Woah it’s hard to believe it’s been 127 days since I last fapped. This hard mode challenge has been very difficult. But it’s been so worth it. I changed my strategy from all previous attempts. I went kind of extreme this time.
One thing I did was eliminate all female pixels. No dating apps, no Instagram, no pictures. This seemed to really help, and kept triggers to a low. Not masturbating or having sex has also kept triggers to a minimum. I guess you could say I went into monk mode lol.
I remember over 4 months ago, I would always carry around immense shame. A sense of hiding a part of myself from the world. I seem to be more open now when I’m around people. I’m also more okay with being imperfect and my perfectionist nature has subsided greatly. I feel more at peace and I feel proud.
I feel grateful for people like Alexander Rhodes and Gary Wilson. Bless them. The world needs more people like them. Courageous and pioneering in a space no one initially wanted to talk about. I’m just so happy to have come across their teachings. My life will never be the same.
And I never thought I could do it. I failed countless times before. Each time I failed, I resolved to learn more – about triggers and strategies and the own inner working workings of my mind.
Until one day 14 years after the beginning of porn and 6 years after learning about nofap, I began to feel I had a pretty good handle on it. And this isn’t it. There is more to learn and more improvement to be made. Who knows, I may make a mistake and PMO once again, but my resolve is that I will continue my course. PMO on hard mode. For a year perhaps. How many people would be able to say they did that?! Quite cool if you ask me. Total monk mode, and for a good cause.
If I can live a less shameful life, as Nofap has allowed to do, then I can shine more of my own light onto others and make a difference. That is what I truly want in this life. To make a positive impact.
There’s so much more to say, but I’ll end on this… I’m eternally grateful for NoFap and feel blessed. I wish you all the best on your journey and remember – YOU CAN DO THIS. NEVER GIVE UP. And also, I’d like to help you if I can, so get in touch if you have any questions. Goodnight!
LINK – 127 days PMO Free Hard Mode
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