All the wait and hustle I did paid off today. Everything I found on mdf was true. It helped me rewire my brain to real life sensations instead of porn. Today, I was able to get it going in bed with a real girl after more than 2 years. These two years were harsh on me. I didn’t have the biggest thing that makes a man. One day, when I was not able to keep erection with a girl, I felt like I lost everything. That was the most down as I could be.
After that, I was still able to achieve erection by watching porn alone in my room, but I was broken from inside. Then, after some months, I found this app, and read serious and shocking effects of porn. That was the first time I came to know about porn induced erectile dysfunction. I read a lot about other people as well who were suffering just like me. I quit masturbating and porn, but it wasn’t easy. For a long time, porn became my getaway from stress of work and college because it released dopamine from my brain. I was seriously addicted to it. Still, I thought there was hope, so I quit pmo for 38 days. This was the longest time away from PMO I ever went.
Then, I found a girl from tinder and we started video calling and it escalated so I relapsed watching her nudes. I started watching pics and porn again, but was ill informed that I was cured. It went on like this for long until I was with another girl. She started touching me, but I couldn’t get a boner. I excused and went to the washroom and tried to get a boner but didn’t get it. I couldn’t do anything yet again after more than an year after the first incident. I was crying for days after that but this time I was motivated to complete what I left behind. I became more serious than I have ever been. I didn’t go to any parties. I didn’t talk to anyone. I only had one goal in my mind. To become a man once again. Gyms were closed so I started working out. I did 100 push-ups every day along with other exercises. I started going to work six days a week and still didn’t miss my exercises and yoga everyday. I worked more than 10 hours everyday and then came back home to take shower and exercise again. I woke and did yoga and exercise again. I started listening to Jordan Peterson in the bus on my way to work or back home. I started eating just steaks, eggs, salmons and some fruits everyday. I never knew that I could feel more energetic after resting less and working more. It was all magical to me.
I started loving my life once again. People started noticing change in me. Suddenly girls, wanted to be with me. But, I still didn’t let any girl swirl me from my path as it had happened to me before. I had boners very quickly by just talking to girls. One day, while I was working, I hurt my left arm, so I couldn’t exercise anymore, even if I tried. I didn’t take the injury seriously and continued working the heavy shifts until one day I couldn’t. I started seeing Physiotherapist and left my work, but it didn’t get any better. That was the end of my really good schedule, but that wasn’t enough to break me from relapsing. My friends started hating me for not joining them. I just couldn’t risk any kind of distraction. Eventually, I completed my 90 days streak, but on my 117th day I masturbated, but without porn. I didn’t know if it was right or wrong. I just couldn’t hold it any longer. I started masturbating about once in a week, but never aroused myself with porn. It continued like this until today when I met a real girl and and was able to get it going. I couldn’t control my smile today and even burst into tears, all of my hustle in this past year paid off. I am never going to watch porn again, and I wish anyone else could have been saved from this illness called porn.
LINK – It Paid Off
By – Navrajthegamer
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