Deeply rooted, powerful, unshakeable type of confidence

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My Nofap journey has been truly transformative over the last few months. I can say with full certainty who I was when I began this path is no longer who I am today. I feel transformed, empowered, and rejuvenated in so many ways. With that said, I can also say from experience that Nofap alone is not enough, you have to utilize the momentum that comes with it to take charge of all areas in your life.

So here’s an overview on some of the main things, starting with super powers.

The super powers do exist, they are a thing. But not in the context which it’s usually described as. You don’t actually “gain” any super powers. You don’t gain powers from simply abstaining from the habit of porn and self-pleasure that’s not how it works, at least in my opinion and experience.

In fact, I don’t really see the “powers” as powers, I consider them more enhanced abilities that come from your own dormant potential.

This is my theory on it…

One aspect of NoFap which we don’t discuss enough is sexual energy. Not to get to much into the esoteric or energy work but sex has a specific energy to it, it literally creates life. For us males our sex drive has a direct connection to our masculine power, our virility as men. This is why so many successful and powerful men have also had infamous sex drives.

When we’re addicted to the harmful cycle of PMO, we’re not just mindlessly jacking off to porn and pleasuring ourselves. We’re also literally draining ourselves of that masculine sexual energy, that virility I just mentioned. What feelings do PMO cause? Laziness, being lethargic, sitting around docile and numb. No need to go out and conquer life, I’ll just sit in front of my screen or phone and jerk it.

When we begin NoFap and stop the cycle of PMO, that virility, that masculine sexual energy finally has a chance to replenish, and more importantly it begins to grow, there’s no longer an easy, impulsive outlet for it.

By default, that energy then ignites something within us, an inner fire if you will, which causes all those “super powers” to activate. No longer being wasted away, that energy unlocks all the super powers which again in my opinion aren’t powers, just dormant abilities that get enhanced.

With that said, the enhancements I experienced were increased focus and an increased sense of calm. But the biggest difference I felt, was a massive leap in my self confidence. I mean exponentially more confident that I’ve felt in a long time. More importantly, it feels like an unshakeable confidence, not like a momentary boast of motivation from giving yourself a pep talk. No this is a deeply rooted, powerful, unshakeable type of confidence where I believe in my own self-worth and believe in my inner power and strength.

This has reflected both internally in how I think and view the world, and externally such as putting more effort into how I dress, my appearance, grooming etc. I have some weight to lose and have had my struggles with diet and weight loss, which of course impacts how you feel about yourself. But the confidence I’ve gained in myself is helping motivate me to stay committed to getting back into shape. Not because I don’t like myself or dislike how I like, but the opposite, because I value myself and like myself and know I can do better.

Ok so powers aside, how did I actually do it? What allowed me to stay committed to the 100 day reboot in hardmode?

First and foremost, willpower and motivation is not enough. Those things are finite, you’re only going to have so much motivation and so much willpower. You can’t rely on those alone to get you through this journey and I think that’s where a lot of people fail. Yes its great to feel inspired and motivated, but you need more than that.

I tried NoFap a few times and failed, and that’s what I did every time. What I’ve realized is you need to create a vision for the kind of life you actually want to live, the kind of love life you want to have. What sparked my drive and determination this time around was asking myself the question of is this what I really want? Is sitting here mindlessly jerking my dick until it hurt to videos of other people fucking then feeling lazy and numb what I want?

Do I want to go to bed at night lonely or disgusted with myself? I made myself envision the kind of life I do want, the kind of love life I wanted. To either find an awesome, loving woman to be in a relationship with or to have fun and date interesting, beautiful women.

For damn sure my vision was not to be mindlessly addicted to PMO. So I constantly thought about and focused on the kind of life I do want, envisioning the kind of love life I want, the kind of sex life I want, the way I want to feel, the experiences I want to have, This is absoloutely a must, to have a clearly defined vision for your life with nofap, imagine you succeed with breaking this addiction, how do you want your life to look?

The other absolutely important thing that has made all the difference has been implementing habits and routines for success. I have built some incredible new routines into my life, many of which started out as support for NoFap but quickly have become crucial parts of my daily life and habits that make me feel great and empowered.

I don’t know if there’s any specific routines that everyone must do, besides exercise ofcourse. But I can share the ones I’ve created. I do daily cold showers which definitely help with urges, daily meditation, daily stretching for flexibility, daily exercise and daily writing of 1000 words. I would definitely suggest meditation though because it helps center and calm your mind.

I hope my experiences help you on your own journey. What I can say having now had some time beyond just the reboot stage is that the real work begins after the reboot. Maintaining the same discipline and going from a day goal to a lifestyle.

Wishing everyone lots of success.

