A brief background about me: 26 y/o male. Was struggling with fapping (commonly edging) and used porn between the ages 13-23. So what happened after I became 23?
After graduating college I entered this dream job for me in a government Office. I can hear you saying can being an officer be a dream job? Well in those times it was an exciting job for me and I loved it working there, preferences… And I was one of the best employees. It was fulfilling. Both serving my country and doing the job that I love. Anyways, after a year I lost my job in terms of circumstances beyond my control. It was really destructive for me back then and made me struggle with psychological issues. If you are curious about what can be the thing that is “circumstances beyond my control”?. I will make a tragic connection between the reason and NoFap.
So, I lost my job because of my father. Because, I live in a country that human lives do not matter. The authorities of my country are materialistic such as loving “Money” and “Power” and they are using religion so powerful to control the population. They are using Media so powerful to brainwash the population. Even though the religion I and the authorities believe does not suggest being materialistic and that the human rights matter. The religion I believe suggests not using Power over oppresed people. So they are doing the opposite things for a very long time which makes them a sinful community. Anyways, I am pretty sure that they will burn in hell, but ofcourse God knows the best. I am not the one WHO is going to judge.
I am not forcing you guys to believe in the religion I believe or any other religion. But Because the religion I believe in, does not force to make people believe in this religion. But it was one of the aspects in my curing process. The first sentence of the book that I believe is “read“. Read? Read what? It suggests researching and finding the truths in terms of living a happy life in this World and the other World when we are going to die. The Word read is a clear suggestion not to become an illiterate person. It suggests making researches about science, life, philosophy etc. anything that is needed in this world to live a happy and a conscious life. About %80 of the population in my country unfortunately are illiterate people. Because of this, it is very easy for the authorities (I guess in most countries) to direct these people even if they suffer from poverty and living an unhappy life. That is why we should read guys to live an happy and fulfilled life I am not going to dive deep into the religious things but if you have any questions you can message me or leave a comment below.
So, I lost my job because of my father? Yeap. My father was a bureacrat and served for his country all around the world. He made it to the top and was very successful. Most of the time he was living alone because of abroad duties. We could see him like around a month in whole year. During these times some psychological issues developed, and in 2016 he popped a psychotic break and still struggling with major depression until nowadays. Because of psychotic break, the government, without any interrogation, pulled him from his job because they thought that he was betraying his country The plan was putting someone else to that position who is someones’ relative in the authority. So they got a chance when my father got sick and made a slander on him for betraying his country. That is the level of pitiless of the authorities in my country. So I was an officer serving for my country. But my father was a betrayer in their eyes. So they immidiately broke off with me too. Without any interrogation or questioning.
The link that I will make with NoFap is that I knew that my father was a heavy porn user. I can see all of the negative effects of this issue on him.
- He is still struggling with major depression and using pills for it.
- He has got heavy eye problems. Both hypermetropia and astigmatic.
- His teeth are not so strong and almost lost all of them now he has porcelain teeth.
- His skin is so sensitive that it pours out.
- He is struggling with brainfog and willpower to do anything nowadays.
- He has got kidney problems too.
Nevertheless, you can find in this forum and research papers of negative effects of using porn and frequent ejaculation. I am writing these in order for you guys to take him as an example. You can fall to ground from the top levels in a tragic way. Anyways, I love him because he did his best to be a father to me. Using porn doesn’t mean that you are a bad person. He always directed me to good and right things.
Back to me. After I lost my job. My 5 year old relationship ended after 2 years losing my job. It did not end in a bad way. Because she needed to go back to her homeland after graduating. We could not manage long term relationship and it ended. So I was jobless and lost my girlfriend. And I could not find a decent job because I was a son of a “betrayer”. No one took the risk of giving a job for me. Well they were right. I am not judging them. Authorities could cause them trouble.
This was the part of my life that I decided to make changes. I was totally lost and trapped in my house. Because no one was (could not) working in the house. We did not have any income too.
After watching some self development videos. I encountered with NoFap. At first, I did not believe that it could have such an impact on people’s lives. But the benefits part was giving me a hope. That hope was the only source of happiness back then for me. I remember that I watched so many videos of fapstronauts that several couple hours past. I started searching like crazy. All these suggestions of meditation, cold showers, working out, semen retention practices etc. I read articles about these topics for hours. And I decided to give it a go. I had nothing to lose…
So I made a plan. If I could not find a decent job. How about any job I could make? Because this was the part my brain was most of the time thinking about, since we had no income. First I had to solve this problem in order to think of better plans. So the day after, I got out. Now my plan was to find any job. I visited several stores, restaurants vs. After like visiting 20 places. A restaurant owner decided to give me a waiter job. I explained myself clearly with no lies and he was merciful and good person. So he gave me a job. Now at least we would have some income I was relieved a bit at last.
