First I apologize if this story is a long winded, but I feel the details are important. I feel there are quite a few individuals that have a similar situation to me. I want to say… There is HOPE! I started watching porn and fapping basically everyday since I was 15. Sometimes several times a day. Never knew the actual harm I was putting myself through. As time would go on. A few years later I would .my first sexual experience with a Woman. However like alot of individuals that have abused porn. I wasn’t able to orgasm or ejaculate. Its almost like nothing work while have sex with a partner. For years I never attribute it to porn or fapping. I’ve tried everything you could think of…. supplements, creams, sex stimulants, herbs and so on….. NOTHING!!! I just wasn’t able to have an orgasm through any form of sex except if I fapped.
As I grew older i figured porn was prob harmful for me. I was addicted and literally would spend hours searching for porn. Like most its started off with soft core and progress to some really dark niche. So what changed??? I been friends with the “girl of my dreams” for about a year. We decided to take it to the next lvl. With too many details you know what thats means. Now I’ve be in countless sexual relationships through my adult life. However the sexual aspect of the relationship was also frustrating and disappointing for me and my partners…. So the “moment” comes….
At this point my addiction was so bad. That even though I’m with a beautiful Woman that I was really into. I still wasn’t able to get an erection. Trust me she tried everything… Hand stimulation, oral sex, you name it. Nothing…. For me that was a turning point. Because the embarrassment on her face crushed me. Quite often female partners will think its their inadequacy thats causing the issue.. Quite often as Men were too embarrassed to say the root of the issue is PORN. I tired to quit 1000 of times literally. The thought of losing her was the motivation I need.
February of 2020 I stop fapping and viewing porn. Me and the “girl of my dreams” started dating and having sex regularly. And at the start. The same issues were there. However over time things changed. Erections were stronger. I could actually maintain an erection for longer than 3 minutes. However I still thought I would never orgasm through vaginal intercourse. The feeling was always. Then 1 day after a year and 2 months. Like out of no where it FINALLY HAPPENED!!! I was able to orgasm/ejaculate. Since then I have been able to achieve orgasm pretty regularly. Now this long story isn’t to boast or brag. But a story of hope. Im 39 years old. And finally experienced and orgasm with a partner and vaginal sex.
Im far from being cured. I avoid porn at all cost. I even try and sexually suggestive images. Trust me its not easy. A year and a half later. And I’ll still have dreams about looking at porn or images I’ve viewed. For me I had to cut all forms of porn and fapping out my life completely. For you it may be something different. But don’t give up. Keeping fighting. Took me 24 years to finally make that huge break through. Im so much more happier for It. Keep fighting and don’t be embarrassed to reach out for help!
LINK – Don’t give up!
By – J.Justice