It’s been 2 around 2 years since I started this account and my NoFap/Self-improvement journey. The past years have been very rough. Currently I am on an 200 day streak I think. I haven’t kept count anymore, because how you spend your days matter more than a number.
2 years ago I was depressed, had terrible social anxiety and was very unhappy with my life, only sitting inside on my PC. You can read everything back in my history. I was sad not having friends or a relationship.
Currently I have a few friends, with whom I sometimes go out. I go to festivals alone to socialize. I have had my first job, first kiss, went on a few dates, no longer a virgin, a girlfirend, I am more social, better self esteem, stopped therapy since I outgrew it (according to the professionals) and probably more that I can’t remember. A lot of good stuff has happend.
It takes time, practise, patience and a lot of effort, but it is all worth it. NoFap was just a small part in it, in the beginning it got me motivated and helped but it isn’t everything. Today I don’t even think about it anymore, I haven’t visited the forum since the start of my current streak. The real growth comes from outside, in the real world.
Today, I am far from perfect. I still experience anxiety and I sometimes still feel very sad. But so does every other human once in a while. I just know now that I can work for what I want, and that happy times are ahead of me.
The thing about the increase in attraction people notice. I found that NoFap didn’t make girls like me more, instead it made me realise that I was already attractive the way I was, I just didn’t know it. I’m not saying I’m very good looking but I just didn’t realise girl could like me, for me. I never knew I had a sexual side and that someone would want to kiss me, or that I had the ability to kiss someone. I felt a whole new world opening for me the first time I kissed. All this time I thought no girl could like me, or that someone would be interested in me, I would have never dared to kiss someone else. But when it happend I realised it was a lie, I can kiss someone, I can be attracted to someone else.
I am now focussing on learning how to have good small talk and make friends. For every day 0 or day 1 person on here. If you really want to, you can make it. The more work you put in, the more you get out of it.
People often post that when on NoFap they get tons of attention from girls. I find this not to be true. They already want to or give you attention. But you never payed attention to them, or you werent confident enough to accept it.
My first date started with me knocking my chair over trying to give her a handshake. She said she felt like she was going to a job interview.
Our conversation was fine, with a few (what she found) awkward pauses. She even said it out loud. We didn’t click. And that was that. Just keep dating, don’t give up. Eventually you will find someone.