Today marks one year since I stopped masturbating. I started when I was sixteen and quit when I was 58. For most of those years I masturbated on a daily basis, sometimes more than once, even while married and/or involved in healthy sexual relationships. But at some point along the line I realized I was addicted and could not fight the urge. I watched porn often and became densensitized by it.
Eventually I developed erectile dysfunction that none of the ED pills could help with. In the later years I would often schedule time to watch porn online and masturbate so vigorously that sometimes it hurt. I hated what I had become.
Then one day it all came to a head. I masturbated myself so hard that I seriously hurt myself. I was in crippling pain. After several days I went to a doctor. Although there was no permanent damage, I had seriously strained muscles and my epididymis was inflamed.
I was prescribed medication and realized that I was not going to be able to masturbate for awhile. As I was recovering a funny thing happened. I just decided that I would NOT masturbate again. That’s right, cold turkey, I stopped. I didn’t enjoy it anymore and now it had cost me dearly. One year later I do not think of it, I do not feel the urge and I feel much better about myself.
Kicking the fap habit has also given me the confidence to quit alcohol and lose weight.
But something I found interesting is that for the first six months after quitting I still watched porn, I just didn’t touch myself. I was still somehow addicted to the image of sexual acts. With time that faded too. It all just began to look stupid and uninteresting. Not to mention how degrading it is to so many beautiful people. I would like to say my erectile dysfunction is gone, but unfortunately it isn’t. That may be a lasting legacy that I will just have to deal with.
If there is any moral to my story it would be to beat this thing before it beats you.
LINK – It’s been one year