100 days ago, after six months of trials and 10-15 day streaks, I made a deal with myself: I wouldn’t cum anymore or touch myself in a sexual way. It’s been 100 days and the deal is still going strong: I didn’t masturbate, I didn’t watch porn, I didn’t cum, didn’t even have wet dreams. What changed:
1) Talking to women. I talk to them A LOT now.
2) Feel more attracted to “normal” women (next door woman).
3) Sometimes more depressed as I can’t release sexual tension and still can’t find a partner.
Overall, it’s been a positive experience and I will continue. Looking to meet a partner in crime.
I used to be attracted mainly to younger women and only 6 to 10 on 10, but now I feel I am more open. Still, I can’t find one so far. Maybe later I guess. It’s difficult and makes me depressed often. I feel like it was easier when I could masturbate every day and get rid of the tension. But I guess sometimes you need to suffer to grow.
That’s my main problem with women: they feel my neediness. And that’s the only way nofap makes my life worse: I have so much sexual energy that I NEED (capital NEED!) to find a woman to release tension.
I don’t want to fap again as well. It’s pointless. I want to share my sexual energy with someone else, that’s what I want. That’s fulfilling!
Will be 40 soon and as for symptoms [that caused me to try nofap]… I wanted to connect with women and felt depressed.