I feel like a totally new person…Like I was living in someone else’s skin my WHOLE life and now I’m free


How I found NoFap: I was randomly surfing the internet for a movie which I saw when I was a kid and for some reason my search led me to Nofap (btw it wasn’t an adult movie, it was some movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger). At first, I was like “wow they are really serious about this”, I was shocked by how serious of an addiction the contributors made PMO seem. My whole life I never saw PMO as an addiction, especially since it has been advertised all over the media as a “healthy stress reliever”.

When did I start PMO: I started at age 11, I found an adult vhs tape which my parents had been hiding (Note: Always make sure to lock stuff up when you have kids cuz they will always find it). While watching the tape, I noticed a man MO-ing while watching a lady tease him as they did back then when they had storylines in adult movies, and I thought to myself “what is that that he’s doing, I gotta try that out”..and the rest was history. Fast forward a decade and some years later, I had been PMO-ing pretty much everyday since.

Present Year: So far I never thought of my PMO habits as an addiction…hell I thought it was normal since I had a girlfriend and everyone else seems to be doing it. It wasn’t until I started reading these NoFap threads that I realized that what I was doing was having a bad effect on my life. While reading these threads I started to notice that I too was going through the same issues as most people on here complained about (the depression, desensitization, low self esteem, and insecurity). Soon I started to ask myself “could PMO really have that big of an effect on my life??”

So I decided to give NoFap a try. My first attempt at NoFap lasted 30 days, it was the most stressful thing I’ve ever had to do, I thought I was gonna lose my mind!!. I couldn’t help it, so I gave up and gave into temptation. (Note: the craziest thing I noticed about an addiction is the fact that if you try to quit and you happen to relapse, you will become twice the addict that you once were) Believe me, I used to PMO maybe two or three times a day before I made my first attempt at NoFap, after I relapsed, it escalated to six times a day (I counted)..three times became an easy feat.

Months go by and then one day while watching a documentary about drug addicts I realized that I shared the same characteristics as drug addicts in terms of the way their addiction affects them. My whole life I had always looked down on drug addicts basically saying “they did it to themselves” just to find out that I am just like them except that my issue is not with drugs and my issue is kinda accepted by society. This realization gave me the courage to start my second attempt.

Second Attempt: So far I am over 100 days (I’ve stopped counting) and I can already see results.

  1. My mood is always positive nowadays 
  2. I try to make conversation with people now instead of hiding away from society
  3. My focus and work has improved tremendously
  4. I’ve started eating healthy and sleeping well (Don’t know if this has anything to do with it)
  5. I noticed that people approach me more now than before. I don’t know if they’ve noticed a change in me or not. 
  6. I feel like a totally new person…Like I was living in someone else’s skin my WHOLE life and now I’m free.

How did I do it: The first 30 days are gonna be the toughest days of your life. This is because you’re gonna have so much free time that the temptation to just PMO is gonna drive you crazy. Then you’re gonna get the wet dreams (this hasn’t stopped for me yet). Next, you’re gonna get what ppl call “blue balls”…I thought this was a silly joke till it happened to me. If you can survive through these phases, the rest will be easy. So far I have been able to survive them and now the urges to PMO have gotten weaker. However, once in a while they come back strong with a vengeance and these are the steps I usually take to combat them.

  1. I go take a piss in the restroom. (For some reason the urge to PMO is stronger when I have to pee) Once I take a piss, the urge is down to 70%
  2. Then I log into Reddit on my phone and read other people’s success stories like this and use it to remind myself of all the benefits I’ve gained from my second attempt and how I do not wanna go back to the person I used to be. (Urge is down to 20%, the stories make a big impact on my urge)
  3. I log into YouTube and watch videos of addicts and note to myself that I am strong and will not end up like a drug addict. (Urge is gone, I’m back to normal)

So there it is. After a decade and some years I believe that I am finally strong enough to beat this and put this behind me. I want to personally thank each and everyone of you contributors because your stories helped me get through 100 days and counting. Even though I never believed in therapists and will never visit one, I finally understand why they make people talk to others about their issues, because seeing one person succeed motivates you to work harder. I hope my story will help someone get through the challenge. If I can do it after my years of “experience” I believe you can too.

LINK – Please Read: 100 days and counting

by topcontender