Some of you may know me, have read my posts here and there, but most of you don’t. I was mostly a lurker in this forum, I read other stories, tried to relate them to mine, tried to find useful tips, tried to find the slightest hope somewhere. Now I am 25 years old. About two years after my no PMO journey began ( 6 March 2016, I was 23), I can safely declare that I am almost free of porn, masturbation, flatlines, and -on top of everything- PIED.
Nowadays I can have sex with two condoms, without erection boosting medication, sometimes multiple times a day. I went from not having erections at all, afraid of sex, afraid of my girlfriends to having amazing time and enjoying a great sex life. And things keep improving, I expect more improvements to take part during the next years probably. Rebooting and rewiring are a marathon, not a 100 metre race, be patient, abstain and REWIRE, REWIRE, REWIRE.
In the beginning of my reboot I would fall deeply in flatline after an O. Now I don’t. I still get negative effects after an O sometimes. My face gets irritated, sometimes a get itchy eyes (sometimes I have to use eye drops), sometimes I become sleepy. All these might get better, but I might as well suffer from a light form of POIS, who knows, time will tell. ED medications, especially kamagra where useful. They helped me lose my virginity and overcome my anxiety. I can have sex without them now, but occasionally it’s not a bad idea to use them.
Huge changes took part in my life during the last two years:
1. Found a great girlfriend who stood by me throughout all the difficulties.
2. Graduated from medschool, and now I work as a doctor, I earn my own money, I help people, and I am planning to move to UK for higher training.
3. I got my driving licence and bought a new car with my own money.
4. I served in my country’s army last year as a doctor, which was a great experience and gives me great pride.
5. I learned tons of new things and got new skills, made new friends, visited 5 European countries altogether.
6. I overcame my shyness, my acne, became more hairy with a deeper, more masculine voice.
I will post more about my experience and I will answer to any questions you might have when I find the time. I don’t log often into yourbrainrebalanced during the last months, feels like I don’t need it anymore.
Special thanks to many people, whose posts where so helpful and gave me strength. Gabe Deem, The underdog, Charlie Marcotte, 40New30, dualwield, Recovered, A New Man, RebornAgain, many guys from RebootNation, many other guys I their names I don’t remember, please excuse me, unknown heroes against the pandemic of porn and masturbation. You might not know me, but I owe you more than you know.
I am sure things will get even better. Life without PMO can only become better. I will try to update often. Cheers!
LINK – I guess it is high time I wrote in this section…
INITIAL POST (2.5 YEARS EARLIER) – The adamant rebooter (Goodbye edging/lurking, hello real life)
First of all excuse me if any linguistic mistakes occur, English is not my native language.
tldr;23 y.o., fappped first time at 13 to fantasy, not addicted to porn, rather to edging at fantasy, models’ photos or girls’ fb photos, saw some porn around 16-18 but never addicted (phewwww), have barely watched 4-5 times during the last 6 years. E.D. from a year due to excessive edging I believe, social anxiety, low energy despite being athletic, virgin (had a relationship and some make outs but never more than that), edging, porn, orgasm, masturbation free since 104 days, seen improvements, long way to go.
So guys here we are with a case that maybe would fit more at nofap than YBR, but it is less insightful and helpful so I’ll post here. I was edging a lot. I rarely orgasmed (I would edge 5 times a week but i would O once per 20 days or a month). I stopped even getting blue balls. I noticed chronic ED(no MW, some SE but week, no erections to girls, low libido etc, no erection when first intimate with GF). I was addicted to watching pics at Facebook profiles of girls, most of them I didn’t even know, and I fapped to them. I was a Facebook lurker. I was checking girls’ profiles, girls which never would I approach. Despite having a lot of friends, among them females, I had social anxiety. I rarely talked to strangers, I was shy when talking to professors. I realised ED before 15 months, but didn’t know what the cause was. I stumbled upon YBOP, YBR and nofap and that was it. I thought that maybe excessive edging created a neurochemical imbalance in my brain and exhausted somehow my penis. I quit it cold turkey. Now I am 104 days. Relapse in not an option. I stopped lurking at facebook profiles, I use only for practical purposes or for reading news. I have seen improvement but I have a long way to go. I have a GF for 4 months,2 weeks before a found YBOP.
Improvements so far:
1. Penis doesn’t feel dead. It used to feel cold, like a dead organ. I felt like I had nothing inside my underwear. An organ that didn’t belong to my body. Now it has reunited with my body, it is longer when flaccid, it is warmer, its colour is more normal(I don’t know if all those symptoms make sense to you, but I can’t describe them better hehe), I can see a lot of veins upon it, and more are visible with time. Probably there was a disturbance in blood circulation which is being fixed.
2. After day 65 I starting feeling libido come back. I had some some very horny days around 65-104. Now I am flatlining, but much less severe than before. It is a flatline with MW and SE.
3. Erections are much better, harder and last longer. Haven’t taken my underwear off with my GF yet, but I feel the difference. SE occur often and they are harder as well.
4. I experience blue balls again.
5. Face redness is going away.
6. New hair is growing on my body, and the pre-existed is growing faster.
7. Deeper voice.
8. Social anxiety decreased. I am much more comfortable around women. i haven’t tried getting numbers or such because I have a GF but I have initiated talking and flirting with some women, with positive response.
9. MW happens again. Not every day, not the strongest, but pretty decent. It last about 15 minutes, sometimes it goes away when I stand up. Midnight erections happen again as well. When I wake up during night usually I have erection. When I wake up with my GF I might have trouble peeing because penis being erect!
10. Less brain fog.
11. More energy and motivation.
12. I enjoy life more, more fun and pleasure.
12. Vivid dreams.
13. Don’t lurk at facebook anymore. It seems boring as hell. Pursuing real life experience more.
14. Pelvic floor seems more relaxed.
I’ve had 6 or 7 wet dreams, I don’t remember exactly. I am a recently graduated medical student. Doctors don’t know anything about PIED in my country. It is time to raise awareness about all those shit. I know I have a long way to go. I am adamant about it. I trust the process, I will fix my life. Relapse is not an option. Thank you everybody for reading, comments are most welcome