Then I made another plan that I should be so good at something that people would want to work with me even if I do not take any actions. This thing should be something I love also. Backdays I was interested in Data Science and Artificial Intelligence. I wanted to take a Masters degree in this area. This program was only in one college in the city I live. You should take two exams and pass an interview in order to get in the program.
So I was practicing semen retention, cold showers and started jogging in the mornings, well I was working in the restaurant between 10:00-22:00. It really felt good day after day. I was still in doubt that this could work but was giving a try anyway. Day after day my overall psychological mood got better and anxious status started to fade away. It was around day 20 that I took the exams for the Masters program. I never felt so calm and clear minded in any exam in my life! I was shocked. This started working. After 3 days I got the email that I passed the exams and an invitation for the interview.
Day after day my brain fog faded away and my mind became clearer. I took permission from my boss in the restaurant and went for the interview. Normally, I would be so excited and anxious during the interviews but that day, man, I was like a wolf. I expressed my self so clearly and confidently with my deep voice. Because I was interested in the area, we had a chat about a hour with the professors. One of the professors is my associate now in the company we are running Which is the spoiler of the end of this thread
After one week I got the acceptance email from the College with scholarship! I was very happy. But, there was an issue. I was working in a restaurant 10:00-22:00. How could I participate in the classes? Classes were between 6p.m.-9p.m. three days a week. I talked with my boss if I could work these days till 5.30 p.m. and I told him that he can cut my wage for these hours. He accepted. So I could take my classes
Ofcourse the Money I earned as a waiter was not enough for a population of a house of 4. But at least it was something. Every single day I was dedicated with my semen retention, meditation/prayer, cold showers and exercising. I was both successful as a waiter and in my classes. But it was not EASY. Guys, if you want to earn something it takes a lot effort and patience. But after a while you get used to it. I was active from 8a.m. in the morning till 11p.m. at night. In my resting times in restaurant I was studying for my classes in college. At night I was taking courses online in order to develop myself in this area etc. It was not easy but nothing is impossible if you are dedicated and patient.
So in the first year I made 4/4 GPA in the masters degree program. I realized that after you accomplish hard tasks. You get use to accomplishing hard tasks. You do not procrastinate doing tasks. So, semen retention was hard I did not procrastinate. Cold showers was hard and giving pain, again I did not procrastinate. Standing on foot whole day in a restaurant was not easy, I accomplished that. Studying for lessons was not easy with a tired body but did not procrastinate. Because, now I was mentally and physically used to cope with procrastination and hard tasks. This was what NoFap transformed me into. By the way I was in semen retention for a YEAR while these things were happening
This year I got an offer from one of my professors. We went out for a coffee and he told me that if I want to join him for an artificial intelligence company. I started crying suddenly. All of the hard work payed off. Now we are running a new established company which I am now managing 10 employees. On weekends I am giving lessons of Data Science for the Public Good for a group of 30 people that are interested in. After the lessons, we are trying to solve the problems of the city we live in with data and artificial intelligence applications. And we are developing projects. So my second plan worked! Now I became one of the popular Data Scientist in my country and yes people want to work with me.
Briefly I will state some other benefits:
- After I started with the company. I started going to gym. Before, when I was in college, I was also going to gym but struggled with adding weights to the bar. Now I am able to lift 120 kg in squats. 130 kg in deadlift and 95 kg in bench press. Yes, this practice helps you get stronger! Which are almost doubled when compared to previous weights of mine.
- I was objectifying and fantasicing about women all the time. Now, these thoughts never come to my mind. This porn thing is so toxic that it made us think women as objects. So sad..
- Starting practicing minimalism. Which helped me improve in decision making and mind clearness.
- Although I read some threads that write women attraction as benefit and some fapstronauts see it as a “goal” well it should not be a “goal”. This is the natural developing process. Since every aspect develops in your life. Like, I have a more mascular body, due to semen retention benefits I have a clearer skin, I am more confident. In general I look and act manly and I look healthy. In womens’ nature there is this in default. They are attracted to power. They want to have kids from a man that can protect them and look after them. This is nature. So attraction from women is inevitable. And yes I experienced many of them. Well still waiting for the right person for marriage since it is not an easy choice.
- Confidence is up the roof.
- I do not like using bad words but, not giving a fuck state is my favorite. What ever you face with you do not care. Is there some toxic things going around you? You do not care. Because, now you know yourself %100. You know what kind of person are you. You know the things you have accomplished.
- In general you are more healthy both physically and mentally. I will not go in details.
Guys, this is real. You can make it. If there are ones WHO are in doubt. Do not be. Be patient. Do not just practice NoFap. Be in constant research in order to develop yourself and live a fulfilling life. In other words “read” .
LINK – 3 Years of Experience!