Sexually speaking, intimacy and sex is better than it used to be. It’s a lot more exciting and more fun, and there’s a lot more bonding. Sensitivity is WAY stronger, and my erections are better than they have been since I can remember, which is really surprising sometimes, – so that’s a total bonus.
I’ve invested most of the time I’d previously waste watching porn into practicing music, and it’s really paying off.
There hasn’t been a transformation.
Women are not particularly showing any more attention than they used to, but that doesn’t really matter.
It’s so much easier to make honest eye-contact and hold a sincere conversation without saying something awkward, or trying to see through someone’s clothes – or staring inappropriately.
This respect alone is worth all the effort.
In regards to all that alpha shit – my voice isn’t deeper, my jawline isn’t stronger, I’m not more muscular and my penis isn’t bigger – although it’s definitely stronger, which is good enough for me.
If anything, I’ve gained a couple of pounds.
I am sleeping better, and my hair is in better condition than it used to be – which is presumably related to a reduction in prolactin.
I don’t really have cravings to watch porn anymore.
They have mostly gone, although sometimes the old thoughts leap into my head.
It’s far easier to control or dismiss those impulses though.
I think this reboot (so far) has given me more willpower, and more clarity.
The mental fog cleared after the first couple of weeks.
Since then, I’ve had more time to think, and to be objective – instead of a depressive, confused cloud.
I’m less hypothetical in my day-to-day thoughts and feelings, and I’m less reactive.
Overall, I feel clearer – although this week has been emotionally really tough right out of the blue – but that’s a story for my own journal thread.
(People want to read about the positives, – not the mundane stuff)
So there are clear positives at 4 months.
I have no intention of going backwards, but this is still just the beginning I think.
I’m looking forward to continuing the voyage, and putting in the effort to be a better person.
Thanks for reading this far.
I wish you all the very best on your own journey.
Oh – PS:
Some crucial tools that helped me are as follows:
Entirely quit FB and stay away from all social media (and don’t make excuses)
Read as many books as possible.
Walking – get outdoors and away from your computer.
Leave your phone behind from time to time.
Keep a journal on here, and document your journey, your thoughts, your triggers and your emotional observations (this was one of the most helpful tools in understanding myself and some of my reasons for my bad decisions)
Don’t try to cheat the process.
LINK – 120 Days Out Of The Fog