Before you guys start huffing and puffing about how you know some alpha-male who watches netflix and plays vidya all day and makes $200k/yr still gets laid- fine. This post is directed at those of you who (like me) recognize you are NOT that person,
and are looking to try a new approach to break your addiction.
I’m 26, and have been watching porn, masturbating, and using internet excessively since age 12 or 13. I recognized these problems around age 18 and have been trying to control or eliminate them ever since. For nearly the past 5 years this effort has been a major, ever-present part of my life. If you are in a similar situation, especially if you are much older than me, think about how much fucking time you have spent worrying about this rather than living your life. Don’t let that get you down- every day is a new day and your past is an old story. The more time you’ve struggled with this problem, the more rewarding it will be to break it. Just don’t wait any longer.
For 5 years I was continuously getting less than 2-3 week streaks of no PMO, with one a year ago at maybe 44 days. That changed when I decided to cut off my personal internet usage a few months ago. I still have mobile internet but use it only rarely, for emails, maps etc. It isn’t nearly as satisfying as browsing on a normal computer which has been the deterrent. If you think doing this would help you break your addiction, isn’t it worth trying for a month? A productive, healthy life unburdened with constant shame means everything to me. Giving up personal internet usage for a few months is a small price to pay. Call up your internet provider and cancel your service.
Try not to use movies, games, or tv shows as an escape from reality. If you are in school, use school computers for schoolwork or other career-related projects (use work computers too, if you’re allowed). Battling PMO addiction was so much easier without the temptation of the internet. I can remember at least 5 times in the 90 days when I am certain I would have relapsed if home internet was readily available to me. In getting over an internet addiction You may have some lonely, anxious days with lots of nail-biting, but that’s going to happen as you battle your PMO addiction anyways. So story short- If you are like me, if you are fucking worn out from the constant relapsing and constant worrying about your addiction I totally suggest cutting yourself off from the internet. At least, if you THINK it might help you, just try it.
So what’s it like after the 90 days? Fucking great. A whole new plane of existence. The feeling of being able to work on other parts of your life that you were never able to because you hadn’t yet gotten over a teenage fixation, or in the case of excessive internet usage, didn’t have the time. I had my first wet dream ever at day 85. Having a wet dream, for the first time at age 26? I don’t remember everything from sex-ed but I know that’s not normal. Morning wood started happening again sometime in the second or third month, and is sort of hit or miss, though still a sensation I didn’t have since age maybe 14.
The “superpowers” may or may not happen. There are clumps of days when it feels like every interaction is great and the “superpowers” feel very real- I flirt way more and women flirt way more. However there are still days when I feel just as anxious or awkward as ever. Many times in the 90 days I have found myself unusually irritated or frustrated. I have still had gut-wrenching failures with women, in fact more than before probably because I’m putting myself out there more.
It’s just not the same. You can take pride in knowing that you are making better for your life, and that in every new day you aren’t feeling ashamed in secretly masturbating to things you don’t want anyone to know about. Even in the bad days, it’s like there’s a current that’s constantly getting stronger and pulling and pushing you in the right direction. If you get caught up on stuff, you are still headed in the right direction. Don’t fret.
To be clear, I actually did have sex twice in the 90 days but did not use porn or masturbate. I think you might get a stronger effect by not having any orgasms at all in the 90 days, but who are we kidding if someone you really like wants to have sex you probably shouldn’t turn that down. Anyways, don’t do it for the sex. Do it for your life; the sex will happen as you clean up your life. The struggle of overcoming the addiction will make you a better person but you still need to muster up the courage to take chances. Take lots of chances with your new-found extra time and extra energy. Life can change really quickly, just help it along. Good luck!