So I started nofap on the 22nd of February and have masturbated once during this period when I was feeling incredibly low at the start of April. Along the journey I have had a number of wet dreams which I have possibly slowed my progress.
I think its crucial that when you start nofap you must reasonable expectations and are motivated by meaningful things. For instance, i heard about superficial things like female attraction and the other so called “superpowers”, and being an open-minded (maybe gullible also), I believed these things would happen to me. I’m not gonna speak on behalf of everybody but for me, i haven’t experienced these benefits and for the first 6/7 weeks my anxiety and depression were sky high because my expectations were so unreasonably high. This resulted in me recently relapsing. Thankfully i have an amazing support network around me and for the first time in over a year i feel genuinely happy and i don’t feel that i need to rely on external validation to be positive.
For me, to get to this point self-acceptance is super important. For the first 6/7 weeks, I cared about dumb superficial things like a tiny aspect of my appearance that very few people even notice and I think it’s crucial to accept the body that God gave you and bet happy with that. Also, meditation has slowed my mind down and help me control intrusive thoughts and prevent overthinking everything. For me finding the balance between self-love and personal development is also very important (which I still need to improve upon). After hearing stories about nofap, I expected to take personal development to a whole new level and reach perfection which was one of the things that motivated me. I was hoping to exercise 7 days a week, get up at 7 AM, have flawless social interactions, be productive all the time and when this didn’t happen, i would be super hard on myself which ultimately increased my depression. But knowing that change takes time and that mistakes are crucial for improvement, I can live with that any day.
Changes that I’ve noticed:
For the first 6/7 weeks i was very unhappy, but I feel amazing where i am know which is why I think a good mindset is also vital when starting nofap.
Better skin (although this is probably due to skin medication).
I am more accepting of my flaws and feel more comfortable being open with others.
Seeing girls as people just like myself.
Less productive (this is kind of controversial but I dunno, i just haven’t had the same motivation, but i don’t think this is down to nofap. Before I started nofap, I was working 80 hours routinely and i think burnout started to catch up to me and i still feel very productive.)
To close, my message for anybody starting nofap, don’t have unreasonable expectations and get out of your own bloody head. For instance, don’t think your some women magnet all of a sudden, thinking that when your walking down the street every girl is looking at you when in reality this is probably not the case. For me nofap has been helpful but it probably isn’t going to turn your life around alone.
LINK – My first 70 days