Age 23 – More carefree and confident, see women differently

I’m 23M, been fighting against porn addiction since I was 18. At the start of 2020 I took this a lot more seriously, and went without porn and masturbating for longer periods. Now i would genuinely say I have fully recovered. I don’t miss it and believe it to be a fantasy, I crave something real now and don’t want to settle for less.

Changes I noticed

  • I no longer view women as objects. I didn’t realise i was doing this until i stopped watching porn for a long time

  • I only get sexually aroused if I’m with a real women who I know is interested in me (so very rarely unfortunately)

  • I now genuinely see average people as beautiful, my standards have lowered and have caught myself thinking a girl is very pretty, not sexually but how 8 year old me would’ve thought a girl is pretty.

  • I’m less anxious and ashamed, more confident

  • More goal focused and more driven to be successful. Because I’m no longer settling for something cheap (porn) I’m finding I’m planning how to become a successful man in order to potentially get a wife one day.

Despite this, I experience little sexual attraction now. I think porn hypersexualised my thoughts and me in general, now because I’m not dosing myself constantly with that stuff, I just am… me. I don’t care that a “hot babe” just walked in the room, because in my mind, what am I going to do? Nothing will happen, so I just don’t care.

The result is now I’m very care free, I feel happier and more confident in myself. I’ve started to become more goofy and I love to see people smile again. I work in customer service and was told by a customer that apparently I’m the happiest person working there and I was her favourite… that was nice.

My advice, if you want it, learn to hate porn. Associate porn as a loss, learn to want real connection and learn to crave true intimacy. Porn is an escape, learn to be uncomfortable, life is uncomfortable.

Porn reminds me of medusa and the myth of sirens. Both are monsters who draw men in with beautiful things and strike them down to death. Hercules used a shield as a mirror, you have to do the same, learn to view porn like how it is. It’s a fantasy, directed at you, is there a camera, is it scripted, are the emotions fake, what are they wanting from me? Attention, money, viewership, fame.

Anyways, always hold yourself to a higher standard.

LINK – My thoughts having fully recovered

by SombreLook