So I had sex and it was awesome and not so awesome. I’ll explain.
For a little background. I would say I discovered NoFap about two years ago when I traveled out of the country to visit my then girlfriend and realized I couldn’t get it up for her and this was someone who was beyond my type when it came to body type. She was literally the most attractive person I had been with and had a natural body that most would die for.
After realizing that this stemmed from endless amount of time watching porn and masturbating, I vowed to stop doing both. Like many people here, it wasn’t that easy. It was a rollercoaster ride. I would make it two weeks and then relapse. 30 days then relapse. And the cycle continued, but I kept learning things on the way and my streaks got longer than the times that I would relapse. The one thing I would say though, is having that failed attempt in the back of my mind is what pushed me to continue going.
I’m not sure what triggered such a strong determination this go around, but I’ve been strong for 68+ days now and have no intention to look at porn again. The idea of someone else getting off with another person, while I’m just oogling and touching myself seems really sissy.
During this process, I’ve started going to the gym regularly, running more often, cold showers from here and there, meditating from here and there, but I think one of the biggest changes that made this process easier was that I started going out to clubs/bars often to dance and interact with women.
On nights where I would normally stay at home and maybe M. I would instead go out and use that energy to dance with women. Luckily, I’m an okay dancer. So anyone who is a millennial or younger knows that often times dancing with women includes grinding body parts and I believe that these interactions helped me relearn how to be aroused by touch and sight.
Fast forward to about two days ago…I had sex. Don’t want to get too detailed when it comes to how and why, but it was with an acquaintance and it was clear early on that we had good chemistry. So the good thing was that I was able to get hard and stay hard during the process but most importantly from the beginning. Often times I would get hard but as soon as I would try to insert it, I would lose it immediately.
I’m above average so it tends to require some back and forth before everything is working so I was pleasantly surprised that I was able to hold it for so long.
So the negative was that I feel like I had gone so long w/o sex that I’ve become overly sensitive and I came way too quick. lol. Granted I’m good at other things and we did it two more times after, but it was still way too quick for anyone’s liking. I believe that I can solve that problem through kegels and just better technique, but at the end of the day I’m happy that all this time that I’ve put into this has finally bared fruit and now I have more reason to continue this journey.
Because sex is fun, but connecting with another human being is more fun and even though it might have not been mind-blowing, the girl that I slept with was really cool about everything and was ready for multiple rounds.