LINK – 100 Days and Beyond Review:

by Shamsby


UPDATE

Why I’m restarting my streak after 140 days, and doing another reboot without relapsing.

I’ve decided that I’m going to restart my counter ending my streak after 140 days and begin a new reboot starting today.

No I didn’t relapse, I didn’t go binge watch porn and PMO. But over the last few weeks I’ve realized that I have other bad habits that are similar in nature to the addiction of PMO and that I can’t consider my reboot a success unless I confront those issues as well.

The issues I speak of are sexting, and wasting a lot of time talking to women who I have no real interest in besides that. I’m not sure if anybody else struggles with this, but it’s a really bad habit I intend to quit. If I’m being honest, I’d say in some ways I replaced my PMO habit, with this habit instead which in my opinion is the equivalent of replacing smoking crack with smoking meth.

Yes I’m actually interacting with real women, but they’re not women I have any genuine interest in, or would even meet. Instead I just like the ego boast I get knowing I can have them or seduce them and in my opinion its similar in thought process to PMO. Because I’m wasting my time and energy over digital stimulation instead of pursuing the real thing.

Also, this behavior pattern causes unnecessary urges, where I constantly have to stop myself from the urge to self-pleasure and caught myself starting to a few times, its basically mental edging.

I’m really proud of my progress with NoFap, I have successfully kicked the porn habit, even with these urges I still haven’t gone and watched porn or allowed myself to masturbate. It feels incredible having been so heavily addicted to the whole PMO process. I have gained a tremendous amount of self-mastery during this journey so far, not to mention increased confidence and the many other wonderful benefits that come from NoFap.

But nobody is going to hold you accountable other than yourself, and that’s the point of this post, and the lesson I’d like to share. You can lie to yourself or you can hold yourself accountable to whatever standard you choose to.

As much progress as I’ve made, I have to hold myself to a higher standard, and that comes with admitting I have still work to do, and that this behavior is problematic.

Not to brag, but I’m pretty comfortable with talking to women, and I’m good at flirting. Also I’m a writer, so I’m pretty skilled at using words to seduce especially when it comes to texting. This has all contributed to this bad habit. I know we tend to focus on porn a lot, but I think sexting also is an area where we need to become mindful of as well.

Now by no means am I suggesting sexting is a bad thing, if the intention is in the right place. It’s one thing to enjoy that kind of conversation with someone you’re actually into, and intend on spending time with and enjoying intimacy with. That’s what you should be aiming for, and sexting is definitely a component of a healthy romantic/sexual relationship with someone. Whether your significant other, or a friends with benefits.

But that’s not what I’ve been doing, and that’s why I’m going to start over. Because instead of putting in the energy to finding that, I regularly find and waste time on women who I have no interest in besides physical attraction and I have no intention to meet them. For me, it’s just the ego boast of knowing I can have them if I wanted, or getting them to talk dirty or sending pics.

That’s not the kind of love life I want, also I feel like I’m kind of an asshole for doing it, because I’m basically toying with people. Sure I’m not meeting them in person or anything, but it’s still not right. This behavior isn’t new, it’s been there but I can tell its amplified since giving up porn, and beginning NoFap.

Not only is it a waste of time, I also have no doubt that its holding me back from having the kind of love life I really want. Because instead of being patient and putting energy into meeting someone I genuinely want to get to know and spend time with, I’m wasting my time on these empty text conversations that lack any real interest.

The reason I’m resetting and starting over is because I see it as similar behavior to PMO. Watching porn and masturbating numbs you from the feeling of loneliness in not having the kind of love or sex life you genuinely want. Well, my behavior pattern is similar, if anything its worse because I’m distracting myself with these artificial encounters which aren’t real.

So while I didn’t hop on a porn site and rub one out, I still see this as a failure and I have to hold myself accountable. I’m proud of my progress, and I know without a doubt that I have the power to succeed and overcome this new phase of my journey towards self-mastery with NoFap. But I can’t in good faith continue my streak while having engaged in this repeated, habitual behavior pattern.

I need to learn healthy communication habits, I’m still going to date in real life and get to know women. I’m single and would like to find either a relationship or a cool friends with benefits type situation. But I believe this behavior has been holding me back, just as much as PMO has,

One of the key things I’ve found in my journey so far has been that having a vision for the kind of life I want to live is especially helpful in overcoming the PMO impulse. Having clarity on the kind of love life I want helps align my behaviors realizing that vision, which is why I’m going to do another reboot, because this habit will not help in anyway to achieve that vision.

I’ll be aiming for another 100 day reboot as I did before, on hard mode and sexting/wasting time with pointless interactions etc. will also be a part of the criteria for success this time.

To everyone else who’s beginning their journey, or restarting after a relapse I wish you luck, and look forward to traveling the path to victory alongside you.