Well, I had sex on day 68.
I have to say I was expecting a bit more but I havent felt like that “in the moment” for long time. And also my ED has disappeared and my little guy was as rock all the time and it takes a long time to ejaculate, which was very surprising for me.
It wasnt planned, we just ended up in my flat with friend of mine and she was all the time trying her tricks on me – she never did this before. We have been friends for long time and it has been always kind of sexy atmosphere between us but yesterday she was just so horny and I was trying to abstain for a long time but then I said : “Well, why not, lets give it a try”.
My question goes to this.
Do you think my achievement is all gone? I mean I havent been PMO´d for 68 days and do you think my power (which I definitely felt last few days as my flatline ended) has disappeared? I feel bit different now, not so confident, but maybe it ll go up in few days again.
What do you guys think?
LINK – Sex on day 68
I am 28 years old guy. I have been PMO since I was 13??? maybe 12 . It started to be real addiction couple of years ago, I´d say 6 years. Last 4 years it was really bad. But I had not noticed anything wrong with me everysince my body told me to do something with it (after a day spend mostly on PMO). I realised couple months ago that PMO couple times a day, in a car, at work or while my gf is having a bath is not normal. So I have started to google up if there are some guy having the same problem. And obviously there are. Which helped me a lot with my decision and cure procedure.
Well to be honest i started on the 22nd of February and eversince I relapsed once after 10 days and before (7th day) I had sex with my gf who knows about my problem and she is being very supportive. It was so akward to tell her…but we set the rules up and she is ok with that.
Do I fell better after few days with nofap? I have to say i definitely do!!! It has not been easy and I am just in the beggining but I have to say even after 2 days I realised that I can concentrate to my work better. It costs me banch of energy to avoid being on porn web pages or stalking girls on fb or other. After K9 instalation it is quite easy to resist. On the other hand, I had to stay at home on Monday and the feeling to PMO was so f-strong… that I relapsed.
I could have written a very long story though…many things on my mind. I decided to join this community – all the information I had gone through helped with this cure that I like very much so far! The most thing I like is the feeling of self confidence what getting now…
UPDATE – FIRE analogy – 90 days
I remember myself on the very beginning of this journey, that if i hit the 90 days milestone I will be the happiest person on the world, expecting some irresistible power, having dozens of hot girls constantly behind my back.
Nothing of this happened. I had a “airport day” today and as I was browsing airport shops and relaxing my tired body (you know from all this sitting ) I came up with interesting analogy what happened in my body after 90 days.
I have discovered that I was addicted in the spring 2014. That time I was in RS with wonderful girl. I tried to overcome this disease but I wasn’t able. And why? Because I didnt have any reason to change my life. It was very comfortable, when something was bothering me (my girl was – because she was not enough good in contrast with novelty girls on web) I simple went for fapping.
Spring 2015 – our RS ended with very very very bad consequences. I never felt so vulnerable liek this time. Typical example of collapsing RS nowadays. I dont talk about that anymore but just to know that I was really realy down. Almost half a year. Of course my solution was – FAP! Which actually made me very pathetic and i felt like i have nothing to do on this planet anymore.
Late summer – I decided and I saw that FAP making my moods worse and I made a decision. I tried something like 5days, then go fucking back like crazy.
25th October – I was standing in front of Taxus tree to tear some of the needles to finish it (cup of tea from 100g and you are on the other side..). I almost did but obviously I didn’t – I don’t know why I did this I don’t remember cause something deeper in me took responsibility for my life.
Autumn 2015 – first 20 days was like heaven. I noticed a girls on the street they noticed me. I started to work out (well from September..). I started to look for some books i would like…I also experienced huge flatline – days 25 to 50 (many of you helped me that time again, I was about to committed suicide, yes another one)
X-mas 2015. Terrible, it was terrible my memories and self-pity was tearing apart. Worst days beside flatline. Then I discover self-help books. Never believed that’s something like that could help me. You know what, 10 years ago i was reading al hell but i guess also because of FAP i stopped and wasn’t able to evolved anymore.. Was too lazy…probably.
Begging of 2016 – new year, I said new opportunity, new grip! And really things started to go differently. I have started to think differently and that’s been greatest change in my life. I am still learning to do that but things from Napoleon Hill, Marcus Aurelius, Epiktetos, The Slight Edge.. and other good books or even only thoughts are incredible cause it really work. But that’s a different story.
I like to tell you here my conclusion of 90 days and finally describe fire analogy.
I think that naturally we have a fireplace inside of us. And the fire works as a engine for everything we want to accomplish in our lives and what gives us energy to be the man we deep inside want to be. But with fapping we pour water inside the fire so it works as extinguisher. Once we stop FAP we ignite a spark. On our way we are putting a larger and larger wood pieces to the fire so it grows. I think my fire is after 90 days in size of normal fire, average size that i can work with towards some other things. I would say this is a basic type of fire that everyone should start with. The energy from the fire feeds everything in your life – sport, art, relationships….everything. I don’t stop here, I will put more and more woods so the fire is bigger…
I don’t know I feel like that, I really feel energy inside of me and it usually goes with “i don’t give a fuck” in a good way, like I am not a scary boy – what they say if I do that, what if I do something else that everyone is expecting from me… you know, fuck it, I have my own life and only I know the best to live it, period!
– I quit with facebook – great relief
– my voice is definitely deeper – sometimes I don’t even recognize myself
– my connectivity with people has grown up
– I spend more time with my family
– looking into girls eyes feels amazing
– I speak slower
– I am definitely more confident – it’s the feeling
– I use modern technologies only when i NEED
– read a book a week – read instead of checking my emails on cell phone
– greater posture for sure
– have been doing cold showers for a month and feel amazing
– less sweating
– more courageous
– I don’t so much attention to the things anymore (I don’t need that new gadget, iphone etc.) – i know the greatest thing on the world is inside of us!!!
Well I didn’t become a pick-up monster of chick magnet but my life has improved that’s for sure.
I think 90days is just beginning like the first step out of your comfort zone!
If anything, I am here for you guys, go ahead and ask whatever you want
Hail to the NoFap!!