Age 46 - (ED) 444 days, life has changed 180 degrees
As of today I have been masturbation and porn free for 444 days. My life has changed 180 degrees I have no problems getting and maintaining erections, I have a strong normal sex drive and sex feels fantastic. I have increased confidence approaching women and talking to them. I have increased overall self confidence.
I'm 46 years old and around 2000 I fell into a vicious cycle of porn & masturbation. It started out slowly but before long I started having ED issues. At first I had no idea that porn was the root of the problem. I went to my doctor and he gave me a prescription for ED pills. The pills helped but I did not have the desire and drive for sex that I did years before and getting and maintaining an erection was very difficult. I somehow managed to maintain relationships I worked a lot so I'd blame my ED on tiredness, stress & heavy things on my mind.
In the back of my mind I knew what the problem was but would not accept it because I did not want to part with the porn.
I had tried once before to stop and made it about 10 days and caved in. I decided to try again for the 2012 New Year I got an early start and started in Nov 2011.
I was searching for information on the web regarding porn and ED and I found a great deal of information that I previously had no idea existed. Once I read some information and watched the video at http://www.yourbrainonporn.com I was convinced that porn & masturbation was my problem and if I wanted a normal sex life it had to stop!!!
It was not easy but the further along I got the easier it became to resist. I had some withdrawal symptoms but I pushed through them and kept my focus. My strength came from not wanting porn controlling my mind and body and the desire to have a normal loving relationship with a woman.
Question: When during those 444 days would you say you felt you had recovered?
For me the process of recovery was pretty much like recharging a battery. I still feel like I am improving even after all this time.
I had sex about 90 days into the process and it felt totally different and when I climaxed the feeling was amazing. Took about 15 minutes to fade away.
I continued to improve and my libido and sex drive grew stronger. At six months I felt amazing having no ED problems waking up with erections in the morning and experiencing wet dreams
At 1 year I fully felt like myself prior to my porn/masturbation problems.
Mentally sometimes I doubt myself but that is because I am used to the many years of failures. But I have not had a bad moment so far.
Question: How many orgasms did you have in the period you were healing? did they hold you back?
I still view myself as healing I both mentally and physically I abused myself for over 10 years.
During my reboot process I promised myself the only orgasms I am having is with a women or while asleep.
I kept that promise but once my erections started being reliable I got lucky a few times during the process. As long as there is no porn or masturbation involved I don't see it as a setback.
Medhelp helped me a lot because I had no idea there were scores of men suffering from the same problems as myself.
So again, if you could be a little more specific it would really help us all..
I will be as specific as I can remember.
In my 444+ days I have not masturbated, edged or anything of that nature. I like the fact that my body is functioning normally now and I will do nothing to risk that so masturbating is the last thing on my mind.
As far as frequency of "O" in the beginning i went months where my only release was wet dreams.
After a while your hormones start raging and you feel like a wolf and you need to find a willing woman.
Since I don't have a steady woman I try to get some action at least once a month but there have been times when its been 2.5 months. During those dry spells my only release is what my body does on its own.
If things get really bad then I'll seek the assistance of a professional woman.
Things would be great if I had a woman to come home to but I'm working on that. It will be really interesting because I can function normally during sex. As I mentioned before I was messed up for about 10 years. During those times it was very calculated I had to know weather or not to pop a ED pill if I got caught by surprise that was the worse, I'd use the old I'm not feeling well, I'm stress about work or I'm just exhausted if I was unable to perform.
LINK - Rebooting Works
PART 1 -As of November 27th 2012 it has been a year since I've viewed pornography and masturbated or masturbated. Period. In the beginning it was extremely difficult to resist the urge and the grasp that pornography had on me. I did find out that I was not alone (by searching the internet) in my battle; it affected men of all ages and walks of life.
It not only affects men directly but it damages, and in some cases destroys, relationships. I managed to walk the line between damage and destroy when it came to my relationships for years. I fell into the porn-masturbation pit around the year 2000 and dwelt there until I accepted the fact that I had a problem. I was in a personal denial as to the source of my problem. I went to the doctor once complaining about my inability to achieve and maintain an erection with my woman. He asked me questions about my health and my relationships but he never asked about the use of porn or masturbation. He gave me a prescription for a cialis medication which helped but I still wasn't right. It was more of a band aid on a knife wound. My problem was that my libido became severely damaged to the point where sex with did not excite me the way that it should.
