I discovered nofap sometime in May 2016. I was on a business trip with a lot of down time and I remember reading about it and just tripping! Like seriously what the fuck? How could porn be bad? Isn’t masturbation good?
That was over 3 years ago. In that time span I went through all of the motions. Streaks to binges. I read all the literature. I posted on nofap and spent endless hours on the forum. I got into podcasts and journaling.
I suffered with PE and wet dreams and did prostate massage and meditation. I over did it and under did it . Preached and kept it secret. I did weird kegling exercises sitting in traffic. I edged for days and went monkmode for months. I jizzed blood all over a tinder stranger’s tummy.
Things were up and down and the roller coast went on… For years. It was chaos.
But what I want to share with you is the now. Slowly over time the hectic nature of all this has subsided.Something in me has changed.
Over the 3 years of everyday working on it, I’ve literally rewired my brain. I just don’t desire porn.
I was having sex with a girl a few months back and she threw on some porn and I can remember being entertained but not hypnotized the way I use to be. I watched it with such a calm vibe. I laughed, got hard, had sex. Sure I thought the porn was hot but it was in such a different way.
My main message for you is don’t ever stop. It doesn’t matter where u are in ur journey. The longer you battle the demon, the stronger you will get. I’m saying it took around 3 years for me of fighting to gain a mental breakthrough. I’m sure this is only the beginning. Really, this fight will be forever.
I chose the handle Everyday the Lion because we all must be a conquering lion on the daily. Fight the good fight. Be at war. Everything you do to better yourself, everyday you abstain and YES everyday you relapse and then feel depressed, it all adds up!
After many years you will ascend. Everyone’s timeline is different, but this shit is fuckin gnarly and it 100% takes time!
You know the benefits. But really the truest one is that the weight of porn and sexual addiction that has tormented you and those closest to you….. that weight will lift and in your levity will feel the truest thing in life. That sex is just a part of life. It’s NOT everything in life. As you let go you will see why you held this addiction so close. Why you numbed out for hours on porn. When you get to the root of your problem. It’s nirvana. It’s an understanding that will give you peace.
Fight the good fight brothers. Live in the war. Breathe deep and carry on. The longer you do this, the closer you get. Everyday the mother fucking lion….