I decided to start nofap after my girlfriend and I broke up around four months ago. She left me for another guy, so naturally I felt inadequate and insecure. Fapping came naturally, but like most of you out there, I felt terrible afterwards. It always seemed like a good idea at the time; I would justify it with the same nonsensical notions the majority of people out there tell themselves. “It’s natural.. everyone does it.. I’m just destressing..” etc. But doing it never changed anything, it just left me in a more unhappy place than I was before. I think most of you can attest to this. That’s when I stumbled across /r/nofap. I read all these amazing results and of the “super powers” acquired from not fapping. I decided right then and there it was worth a shot.
I wish I had kept a journal with more detailed results and struggles throughout this process. From what I can remember though, days 1-10 were by far the most difficult. I’ll be honest with the new people here, I personally think this was the most difficult time for me. I wanted to relapse every second of those first 10 days. Just don’t do it.. it’s seriously not worth it. Whatever you’re telling yourself to justify it is wrong. After day 10 I went in the opposite direction.. for somewhere around two weeks. Flat-lining occurred.. I even lost my morning glory. With this came a bit of depression, nothing major by any means, but definitely noticeable. The excessive energy I felt during the first week and a half dissipated through the end of the first month. After the first month things seemed to normalize again. I still went through stretches of extreme horniness, and times where I wasn’t at all, but on average I felt like myself again.. actually better than myself. There were still several times I wanted to relapse, but at that point there was no way I’d let myself do that. I’ve just been taking it one day at a time and I think that’s the best way to go about things.
So I think most of us are here for these benefits. I’ll tell you up front that I honestly believe in them. I used to be shy, I’m not anymore. I used to struggle with focusing, I still do but not nearly as much. I used to mess around at the gym, now I have a set routine. I used to lack the confidence to ask a girl out, now I don’t. I even enjoyed giving a presentation in front of the class, and I hate public speaking.
My Advice on how to Gain These Super Powers
I truly believe the benefits are real, but I think most people have the wrong impression on how to get them. I think they all stem from self confidence. I personally don’t believe that just not fapping will give you this. It’s what you do instead of not fapping. I urge each and everyone one of you to pick up a productive hobby instead of not fapping. How are you bettering yourself if all you do instead is sit on the couch playing video games all night? You’re not, and you’re also setting yourself up for a relapse… it’s so easy when you’re leading an unproductive lifestyle. Self-improvement will help you feel even better about yourself and give you strong will power to succeed. The most common suggestions I’ve read so far are studying, reading, and exercise. I think exercise is probably my favorite of these. When I got the urge to relapse I’d force myself to do push ups/pull ups/and even body squats. It has gotten to the point where I enjoy going to the gym, and I use that time to work through my pent up energy. I think the combination of not fapping, and what you do with that time to better yourself are what give you such a boost in confidence. Confidence to talk to the individual you’ve never had the courage to walk up to. Confidence to be out going, to speak in front of a large audience, to be the person you want to be in life. Get involved in new groups, meet new people, have fun! The more you do the more you’ll realize how good it feels, and eventually you wont even want to relapse.
Since my breakup and the start of nofap I’ve joined a new church and met tons of new people (I know most redditors aren’t religious, I’m just urging you to find something), I’ve gone from 144 to 159lbs, I’m set to graduate college at the end of the summer with two degrees (Accounting & Finance), and I’ve gone on dates with two girls and have a 3rd one planned in the near future.
tl;dr Do something productive with your life instead of simply not fapping. It will help tremendously with confidence, and you’ll need something to escape to when the urge to relapse hits, and trust me it will.
If this was a bit confusing, or anyone would like for me to clarify/help with anything I’d be happy to! Good luck to all my fellow fapstronauts!