The last time I watched porn is now more than two months ago (June 30). A lot has changed for me since then and I’d like to share my experiences with you.
One important change I noticed is that my natural sexuality is back. I crave real experiences again rather than pixels on a screen. The urges are easier to control and I always manage to convince myself that there’s no point in watching porn. I was also left with more time to put into other things such as reading and improving various aspects of my life. On top of that, many activities like listening to music seem more enjoyable than before, but I’m not sure whether this isn’t a placebo. All in all, it feels great without the shame and guilt I usually experience after a relapse.
My journey, however, didn’t turn out to be as easy as I expected. I came across many triggers on social media, in movies, and even while reading text posts. I had to get rid of Instagram, because I often caught myself mindlessly scrolling through pictures of women. Sometimes it would take up to three hours for an urge to disappear despite several attempts to distract myself.
Sexual frustration is probably the worst of all withdrawal symptoms, because it messes with your emotions. My desire for sex is currently very strong and I have trouble concentrating on other things. Masturbation doesn’t really help, because after 1-2 hours the cravings are back.
The difficulties of quitting porn will go away eventually and therefore shouldn’t be a reason to fall back into the old habit. I will post again when I’m 90 days porn-free and I wish you all good luck!