my part. But given the situation I found myself in I was ready to do anything to be happy again. What I want to emphasise is the solution can be different for different people, but it’s likely to lie where you least want to look. Just listen to your heart and do it but maintain the discipline because it is the key to success.
Now that I’ve met my girlfriend I know she is love of my life because I felt instantly at peace with her and there was none of that guilty pleasure type of feeling when you have a crush on someone. I just want to say thank you to all of you and good luck on your journey. The tunnel is dark and lonely but there is light at the end. I promise.
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