I just wanted to share my story and hopefully it’ll be that extra push someone needs to keep going. I’m in college and always grew up a somewhat socially awkward kid. Now that doesn’t mean I was quiet and say stupid shit. I would laugh at a lot of things and talk too much in socials situations. If I got upset, I would shut up and people would notice.
I started watching p at about age 11, didn’t really ever m until 12. Up until about a year and a half ago, it was very consistent. My “traits” were: shy, impulsive, insecure, feeling less in-tune with my emotions, unable to hold a proper conversation.
On occasion I would look up “why do I _______?” and found a bunch of results pertaining to self-control problems. Eventually, I discovered NoFap and read up on how p and m can seriously alter the brain.
Okay… so for about a year I tried my best to stop. Got a few 3-day streaks in and felt a little better about myself in the moments before I started to break the streak again. I didn’t feel pride though because the habit hadn’t yet humbled me enough.
Eventually sophomore year of college rolls around and I actually kept a couple weeks off of p while I was vacationing with family. As soon as I got to college, though, I relapsed. Hard. One day, I went out with my college friends and I end up going back to my dorm with a girl. I was a virgin at this point, so I’m just thinking “holy shit I’m about to get laid by this really hot girl holy shit holy shit” and I don’t think about how I just m’ed the night before (and consistently multiple times the nights before that). I didn’t think about how my fuel tank was probably on E.
Got to the room, ended up only getting semi-hard, finished after an awkward night of bad sex on my end. It was the most embarrassing moment of my life. Luckily she was understanding and I just told her I was way too drunk. She seemed to believe me, so I wasn’t too hurt.
Anyway, that was the mental ass-kicking I needed to get my head in the game. I started taking NoFap seriously and even talked to my best friend who told me he actually had the same “traits” I felt that I had. He realized he was hooked on PMO as well. We held each other accountable and failed a few times, but that was the KEY. Find somebody you trust to hold you accountable.
After another year of trial and error, improvements were slowly made with each streak I made. I felt better, my thoughts were clearer, I was genuinely happy. My roommates all made comments on how I’ve really stepped up my confidence. I met a few great girls from second semester sophomore year up through this past semester (I’m a junior).
So around August-November 2017, I was confident, way more outgoing, genuinely content, felt secure, pulled HELLA girls, and I saw every girl as attainable. I also found a broader spectrum of women to be attractive. Without the internet letting you seek out the exact type of women you want, your mind opens up.
I could hold a normal conversation with a girl without thinking that I want to have sex with her on the spot. I wouldn’t have any anxiety while talking to them. Aside from conversations, girls would literally stare at me as I walked past. It’s about confidence much more than it is about looks. Always remember looks are completely subjective. There are people I found ridiculously hot that my friends would rate a 6 or 7.
Don’t let your guard down, however. I decided that since I had already beaten this thing I could PMO just once. Huge mistake. Cut out aphrodisiacs like caffeine and marijuana if you can. Alcohol really doesn’t help either. When you think about p, snap a rubber band on your wrist. The pain will eventually make a connection in your brain that p is NOT GOOD.
To sum it all up just remember: Be confident, believe you can do it (you really can even if you don’t think so), know that looks will change including how you see women and how women see you, you won’t regret the pain of this process at the end.
Good luck to you guys! I know you can do it. If I can do it, honestly anyone can.
TLDR: Before NoFap: Depressed, less attractive, insecure, impulsive, less liked. After NoFap: Genuinely happy for a long time, much more attractive, secure, in control, pulled lots of women.
BTW, the PIED is back, but for me it goes away after about a week of abstinence. By “goes away” I mean it’ll work for a few rounds with the right person lol. It takes 3 days for it to work properly for a full round with someone.
During my long streak, that shit was forgotten about. I grew up thinking something was wrong with me and I couldn’t get hard, but NOPE. It was the damn p lol
About to turn 21!