I have something for you here, and I think you might like it. It’s inspiration. First of all, let me introduce myself so that you can get the background needed to follow this text: I’m a 27 years old guy who recently realized he was addicted to pornography and masturbation, and fought and won a battle to enhance his life experience by eliminating that bad habits. My life changed, and I honestly believe that quitting PMO is at the foundations of that transformation. It took my a while to post here, because I wanted to be sure about those changes (specially concerning stability).
But in the end I felt like I owed inspiration to this community, since it was very helpful to me throughout the process. There goes my story… (sorry for any English mistakes, it’s not my native language).
It’s not easy to rationalize what’s wrong with your life when you don’t feel right. I see now what I was doing wrong, but at my times of suffering I didn’t have this clarity. You see, Ever since puberty kicked off I was unsatisfied with my life. I wasn’t as shy as most of you probably are, given the posts I read here, but I was not happy. I used to hang out with the popular guys and girls of my school/college, but mostly as a “nice guy satellite” kind of guy. And I didn’t like it. Although outside I made it appear like I was doing fine, but inside I felt insecure, afraid, tired, sad, always coming short of what I thought it was ideal. And although I’m a highly educated guy (I’m a doctor) I couldn’t figure out why I felt like shit most of the days, and more important, how to heal myself. I had my times with the ladies, but I must say I suffered from erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation (most of my sexual encounters were unsatisfying for me because of that).
I believe the first time in my life that I perceived the power of NoFap (actually, the power draining of fapping to porn, but we’ll get to that later) was a random moment when I was about 20 y/o, when by a chain of events I didn’t fap for about 15 days. I didn’t see then, but I now understand why I felt like a superman during the last 5 days of that streak. I felt confident, positive, emotionally unattached to outcomes (results that magically appear when you let go of them), and all of the other “superpowers” that come with NoFap witch I’m sure you read about already.
Then I got back to PMO, and my life came back to chaos.
Then I found about “Your Brain on Porn” while surfing 9gag, and after I watched it I decided to give it a try. I wasn’t very enthusiastic at the time, because I had tried a lot of things to improve my life, and couldn’t make it right, but I took a shot anyway. Of course you know, at the end of the 15/20 days of NoFap I was God himself again. So, having now the theoretical knowledge to understand why, I saw what had happened before.
This post isn’t about teaching how to do it, because it would make a really big text, it’s more about showing you that PMO is a life sucking activity, such as alcohol or drugs. I don’t think quitting PMO is becoming superman, I see it as removing the kryptonite (saw that in another post, credits to whoever wrote it).
I don’t know for how long I haven’t fapped/watched porn now, but certainly for more than the classic 90 days. To be honest it’s been probably more than 6 months. On this time, I started working out (so now not only my body looks better, but feels better), have been studying a lot more, working a lot more efficiently (since I can concentrate and am not that big pile of tired meat and bones), and I’m feeling good as I never thought I would.
One more thing that deserves special consideration. I’m now dating the girl of my dreams. I’m not exaggerating, she is a gorgeous girl I had an intense crush for the last two years or so, and she is now my girl, and I can see in her eyes and in the things she does that she is as in love with me as I’m with her, and guys, let me say it: this is a priceless feeling. I got back on track on my sex life, meaning I don’t suffer from ED or PE anymore, and consequently I’m not afraid of girls/sex anymore. I’m enjoying that relationship to its fullest and I think that is worth the hell you go through when you start NoFap.
I think PMO cuts you short of your full potential. I don’t think it’s a miracle solution to all of your problems, but I see it as a chain. You got a lot of problems, and they form a chain. Once you cut loose of one ring it’s easier to cut the others. For instance, I didn’t have the stamina to work out, and, because I cut PMO, I felt that energy coming back and started doing it. After a few months doing it, I looked better and felt better about myself, which gave me the self confidence to approach sexually the girl I really wanted in a proper way. Did NoFap solved my relationship problems? No! But it led to it indirectly. I believe that if you cut any ring of that “chain of feeling bad” it will help you improve on the others, but PMO is a big one. (I’m positively sure I wasn’t clear expressing it, but damn, it’s everything so clear in my head now, and still it’s really, really hard to put it on words).
Anyhow, it’s a big thread already, and I realized here that it’s harder than I thought to put it in written form, but I think it might help some of you at least a little.
Again, sorry if the English is not perfect. If anybody would like to ask something more specific about my journey I’d be more than happy to detail it a little.
Keep pushing it.
by Another Guy