I began my journey in 2013. At the time I was extremely fearful of my situation. I had PIED, I was nervous around women and intimacy was a difficult thing for me. I even developed HOCD. Fapping had a detrimental effect on my mental health overall, and I began to feel shame.
I abstained for most of the last 4 years. I questioned in that time whether I would ever heal. I would occasionally test with disappointing results. ‘People heal within 6 months, why am I suffering years later?’.
I was basing success purely on resolving PIED. I was so focused on this failure that I didn’t notice my being more confident around women or the mildly beneficial boost to my mental health from abstinence (this is likely due to the fact I have mental health issues that are related to other problems). These weren’t ‘super-powers’ but just some areas realigning. I was also more productive, and was able to hold down a job and study at the same time. I doubt this would have been possible if I’d spent time every day fapping.
PIED wise: I had some marginal success with a girlfriend about a year or so ago, but that was followed by failures. The only way I managed to cure it was by taking Viagra. I did this with a new girlfriend for a few months and slowly I was able to maintain erections on my own. I can get hard by simply touching her now, something I thought would be impossible. I can get aroused by a living, breathing woman, not an image on a screen. My delayed ejaculation gave way to premature ejaculation, but I can control it more with time. The point being is that I needed to rewire before I could fix this. Rebooting alone doesn’t solve it, it just puts you in the position to be able to.
However: I wouldn’t say I’m 100% cured. After a series of sessions with my girlfriend, I used porn when not seeing her out of a combination of horniness and boredom. I had 0 ill effects, and it actually made my sex drive increase. Until the 2nd time, at which point I crashed. It reminded me exactly what is so nefarious about pornography, and the effects it has. I reset my timer, but bounced back quickly. It was a blip in otherwise successful progress.
I haven’t logged in for ages, but thought I would drop by and share that bit of success with you. Good luck to you all!
LINK TO HIS RECOVERY JOURNAL – 24 Y/O, PMO for 10 years.