Since I knew youbrainonporn I never imagine writing a comment, but the things that happened with me recently made me change my mind and, above all this, made me grateful for all this knowledge that this website brought to me. So, this is my sincerely thankful.
I have been addicted to PMO for a long time (something about 10 years). I never had ED, but the effects of addiction were really present on me. Maybe because I had not ED I didn’t realize the addiction, but it was there.
All this time I had a girlfriend and, for the last three years, we are married.
On June,15 of 2015 I decided not to watch porn anymore, because it was bothering me. I felt ashamed with my conduct. For a time I was not liking PMO anymore. I really believed that PMO was tracking my life down. So, that day I started my rebooting.
In fact, I did stop porn immediately but I couldn’t stop totally masturbation. I just could reduce masturbation to once or twice a week. But I thought that I should do the best I could do and I didn’t gave up.
All this year with no porn wasn’t easy. But after 90 days, I started to feel better. After 6 months I can say that I didn’t thought about it anymore. I am no saying that porn didn’t had any affect on me anymore, but I was able to direct my thoughts to other things instead of porn. My efforts started showing results. If I didn’t wanted, porn was not a part of my life anymore.
After this year masturbation was still going but I could already reduce for once a week. On June, 15 of 2016 once a week masturbation was my best mark.
Then I decide to stop masturbation. On August, 9 of 2016 I stopped masturbation. It have been 150 days now.
After this last step (stop masturbation) I rediscovered my wife. At this time she was already thinking in divorce and I didn’t realized that. And she was right. All this time I was cold, boring, didn’t want to do dance with her, didn’t want to admire her, didn’t want to take care of her, didn’t want to make silly stuff for her.
In my point of view, the worst thing about PMO addiction is that you stop feeling things. The addiction suppress your genesic energy that you should spend on love and affection with the other people, specially those around you. I now discovered silliness. And I am totally silly about my wife. I want to do everything different. I am anxious to show her what I can be. I will save my marriage because of this. We are happy. I am happy.
I won’t masturbate anymore and I think I am starting too understand how boring is to do alone something you should do with the person you love. It is some kind of selfish behavior that enclosure you in a prison without feelings and truly joy.
And I just can feel this today because I can use this genesic energy to really feel the affection and love. I think I am more active too.
I’m glad for everything and I’m glad to God for giving me time for try to change that.
If you are trying to stop PMO, don’t give up. It isn’t easy. But the life after that is awesome.
LINK – Life is good after rebooting
By Carl_M
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