Here is a short summary of my story: Had known of nofap ever since 2018 when I was still in uni. Heard of benefits like improved memory and concentration, attraction, improved sex life and eradication of sexual dysfunctions (like ED, PE, PIED). Only attempted because of the improved memory and concentration because of school work; didn’t care about improved sex life and eradication of SD because I thought I was fine in that area. Fell on and off the wagon for two years until February 2020 when I couldn’t penetrate this guy I hooked up with (I am gay and if you don’t like that eff off). I was devastated! Found out about PIED. Decided to quit PMO altogether.
You can also follow me on this journey in my journal: http://www.rebootnation.org/forum/index.php?topic=19224.0
Hi all! I’m happy to report that I’ve gone 30-days, a month with nofap/noPMO! It honestly doesn’t even feel real! I’ve been trying for months or even years but fell on and off the wagon. This streak is by far my longest. However, I’d like to say that I don’t (and you shouldn’t!) have a number of days as a goal in my mind simply because I think of this as a lifestyle change. In my opinion, you should not be consuming porn ever! I will complete the 90 days to fix my PIED but after that I am finally allowing myself to try sex again and from then, sex only as a form of release. Maybe reintroduce masturbation in moderation every once in a while but no more porn!
Here is what worked and what has helped me reach this far:
- Exercise, better diet – This helped improve my confidence with my body first and foremost which helped with the urges. I found out on my earlier tries that if I PMO, I can’t exercise that well so this was a motivation for me not to PMO because exercise and having a healthy body takes priority over PMO any day.
- Adopting a ‘porn-is-not-an-option’ mindset – PORN IS NOT AN OPTION. When we choose porn we are picking fantasy over reality and our hands over some real meat
- Developing new hobbies or rediscovering old passions – With the free time that giving up porn gave back, I rediscovered my love for arts and that is slowly replacing PMO’s time slot
- Reading books and success stories – This is mainly for inspiration. If there are people who can do it, we can do it too!
- Keeping a journal and finding an accountability partner/group – This has been the most impactful for me. Now that other people know about my addiction, I find it easier to fight it and be more accountable because I have people out there who know about it. This journal has been a god-send. Thank you to my friends here in Reboot Nation. Thank you to Gabe Deem for such an awesome platform.
- Having a visual counter that you can see when you are sleeping or in places where you use to PMO – I have a calendar that I can see in my room all the time where I cross each day. It helped me stay off PMO in a sense that if I relapse, there would a day that didn’t have an X on it. My somewhat OC and perfectionist wouldn’t want to be seeing that every day.
- Being brutally honest to myself and to you guys and yet being optimistic with recovery – I found that lying and rationalizing about my PMO use is what has held me back on my previous tries. Being brutally honest and asking the right questions has helped me move forward with this reboot. It also goes hand in hand with the last point in a sense that I can’t lie to you guys and it was terrifying to tell the truth to a bunch of strangers but as time went by, it became cathartic. Accountability requires honesty.
- Having a strong WHY – It helped initially throughout this journey. Maybe from day 1 to 15, my main WHY was to cure my PIED but it has changed since then my strong why is now different and that is to have a better life. If anyone remembered the title of this journal went from Want PIED cured to Want a better life and I like that better.
Now for the benefits that I’ve experienced:
- Social anxiety is fading – I am able to look people in the eye with no problem. I also don’t feel as nervous around people.
- Sensitive dck and morning wood – This morning’s wood was off the charts. I thought that I had felt my strongest wood days prior but today’s MW was unbelievable – hard af and veiny. Upon showering for the day, it got hard with the slightest touch when I was soaping and cleaning it. Also, your dck starts looking better and cleaner if that makes sense. The erection is also firmer and fuller when erect or when not.
- Motivation, energy and mental clarity – Gradually, both comes back. It helps you get more things done even if you don’t notice at first.
- Appreciation for everyday things – I surprised myself a lot with how much everyday things can be enjoyable and doable. I used to hate building and repairing things partly because I thought I was incapable of doing them but during this journey, I did a lot of carpentry work that I previously thought I couldn’t do.
I’m not gonna list everything since this would be a lot more longer but it really has been a life changing journey. I would say the biggest challenge of this journey for me is facing reality, taking accountability with the direction of my life, and being a better person than I was yesterday. Avoiding the urges to PMO are easier for me to do but facing life is the hardest part.
PMO was simply my escape from life’s challenges and now that I’ve stopped using it, it is now time to face the real challenges. NoFap is giving me the tools to fight.
Anywho, PMO IS NOT AN OPTION! ESCAPING IS AN OPTION!
Starting from now, MOVING FORWARD AND IMPROVING OUR LIVES IS THE ONLY OPTION!