So, I hung out with a girl for the first time since I started nofap, and it crystallized some ideas.
- porn conditions us to want to please ourselves. We want to touch ourselves, instead of feel someone else’s touch. We lose the ability to relax. We disconnect with the energy of our partner because we want to be touching our dick instead of having it inside of our partner
- this ruins connection in real life. It positions you to prefer watching instead of actively participating
- it destroys your self-confidence. Male porn stars are genetic outliers. Most woman don’t want to be stretched beyond feeling nice. Most woman just want to feel a nice average dick inside of them. But when we watch porn, we are taught that we are inadequate. That we aren’t enough unless we are way above average. And that’s not true. The average size exists for a reason- it’s good for the average woman.
- it feels so much better to be with a woman than to masturbate. But we can condition our body to learn that we prefer masturbation instead of sex. So nofap is essentially relearning our body to appreciate woman.
- watching and masturbating to porn causes massive rewiring of the dopamine systems in the brain. Not only do you find yourself getting off to things that you don’t actually want to experience in real life, your real life is affected. Focus, drive, motivation, are all compromised when you watch porn.
Nofap is hard. There is no immediate gratification. It’s the opposite. It takes months to start seeing the reward. But it really does separate you from the pack. This subreddit doesn’t just represent giving up a habit. It is about choosing to be excellent.