I was lucky enough to encounter situations where I was able to have sex with women that men dream about and lust after but I was unable to become functional physically even though in my mind I wanted to engage. There was some sort of disconnect preventing me from experiencing the proper level of arousal. My libido was severely damaged by long term exposure to hardcore internet porn and masturbation.
I decided it was time to take control of my life and kick my addiction to porn and masturbation. I'm not going to say that it was easy by any means. It may have been the most difficult thing I've done in my life. I wasn't the worst offender but I was pretty bad. I used to masturbate most nights to relax myself and put myself to sleep. There were even some weekends where I'd masturbate a few times a day. Believe it or not there were withdrawal symptoms. My body had become used to the constant dopamine hits from masturbating. I experienced sleeplessness, headaches, mood swings, and total loss of libido for a few weeks in the beginning of my rebooting process.
There were days when my will power was tested but I kept myself busy by going to the gym after work and enrolling in online college classes. Once I reached my threshold, things became a lot easier to deal with to the point where I did not even think about porn or masturbating.
This may have nothing to do with it but since I've kicked PMO (porn-masturbation-orgasm) my thinking and my mind have become a lot sharper. As I mentioned above I enrolled in online college classes. I seriously kicked *** in these classes. My ability to retain knowledge is many times stronger and I can focus much better.
Trust me when I say this: As my Dad used to often say "It's Mind Over Matter." You can regain your sexual power and feel whole again. If you try and relapse don't let that discourage you! Brush yourself off and get your *** in gear and try again. Always remember why you are rebooting, the benefits and the self confidence that you will regain.
I met an attractive woman a few weeks ago in a supermarket. While I was talking to her I could actually feel my body reacting to her sensuality. My pulse quickened my breathing deepened and I was actually worried that I might sprout an erection that may show through my dress slacks and embarrass myself. This is coming from a guy who was struggling to get hard with an attractive, naked woman in his bed a few months ago. Trust me REBOOTING WORKS. Just leave the porn alone and go through the process.
The only obstacle between you and a healthy sex life is yourself.
TWO YEAR UPDATE
Nov 27, 2013
It’s been 730 days since I last used porn or masturbated, even though it has been two full years it does not feel like it was that long. I am as rebooted as I am ever going to be and I have NO intentions of ever falling victim to PMO again. Amazingly I made it two years without relapsing; the beginning of the process was the most difficult. Once I got some time under my belt I’d look at how many days I had been PMO free and realized that it would be a damn shame to blow it and start over at day one. The further along I got the easier it became not even think about PMO. Another source of will power was thinking about all the embarrassment I caused myself, unsatisfied women and feeling like less of a man due to PIED.
I was not the most extreme of PMO cases by any means but I would masturbate just about every night before going to sleep. Some weekends I would go on slight binges masturbating and viewing porn multiple times a day. There were times that my injured my penis from my frequency of masturbation. I slipped into the same cycle as others seeking out more extreme niches of porn to arouse me. Things that I initially found disgusting I began to captivate me and consume my thoughts. I would have to fantasize about hardcore porn to get aroused enough to have sex with a female.
I’ve struggled through relationships masking my PIED with pills and lies of why my penis was not functioning as it should, ‘chronic fatigue’ was my crutch. I was unable to properly bond with the women I was involved with which strained relationships. As most of you already know porn makes you look at women as sex objects in place to hopefully cater to your porn driven desires.
I remember the total disgust in myself the countless times I’ve laid be bed with a woman and my penis was completely lifeless. It’s like an ax chopping away at what makes you feel like a man with each failure. I was fortunate enough to bed some gorgeous women in my past only to be unfortunate enough to have a dead **** or unable to keep an erection and penetrate.
Today 730 days later I feel like a man and I have a normal libido for a 46 year old man. Sex is better than it been in a long time, I just need to find a steady girlfriend.
I often see guys asking in forums if they can go back to using porn after they have rebooted like it’s something that they cannot live without. It’s pretty simple if you go back to porn you will be back in the same boat prior to rebooting.
I wish I would have rebooted years ago and not been such a damn fool. I knew that porn was probably the reason for my ED but I was in denial big time. I just did not have the strength to let it go and I paid the price.
If someone would have told me I would go two years without masturbating I would have called them crazy. But I guess I was crazed for not believing in myself because I have made it two years. It makes me feel as if there is nothing I cannot do. I am more confident and assertive than before and I have no problems approaching and pursuing women.