I am completing one year without porn and I decided to write this post to show you how my life improved, and somehow to thank this amazing community that I owe so much, and give strength and hope to everyone struggling right now.
First i am gonna give a retrospect of how my life was one year ago. there I was, 25 years old, virgin, fat (110kg/242lbs), sitting on my butt playing videogames all day long, getting my major in electrical engineering. I went for college to this amazing city in Brazil (yes, i’m brazilian) where parties go on 24/7 and it’s really likely to get lucky, and still I was able make it out as a virgin. and it was not because i was some kind of geek that would not go out ever, I had a really amazing group of friends and we used to not miss a single party, they knew I was shy when talking to girls and they were really supportive,
but despite everything they tried to help me i would only find out later that my biggest problem was PORN. i actually had 2 frustrated sexual experiences during that time, but i thought that my social anxiety and nervousness were the reason for not getting hard, which pushed me back for more porn.
So i graduated and moved back to my home town, i was miserable and jobless, I didn’t have my friends with me anymore. so I was on 31/08/2014 browsing on youtube after a dota2 match and I crossed by this TEDx talk about pornography, and it was when I realized that that was it, and at that point i decided to ban porn from my life forever.
I dont even have to tell you how difficult the first month was, i had A LOT of anxiety, flu-like symptoms, need to piss every 30 minutes and so on, I relapsed twice after reaching the 1 month mark, but not watching porn, just because i was so nervous that my dick would never start working again because of the flatline,
i was starting to have second thoughts on my sexual preference, it was really hard, and after reading a lot on nofap and YBOP i compromised myself to go on a 3 hard mode month. i just focused on making myself a better person and tried to ignore the flatline, i joined a BJJ class (one of the best decision i ever had after quiting porn), started working out and getting fit, took cold showers twice a day, meditated for 30 minutes everyday (i really recommend this),
in other words: i did everything i could in order to go through that, and results started to happen. i noticed girls were getting interested in me, and realized all those good opportunities i missed during my college time (i cant regret what was already done), my confidence level was going up and up.
I dont want to make this an even longer post, so long story short, i had sex for the first time in my life, it was with this girl, she is 29 and i was a 25-year old virgin, i was literally shaking, but i had to face it, and i did it, one of the best day of my life, if not the best.
so, here I am today, 90kg/198lbs with 10% bodyfat (i go out with girls and they say im hot haha), i started a dancing class (forró) which is great to get to know girls, and my life has never been better.
dont get me wrong, im not trying to promote myself, i still have a lot more to improve and i really worked hard to achieve everything, and if i could do it, i know you can! i dont think nofap is a magical solution, but what it did to me was opening the doors i needed to change my life for good.
so i want to once again thank this amazing community, and give you my best wishes on your journey, i hope i can help you sharing my story! (and sorry if i had any mistakes, im not a good writer even in portuguese, my first language, i hope you understood everything) 🙂
LINK – one year porn free