So here I am, at the end of my 90-day challenge, which proved to be a very lengthy journey of self-control and self-restraint. It has been a very interesting three months, filled with ups and downs and several unforgiving and turbulent personal struggles, but somehow I managed to keep the streak alive and managed to reach my goal of 90 days.
It’s with this level of hindsight, towards the ups and downs of this journey, that I’m writing this post; to help newcomers who might wish to try this challenge; to motivate current NoFappers attempting to finish their journey, and to reminisce with current long-term NoFappers on the trails and tribulations of this journey.
Many people speak about NoFap as if it is a miracle. As if taking on this challenge and journey shall magically change your life for the better; like some Cinderella-like super potion, that will make your dreams come true. I’m here to tell you, that unfortunately, it’s not.
NoFap is a journey of self-understanding; a journey that has no directions, apart from inward.
Many will tell you that taking up NoFap will give you superpowers; that taking on this challenge will raise your confidence and will make women run after you; that becoming a NoFapper will get you laid more often and that committing to such a challenge shall make you successful and that all your dreams will start to become a reality. Once again, I’m here to tell you, that unfortunately, this isn’t the truth.
I started NoFap as an experiment. I felt I was slowly depending on pornography as a method of ‘release’, especially when days got extremely stressful and anxiety & workloads were running high. Every time I was in the commodity of my bedroom and received an erection, I would find myself subconsciously opening an incognito tab on Chrome, grabbing the handy roll of toilet paper I kept by my laptop, and I would fap away until I would feel my stress, anxiety, fears and worries float away with minimal climax caused by artificial ejaculation.
Only, they didn’t.
Masturbation never aided me in facing the key problems in my life; it merely blinded from them. Masturbation, like any dopamine-based drug, works as a positive distraction from the worries of ‘the now’, creating an entirely artificial sense of satisfaction with the lives we are living. This addiction to an artificial facade is one of the key issues surrounding porn addiction and compulsive masturbation; we end up content with our lives, even if that level of content is artificially generated by a computer screen. Afterall, genetic replication is the primary biological function of all organisms, and ejaculation (or sex) is the only way you’re getting that done. Replicating such a primal and fundamental biological function, in a repetitive, compulsive and artificial way is bound to have consequences.
And this is exactly where the benefits of NoFap lay.
NoFap isn’t about gaining ‘superpowers’ or ‘becoming alpha’ or ‘scoring women’. NoFap is all about self-discipline.
When starting NoFap, you are basically committing to reversing all the bad mindsets, habits and addictions that developed over the years. You are committing to removing a negative part of yourself, even though it is hard. You’re committing to straying away from drives or cravings that are so primal that they may give you withdrawal symptoms, and that requires discipline.
This discipline is the true superpower behind NoFap; because stopping masturbation is only the first step. Before you know it, this strong will-power, determination and love for the uncomfortable will begin seeping into several different segments of your life, and you’re suddenly working out, keeping the house clean, going on dates and performing well in work. This happens not because you were suddenly gifted by some spider-bite with powers you’ve never had, but rather because you woke up from the artificial trance you put yourself under and decided to deal with the problems you’ve been avoiding whilst learning how to not give in to temporary temptation or cravings.
Friends, Pornography is a commodity, but everything it has to offer is false. Some may be happy living a life based on an artificial lie; after all a comfortable lie may seem easier to deal with over an uncomfortable truth. Yet, if you are a person who prefers to wake up every morning to pilot your own life, I swear to you, taking a step towards the uncomfortable shall be the first step of a very successful journey, and it can start today. All you need to do is make a very honest decision with yourself, based on one simple question:
“Who do you want to be?”
It’s all plain sailing from there.