It´s been a little over a year ago since i started my nofap journey. First month or two were very easy for me, i was happy and motivated that there is another and better way to live my life but i had many relapses as well. Couple months after i started going out more with friends and i remember going home two times crying that i didnt meet and fuck any girls at the party (i know i was pathetic and needy).
I started to avoid porn because what i learned about its effects on the brain and learned how to have a good time just with myself. This hasnt solved my issues with shame around women but i was at least less needy and a little more confident that im not dependent on other people.
The real and the most important shift for me became when i was reading self help books and found some deep memories that i long forgotten from my childhood and why there is a shame for sexuality in the first place.
Reading about how girls think and just the understanding of their values helped a lot as well (Rational male, Models).
I didnt really learn any pick up lines or something because that i learned that they are fake and just weird in the first place, i found out that i have joy of being over confident when trying to get a woman but i make it in a funny kind of way and they really like it. Its not that long ago that a girl told me that i have something most guys dont. I´ve slept with only 2 girls but those were two very satisfying nights for me not because of the sex but because i was able to attract a woman naturaly. There are two type of men that girls like, alpha and providers… well ideal is both of these, with the right mindset and just having a good time in the moment is the key to being fun for girls, the provider side is IMO the LTR requirement for me that i need to work on more, im kind of broke right now :D.
One last thing i wanted to point out that i can see needy guys as clearly as night and day now. No wonder women find these guys annoying, i cringe myself when there is no chemistry or fun but they still try. I was there too but those were the needy days i was talking about earlier.
The main reason why i wanted to make this post is to let you guys know that porn isnt worth it, i hope some of you find this helpful and hopefully made you rethink fapping with porn.