I’ll make this intro short. I’m 20 years old, and up until a few months ago, had a non-existent sex life. I dove head first into self-improvement after realizing I was addicted to PMO and had been for the last seven years.
After a lot of self-reflection on parts of myself I wanted to improve, I set to work. I learned as much as I could in my college classes, watched countless documentaries to challenge my ignorant beliefs, changed jobs, and swallowed up tons of material on confidence, dating, and attraction.
My journey started nine months ago. My goal was to become a better person, and most importantly, have sex and wonderful relationships with beautiful women. I’m happy to say I’ve made giant leaps of progress.
Since going pornfree(and really applying the things I’ve been learning), I’ve had more dates, more kisses, more sex, and more women asking to be exclusive with me than in the previous 20 years of my life combined times 2. I went from knowing nothing about sex to being confident in my knowledge and abilities.
In addition to dating women from my college, I signed up on OkCupid to try speeding things up. The only women I met on there weren’t quality relationship material. Rather, they were only FWB material. Here is where things get tricky…
You likely take one of the following two popular stances on that:
A: FWB is awesome! Sex all the time and never having to worry about relationship drama.
B: Meaningless sex is pointless and only sets people up to get hurt and misled. Save yourself for someone you care about.
I’ve found these both to be very accurate opinions in my particular case. The sex was really fun and felt amazing. It was great to feel something other than my hand for a change. These were invaluable experiences for me because they were excellent opportunities to learn about sex in low-pressure situations. Being able to confidently pleasure your partner can really set you apart from the crowd.
And yet, as fun as it was, I feel empty. Just as empty as before. It was really disappointing because I thought great sex here and there would give me some kind of feeling of fulfillment, but it didn’t. I want someone to LOVE. It sounds cheesy but sex isn’t enough; I want to feel a bond, a connection, companionship, the euphoria of pleasuring someone I really, really care about. I’m thinking I’ll scale back on the quantity of women I’m dating and focus instead on the quality. I want a MATCH for myself, not just a piece of ass.
Take my story for what it is. It isn’t necessarily advice or anything, just a brief description of my life experiences during my time on this forum. Perhaps it’s a perspective you’ll find helpful in your own life.