Last year I was a hopeless fat ugly piece of shit who had no social skills and took everything for granted. But a bit over 365 days ago I found out about NoFap, and a lot has changed since then. I’d proceed to tell you about the attraction, the new friends, all the grades I never got until this year, and all the repeated generic stories but that’s not the point.
The real thing is, in these 365 days I have found myself at a certain peace. I am able to be myself much more easily than ever, and I’m always adapting and finding new things. My music taste hasn’t changed, but grown. I went from only listening to mainstream rap to just this week picking a new fancy for singer songwriter style music(Pure Comedy and 70’s Bowie, ye catch me?) I find myself enjoying much more obscure media, like memes that I never would’ve considered because they don’t “fit a format”. In fact, I started making some myself(truly sad right). I am able to pull myself out of situations and look at things objectively, knowing what to say and why to say it, and knowing what to feel when, and while that does mean I don’t get sad easily, I don’t feel that happy easily either.
I’m in a neutral state, a blissful state. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have the drive to succeed. A lot of people look up to me now. In fact, this guy in my school in 10th grade said he wants to be just like me when he’s about to graduate. I told him for that he needs to be himself. I’ve started reading more books(but not as many as I’d like to TBH). Most people tell me that even if I look good I have personality that’s able to speak volumes above it. They’re always telling me how I can get very immature when I joke, and be very mature and understanding when they require.
And I think that’s the main thing about NoFao, and something I feel this sub misses the point of. While I haven’t posted here in a long time, I can’t deny, most people just focus on not fapping. That doesn’t work. And your goals, while always at the utmost importance, don’t always excite your mind. So why not spend that time you’re bored expanding your hobbies. Think of the things you like, and try branching off of that. You like rap, try some experimental rap. You like reading teenage drama novels, try reading a more adult book, find recommendations online(I spend a lot of time online still but it’s not of Facebook or Instagram, rather on websites like Reddit and, controversial, 4chan too. They have porn ads there, so beware. I use them because I always stumble across something new). You always liked watching a sport, maybe go for a live event, or better yet, go play it yourself. See how you fare.
But never stop growing. You don’t even have to grow the same way I did, get recommendations from YouTube reviewers if you like(most content is generated based on what you previously liked, so avoid it, but try finding critics who review a vast array of genres in anything, not just a small window), or make paintings instead of memes, but do something. Grow in all directions, try cracking a different type of joke around your friends. Do that the next time you feel an urge. Try something new at McDonalds, something that small can make a big difference, try cracking a joke with someone you’re meant to be “serious” with. Overcome your fear of dogs by walking by a stray dog when you see one.
This is one hell of a rant but I needed to say this. Don’t focus on not fapping, you’ll crash and burn in a month like that. Focus on growing in all directions, not just work, not just hobbies, not just in personality, in every one of those. To be yourself, you need to know yourself first. And to know yourself, you should never stop pushing yourself to a new limit. And trust me, you’ll be able to just pull people into your new found quirks pretty easily too. They’ll want to do what you want to do. Don’t fear being alone because you don’t like what everyone else does. Keep growing naturally and without influence.
Happy New Year and thanks for sticking out for me back when I needed it(most were so back in the day I deleted them lmao) and have a great year ahead, and good luck for whatever you set your mind to, just not for not fapping. Because that’s where we go wrong!
EDIT: Don’t let this exploration take your entire day either. It should be a minority of your day, but it needs to be there.
Worst part is I hate being 17 I’ll be 18 this year so I’ll have waaaay more freedom to explore newer shit, maybe do something physically requiring me to be present. I hope if I am able to cross 95% in my finals I’ll get into a good college and then that shit will be easier to do.