I’m a 25 y/o male. I have never experienced any “superpowers”, but recently I was reflecting on how I can see signs of my brain reshaping itself back to “pre-porn”. What I mean is that my instant connection from a thought about porn to needing to use porn is weaker and slower. And that feels pretty awesome. Now that I have a sneak peak of that, I have high hopes for what my brain can do after 90, 180, 365 days, etc. Other than that, I feel a little bit more motivated, I am able to focus more (in general), and I am able to turn away from other little urges that may not be helpful for me (checking Facebook too often, eating unhealthy options, etc).
The Fortify program teaches a helpful technique called STAR – Step back and listen, Take a few deep breaths, Ask yourself what you really want, and Respond in a health way. It sounded so ridiculous at first, but literally walking myself through those steps every time I felt an urge has been very helpful. Over time, I have gotten more natural at approaching urges with that mentality. I think it’s important to sit with the urge, acknowledge it’s presence, and try to maintain clarity of mind while you give yourself the chance to decide what to do. Keep at it! I have given in over and over again 1000’s of times myself.
Gotta share some great news with everyone here. Last Saturday (1 week ago), I hit 6 weeks of hard mode. I have been fighting PMO seriously for 6+ years, and I can’t remember a streak that has been as rewarding. I have been absolutely clean and have not teased or tempted myself once, which is a big step and has obviously been a big help. I have also been extremely diligent – I have a PMO journal that I write in every morning when I wake up, evening when I go to bed, and anytime I get on my laptop at home to work on stuff. I am also following the Fortify program and have been at that almost daily (it’s my second attempt at going through it).
The bigger news it that the next day, I proposed to my girlfriend! And she said yes! It was an amazing day and we are so excited and happy. And that happiness is going to last a million times longer than the good feelings of PMO. W00t.
I’m at 50 days today, with my eyes on 60, and then 90 (and beyond!). But one of the big things I have learned during this streak is to stay very focused on each day. One day at a time.
Keep up the hard work folks. It’s more than worth it.
LINK – 6 week streak + proposal!