I’m 25 years old and I am cured from PIED. I have been for a while now.
Started using at an early age, started with magazines, scenes from movies, etc. Eventually this escalated into video clips online, from there it became a several times a day habit and eventually a full blown addiction. I escalated into weird stuff and didn’t like it, tried to have sex, my penis kept going down so I panicked and googled. Standard.
I spent my teens interacting with women a lot and I think that’s what helped me. I had sex with girls but after reaching 21 my erections REALLY dropped off, then eventually I couldn’t stay hard. I always put this down to drink, since my hook ups were happening after going clubbing and what not. I had no interest in pursuing these women after, either.
Never had a problem with social anxiety or anything, always got on with everybody, was pretty popular in school. Porn really only sapped my work motivation and gave me PIED.
I have been completely PMO free since September 2013. I have a fantastic job, a great body, a beautiful girlfriend and a working penis. Life is good.
It was hard. Very hard but the only way to properly recover is to completely stop porn, masturbation and orgasm. I am adamant about this. I hate to say this because I don’t want to come across as a prick but I see guys on this forum doing “Orgasm reboots” or constantly relapsing and acting like its not a big deal. I agree, you shouldn’t beat yourself up too much over one relapse, but I didn’t relapse once since September 2013 and I’m now completely recovered.
I had sex for the first time around June 2014, erection was 80% at best, but I went for it. It was good. I then began rewiring while having regular sex once or twice a week. This I believe DID actually slow, not stop my progress. (I don’t think sex orgasms after a good no orgasm period can actually STOP progress, just slow it.)
I was basically having too many orgasms, at first I should have stuck to once every 2 weeks, but I was excited to be in a new relationship since 2013, and my girlfriend is gorgeous so resisting was pretty difficult!
I later explained everything to her and she has been extremely supportive. I put off telling her for a few reasons 1) I didn’t know if it was going to work out and 2) Its not something I personally feel comfortable with everyone knowing. But telling her really felt GOOD. You know that saying? “Feels like a weight lifted off my shoulders?” That’s what it felt like. I wasn’t alone anymore.
Gradually my erections got stronger, they were a bit shaky at first I’d occasionally lose my erection for a minute or two and need to go back to making out, then it would return. I could put this down to fear I would lose it. You see when you’ve had ED for a long time there is going to be SOME anxiety still kicking around in your head, like worry you’ll lose your boner yet again. The only real way to get over that is to keep trying.
Gradually erections started lasting, consistent 85% strength, but something still felt a little “off” to me. I wasn’t as hard as I knew I should be. This puzzled me since it had been a long time into recovery and I hadn’t relapsed.
Then I discovered Kegel exercises.
After just two days, my erections were already fuller and thicker, after a week I was like a rock and after a month my penis literally would not go down. It even stays hard after I’ve orgasmed now and my refractory period is about 10 minutes.
So why did this work? I think years of heavy PMO had weakened by PC muscle, so it needed to be worked out again. It can’t be coincidence that literally two days after I start doing Kegels my erections were already harder and stronger, this just kept increasing with time.
I’d post a Kegel routine but I don’t have one, I just flex my pc muscle for as long as I can throughout the day, rest for a while, then do it again. Honestly, I barely do it now, maybe 5 times a week for like a minute and a half and that is maintaining it.
My advice is do 2 days of kegels, a day of complete rest, then 3 days kegels, then a day of complete rest and repeat. Remind yourself. On how to do them, it kind of feels like your balls are doing pull ups and your penis is being sucked in a little bit. Don’t do them when your hard.
There are plenty of topics online about this, if your having trouble locating your pc muscle its the muscle you use when you hold back pee.
KEGELS ARE NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR RECOVERY. You need to recover in you’re brain, then if erections aren’t 100% add in a Kegel routine.
Tidbits of Advice:
Don’t orgasm too soon.
You NEED that rest period from EVERYTHING. 90 days minimum if you started young, orgasms are so connected with porn at first that having one too soon WILL set you back. I KNOW from experience.
Relapses CAN reverse PIED recovery. Before September 2013 I made progress, relapsed and lost some progress in terms of PIED recovery. You’re trying to unwire computer screen = arousal from your brain, if you relapse you are reinforcing that. You have to be strong and vigilant. I’ve been recovering since around Feb 2013, so I spent a lot of time making progress and then relapsing which knocked me back. Not completely, but it still knocks you back.
A binge would reverse everything I think. Whats going to set an alcoholic back? A sip of beer once? Or a weekend bender on Vodka and hard spirits? I see some guys actually putting things like “I’ve only PMO 4 times this month.” If you don’t have PIED that’s fine, but how can you honestly expect to recover if you’re still reinforcing it?
Get out and live your life. You know that vision of how you want your life to be when your recovered? START NOW. Just put this shit in the back of your mind and get out there. Be happy, spend time with friends, work out, get a hobby and meet girls. Spend time around them as often as you can.
I recovered FASTER and had more clarity when I wasn’t reading forums and constantly obsessing over this.
YBOP SELF HYPNOSIS TAPE
Go to YBOP and look for the self hypnosis tape. That is what got me to where I am, seriously. I used it in September 2013 and I haven’t relapsed. I forget how many times I used it but at least for a good two months, 5 nights a week before bed.
IT WORKS TRUST ME. I’m surprised people don’t use it, its absolutely incredible.
REMOVE YOUR COUNTER
This isn’t about going x amount of days or months. Its a lifestyle change. Its good to see progress I admit but you need to change your entire mindset. If your obsessing over days and a counter you’ve already lost. Your never using porn again so why do you need to be reminded when you last used it? Know your start date, the day after you last relapsed and that’s all you need to know. When you feel like checking progress look back but there is no need to constantly remind yourself.
GARY AND MARNIA – If it wasn’t for you two I’d still be a porn addicted mess. Thank you so much for pioneering this, you’ve saved the erections of so many men, including this one.
GABE – For being open, honest and sharing your story. Major inspiration for me.
NOAH CHURCH – Your stand up video made my girlfriend cry! Seriously though, thanks for being so open as well, although I was well onto the road of recovery when I saw your videos, they reinforced a lot of things for me.
FUGU – For the YBOP podcast and for being probably the nicest guy on this forum. I hope your doing good!
In closing I just wanted to say that although this is difficult, it’s hard to get through and a struggle it WILL make you a better man. You’re willpower is like a muscle and this is like a training regime from hell for it, its hard, you’ll battle constantly but in the end you WILL BE STRONGER.
LINK – Completely recovered