So I guess today is the day I’ve finally reached 6 months. This is the longest streak I’ve reached so far with my second best being ~130 days. (Nofap)
Some observations I’ve had:
I’ve gone on more dates in the past 6 months than I have in the entire rest of my life combined. (The 130 day streak I mentioned also helped hugely in this regard however I didn’t quite have my shit together back then as much.)
PIED does not magically disappear. I’m sorry to say but for some of us, myself included, this is not (solely!) Porn-induced ED PIED, but also Performance or Anxiety Induced. I just recently this past weekend had a sexual encounter with a woman I was very attracted to (new partner) and was pretty hard all the way up until it was time to grab a condom. This admittedly sucks and has had the bastard devil on my shoulder just saying “fuck it go watch some porn, clearly quitting hasn’t helped.” It also doesn’t help that she handled it in about the worst way possible.
The ability to masturbate 2-3 times a month absolutely helps in keeping you going. I believe I’ve found a healthy way of doing this that doesn’t involve fantasizing and instead revolves on focusing on calmly giving myself pleasure and finding what I enjoy. My recommendation is to still only do it as infrequently as you can stand. But having the option definitely helps.
One negative point or positive depending on how you look at it. I feel depressed, sad, angry, in general more emotional much more clearly now. Before was like living a grey existence and now I have all the colors of the rainbow… even the nasty ones. I realize these emotions were still there even when my mind was clouded. I think it is important part of healing to truly feel how you should. Even if that feeling is bad.
And on a related note, real women are truly attractive the way they should be. Perhaps this is the most clear as day noticeable difference and benefit. I remember literally couldn’t care less about a woman with nice ehm dimensions while on porn passing them in real life. Even model level beautiful women were kind of like ‘oh she’s pretty.’ But now… well, I feel like I am attracted to women how nature intended.
I realize probably not much of this is revolutionary information for most here as I’ve lurked for some time. In part I just kind of wanting to get these bits off my chest and also share my achievement for what it’s worth since I’m not exactly going to call my mom up about it. 🙂
So apparently I’ve somehow managed to make it a year. I, like I’m sure many of you decided to finally cut it out due to PIED, just general wasting time, and lack of inspiration to meet the opposite sex.
Some things I’ve noticed over the year:
- You never really realize how much porn is around and just in every facet of the internet until you try to get rid of it from your life.
- PIED absolutely does go away. Although there is no set time. I was not one of the lucky ones who was over it in 90 days. It also REALLY helps to have a healthy relationship with a girl you actually like on a personal level.
- Similar note, for me I never realized how important emotion was in sex until I started really connecting with women. I’m not saying porn was making this impossible. But it certainly doesn’t help.
- It does get easier. The addiction is still there, don’t get me wrong, however eliminating it from my routine for many months results in it rarely coming to mind.
- I feel a lot more emotional. Not always a good thing. Higher highs and unfortunately lower lows.
- Masturbation (without pornographic thoughts) once or twice a month depending on sex availability as far as I can tell is totally healthy and has in no way hindered my progress. Not sure if it helped with the PIED at all, but I definitely had a hangup with condoms, so whenever I masturbate I do it with a condom now. No more hangups with condoms. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- I’ve slept with more women this year than I had in my entire life prior. I’m not saying quitting porn gave me some super casanova powers. Just that I actually TRY now. (My goal was not to sleep with a large variety of women, it just ended up happening that way due to life.)
- Many of you might hate this one but I also quit anime in large part during the past year. It’s a huge trigger for me. I will probably begin watching it again however will certainly be careful in which I choose.
- I think the counter here helps. I’m honestly proud of it and I think it’s a simple yet effective way to keep me clean.
- Overall quitting has been a huge benefit to my life.
Just wanted to share with you guys. If anyone has a question please feel free to ask here, or PM me. I’m very happy to help and I know it’s not easy. It’s so good to have a community to share with and have a common struggle.