Age 20 – From depressed, cute emo girls to fit, healthy looking girls

I was addicted for 8+ years. And I had multiple 30 day failed attempts before so I felt really hopeless. I was smoking for only like 4 months and quit as soon as I realised it’s not helping me at anything. Took like 2 weeks to notice my bad posture and change it, what I do now: I just walk with my chest puffed out more and I always look up or straight, never down. And I have a serious, focused look on my face.

It’s crazy, the natural senses will get very active again.Your body starts to turning to normal procces after one month or so. so that’s where it starts but that’s just my experience it could be longer or shorter for others.

I still have to search up “goth” on Instagram sometimes because that used to be my thing since I was like 11. These depressed cute emo girls are still my main type but I feel it slowly changing towards fit, healthy looking girls.

I didn’t believe [nofap increased attention from women] at first but a girl from my old school that I had a crush on messaged me on FB after like 2 years randomly and she was actually working at the same place as me. Then a lot of girls are replying to my IG stories, never was that frequent. I think it’s because you just start posting better content and they recognize that. … A girl doing stuff with her hair, like waving it, and then looking at you to see if you noticed her. I try not to look at the girl when she does that to show I’m not desperate. That works.

[Withdrawal] waves are crazy, I just punch the air, listen to aggressive music to get through. Or sometimes even fucking cry and go to sleep, then wake up refreshed again. It’s hard, but it will get better each and every day.

I´m studying to graduate high school (I failed last year), starting up a business so doing a lot of web design and in the meantime watching self development videos from RSD instead of ASMR or porn.

Just wanted to share my experience, I´m currently on Day 81:

If you´re used to watching porn and fapping for so many years like I was (10+ years), I´m 20 now, then your mind is so addicted to that miserable state that it will be the hardest thing in your life to quit that addiction. It is a tough challenge for me to keep going. And if you´re in that miserable state (Day 0), I know that you´re so fucking blind and disconnected from the world that you think it´s normal to jerk off in alone a dark room to goth porn and shit. Anyways, as soon as you decide to heal yourself and take responsibility for your life, your mind will test you…hard!

Day 1 – Easy, started on the first day of 2019 but was pissed of that my last fap wasn´t to some “beautiful” porn. Bullshit mind block.

Day 7 – For the first time I´m the funniest in the group, feel less depressed.

Day 14 – I had the worst nightmares, jumpscare type thoughts, my mind was testing me if I was going to submit to my demons like I always did.

Day 30 – Feel motivated again, fixed my body posture, I´m noticing the smell, body language of girls, girls look at me a lot, play with their hair because of the way I carry myself, one girl approached me even. Not really a hot girl but I was so happy about that.

Changed my music taste from suicidal rap to more uplifting music.

Day 34 – Started working at a hospital, my first job. I´m noticing the light more than darkness in various locations.

Around this time I fucked up a little by checking out PornHub but I turned it into a not so bad lesson = I watched one of those videos where the girl tells you how worthless you are and that you can´t control your boner etc. I trained my focus and managed not to get one lol. Closed the site and never went back.

Day 60 – Leveled up = Quit smoking cigarettes, same style as I did with fap and porn. More nightmares and urges but didn´t submit to that and always felt much better the next day. Started organising my days and set a specific goal for this year.

Day 81 – I´m still having super dark days, a lot of anxiety attacks but always fight through it and feel better the next day – my mind is testing how successful I deserve to be. It comes in waves and every time you survive, you level up. I must say that I feel better than ever. It´s a lot of pressure but I know I´ll never go back.

I went shopping a few days back and noticed about 10 girls doing the hair thing in front of me, 2 younger girls said hi.

It gets harder every day but I finally feel ALIVE again. I can handle any pressure now.

FUN FACT: As your mind gets more positive, you’ll start posting a different type of content on your IG etc. – Girls will notice that and will message you more! Didn’t believe that at first but it’s true!

LINK – Your mind heals itself in waves! I finally feel alive again!

By Bundloo