Age 29 – Things that used to require will power don’t anymore

This is a repost from my age group, 25-29yrs: 90 days!!!!!!!!!

  1. Am I recovered? Possibly, let me explain below.
  2. Have I seen benefits? YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s bittersweet. I know I am “not recovered” because my libido has not come back yet, and that I have moments of superpower but not 24/7 superpower. Seeing and interacting with women does not induce any sort of reaction toward my libido yet. I had a thought the other day that the first 90 day is merely DETOX, and from 90 day onward is where recovery begins. It wasn’t until day 85 that my subconscious mind went auto-pilot. What I mean is that things that used to require will power doesn’t anymore:

  • I go to the gym without thinking
  • I take cold showers without thinking
  • I quit smoking without thinking
  • Eating healthy is not a struggle at all
  • I wake up naturally without alarm clock
  • I naturally chat up with female co-workers without thinking . BUT, I have not gone out to a bar or a nightclub yet since my disaster at day 61. And right now I am afraid if I go to ‘test’ my confidence that it will be another horrible night: therefore this is why I think I am not recovered yet)
  • I naturally socialize with everyone without thinking

Simpy stated: the only willpower you need muster is the urge to not PMO. And if you can do that for 90 days, you WILL BE REWARDED WITH AUTO-PILOT, meaning that success gravitates toward you and you don’t even need to try (because trying implies mustering will power), you simply just extend your hand out to RECEIVE. And let me say this, the 90 days is totally worth it (DUH). In fact it is only 60 days of hell, 30 days of mellow/tolerable withdrawals. This is very very short compare to the next 60 years of your life!

On the other hand, academic research shows that it takes 6-12 weeks to fully quit smoking. Meaning that IF I am actually cure of no PMO, my nicotine withdrawal is hindering my brain’s ability to enjoy the reward. I need to wait until the end of September to reap the FULL reward of nofap AND no smoke. What I hope by then is 24/7 superpower and a lot more attention from women, but if that has to wait for another 3, 6, or even 9 months, I can most definitely do it!

I still miss my ex… so that kind of sucks. Fortunately I have a “barrage” of female co-workers and co-workers in general to keep my emotional stability in check.

The withdrawals are GONE, if you look at my first post I have listed what they were. The only withdrawals I get is lethargy every now and then, but I believe it is because I am in the middle of quitting smoking. I rarely feel depressed, I don’t even remember the last time I felt depressed, like 15-20 days ago?!?!

The most significant and truly unexpected benefit is that my mind and body is running auto-pilot. The fact that I just go and do things without having to try feels amazing. I feel like I am living in the present, I do not think about the past as often, and I do not thinking about the future as often. I feel like a human being, and not just a mindless organic machine that work, eat, shit, and sleep.

LINK – consuela’s 90 day report

BY – consuela


 

INITIAL POST – consuela’s journal

Hi everyone,

Today is my day 32 of no PMO and I decided to register and join the forum so I can give and receive support from everyone. This is also the longest I have went without PMO since I was 15 yrs old (I did have sex with my girlfriend once in this period).

A little about me: I am 29 and have PMO since I was 15. Much like everyone else, it started off light (M every two days, not too extreme P), and ended up with PMO almost everyday. My addiction have ruined my relationship with my girlfriend; things are very rocky and though we have not officially broken up, I am sure we are done.

I would like to share my 32 days of nofap as a way to vent and also to encourage all of you.

The first week was tough, really tough. I  basically had all the withdrawal symptoms listed, if not more:
– physically sick, I always feel like I need to puke, but nothing ever comes up
– HEAVY HEAVY brain fog, anxiety, and depression
– lethargy and apathy
– life basically SUCKED (it still does but less)
– at no time in the first week did I have the cravings to PMO, because I made up my mind that I will never ever do it again. I believe there is a difference between abstaining and quitting!   

Starting in week two and up to now is the flatline. I don’t know how to describe it other than withdrawal symptoms that are more mellow, minus the physical sickness. Over time I can feel that it becomes less and less intense; but nonetheless it is there 24/7. Once in a while I will have a 1-2 hours of window where I feel GREAT, I would talk with everyone and keep solid eye contact with them.

Even though I am only in day 32 of my nofap, I am already seeing some benefits:
– more energy, but I can’t seem to find the motivation to do things that will fill in the gap of what would otherwise be me sleeping and fapping
– as a 29 yr old who has lived with this parents his whole life, I have recently bought a car for the first time (a used 2003 explorer) and I am deciding to move out of my house to live on my own
– within that window of feeling great, I would be very social and I hold eye contact with everyone I speak to
– as mention above, I do not crave for any PMO. However I am having a hard time not fantasizing to my girlfriend, I need to find a way to stop doing it. I know for a fact that is my brain’s subtle way of testing to see if my penis still works. It does and I know it is not dead but my brain is winning the fantasy game for now.

I can’t wait till I reach 90 days; not because so I can PMO again, but because I am hoping that I am cured by then so I can live the life I’ve always wanted. Also, I hope and I can’t wait to get these superpowers and attention from women that people are talking about. I know that this shouldnt be the focus of my nofap, I’m sorry to say but it is the sole driving force of why I am doing this.

BTW, I am taking advantage of the 1-2 hr of window of not-flatlining to type this up! Weirdly enough, my mind doesn’t know how to respond to it. I am so used to living life in the flatline that when I am not in it it just feels sooo weird, its like I miss flatlining. I hope this will change soon!

I have a harder time quitting smoking, because as mention above, I am currently abstaining from smoking, and not actually quitting for real. It sucks…. I hope I can be smoke free one day, and soon.

I will report back on day 45.