I haven’t really taken the opportunity to write about my 90-day experience, however I feel like the young fapstronauts are entitled to our experience and stories. I originally joined the NoFap movement because like many of you out there I realised that I had a problem, and I needed support to help me. I didn’t come here to partake in the “ultimate challenge”.
I came here with Disrealization (or depersonalization, I can’t remember the name), insecurity, laziness, and lust for every girl in sight.
I fapped up to three times every day, because I originally thought that it was normal since I spent a majority of my time on the internet and there was this phrase going around at the time “The answer is always yes”, and it was in reference to masturbation. So I took it to heart from a young age and it stuck with me until I was thinking “Why can’t I say no”.
I heard about super powers and stories of over coming the addiction, I was brain washed by being told that quitting masturbation would make me the perfect man that I’ve always wanted to be, and then some. Even with all those stories it still was insanely difficult, because whether I liked it or not I wasn’t ready to give it up. I couldn’t imagine going the rest of my life without masturbation which I’m sure a lot of you are going through. So I became a hypocritical zealot with nofap and preached to my friends how horrible masturbation was while going with 1 – 2 week steaks before relapsing. I was still thinking about it as a challenge.
After months of struggling to get into the state of mind that would allow me to overcome masturbation I took a step in the right direction and told myself that it wasn’t a challenge, it was a life style. And let me tell you something, after I thought that it had only gotten easier. And just before I began my current streak I thought “I’m only on day 2, I can just restart tomorrow and not notice anything.” But you know what? I had been telling myself that for too long and I knew that I wouldn’t get anywhere with that mind set. Then days turned into weeks without masturbation. It took me a few weeks to accept the urges and to avoid them. Then the urges began lose more and more control over me. Until around day 30 – 40, when the urges were non existent. I had a short streak of depression and thought that I might as well masturbate since it didn’t feel like it was helping at the time, then I remembered the disappointment that I felt after I relapsed from a 1-month streak and how much worse it was than what I was feeling at that moment. I struggled on and the only days when I even thought about masturbation was during the last couple days before I hit day-90, not because I wanted to masturbate but out of anticipation for hitting day 90.
Now I now that a lot of you want to hear what benefits I’ve had so tell you: Sex didn’t rule my life, I can see pictures of sexy girls that aren’t my girlfriend and ignore them (I feel strange when I see them so I avoid them), I’m close to my girlfriend, I got over my first love, I’m more emotionally stable, I don’t have mental fog, and I’m not going to give all credit to nofap for this but I work my ass off, I take 9 classes, have several military recruiters watching and waiting (sorry my marines, I’m going army rangers), I work out with the football team and dominate, I have tons of friends and I focus on long term success instead of temporary satisfaction (not just masturbation, but drinking and such), it helped me stop doing drugs (not weed, I did real shit like cocaine and molly at parties, now I won’t even let people pack a bowl in my truck because I don’t want to be near it).
There’s much more but, if you take anything away from this, take this away. It gets better. And you’ll realize that you can do it. Also if you want more motivation, check out my last post on this board http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/28wi8v/you_know_what_i_think/
LINK – Post 90-day report