It’s disgusting that I even have to admit this.
My mind has been poisoned with porn from age 11, this is my longest streak without porn in my life (55 days as I write this). I’ve always wanted a girlfriend and still do.
When I was in school, girls were an alien species to be feared. As I grew up watching porn video after porn video… I began sexualising women. I used to imagine every woman I saw naked, pretty much all the time. I still have these thoughts, but nowhere near as frequently.
In the last 2-3 years, I basically became an incel (I know, right) and got really angry and jealous because, based almost exclusively on dating apps, I had decided that sex and dating is so much easier for women than for men. I wasn’t considering the fact that women get all the wrong kinds of attention from so many people, and they get just as lonely as I do (maybe more so). We all have needs and face problems in life. They’re not some alien beings with superior powers to us, nor are they inferior in any way.
Today, something just clicked and I suddenly realised that women are humans too. It sounds ridiculous, but that statement in itself shows just how damaged my brain was from porn. I was so caught up in justifying myself, that I never stopped to think about others.
I’ve always known something has been slightly wrong about my attitude towards women, but have been unsure how to fix it. I’m so glad to have a healthy perspective. It’s very refreshing.
I’ve also joined nofap on my journey to my best self. I’ve quit weed and started working out a lot more. Doing all I can to live my best life and I know you guys are too.
Keep up the great work, everyone!!
LINK – I Finally See Women as Equals!